Power of Perception

guru1000

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In every man's life there comes a time of ultimate challenge- a time when every resource we have is tested. A time when our faith,values, patience, compassion, perseverance and tenacity are pushed to the limits.

Some people use such tests as opportunities. Others allow these experiences to destroy them. I used to wonder what creates the difference in the way we respond to adversity. What creates a leader and producer? What creates failure other than lack of work discipline? Why is it we have some people with joyous lives in spite of almost every significant adversity and others who would seem to have it all live lives of self pity and depression.

I for one have had my fair share of adversities. Imprisonment, loss of wealth, loss of status, and betrayal. Despite, I take it with a grain of salt and keep a great outlook to the world. Yet there are others , that have a wonderful life that live in despair, futility, defeat and hopelessness.

What is the difference in the way we think?

The difference is our perceptions. The way we communicate with ourselves and the action we take from this communication. People who succeed in any arena do not have fewer problems than people who fail. The only people without problems are ten feet under. Life's events do not determine who fails and succeeds. Our ACTION based on our perception is what makes the DIFFERENCE.

Thing do not change, we change.

Our perceptions will dictate our future results.

Life's events are not important. How we communicate these events and derive meaning from them is what matters. You can CHOOSE a positive or negative meaning out of any event. What do you choose to perceive?

Triumph is in correct perception. Events cannot deter a confident state. A confident state will always prevail. Why? Your perception of the event will be communicated in a positive way.

Pay close attention to your PERCEPTION. This is what makes the difference.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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guru1000 said:
...Pay close attention to your PERCEPTION. This is what makes the difference.
Be careful, people are going to say that their perception of the world is actually reality... :whistle:
 

joekerr31

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generally speaking i think ones attitude is initially a result of how they were raised. people who were raised in households where there was a lot of fighting, a lot of negative views on life, a lot of crises, a lot of failures, substance abuse problems, emotional and physical abuse, etc.

people raised in such environments tend to have been exposed to the 'ugly' side of life at a young age. not only were they exposed to such, but perhaps more importantly, they were not exposed to the positive side of life.

most people who have a love for life have such a view because either their parents did OR they had mentors / role models somewhere along the way that showed them a new way to look at life.

in the long run, some people take the time to learn new ways of looking at life and develop a winning attitude.

in the same way that we talk about being plugged into the matrix as it relates to male / female relationships, many are plugged into the 'life view' matrix when they are very young.

but in terms of the actual cognitive process difference between those who see the positive and those who see the negative, it really comes down to a very very simple belief that hinges on two elements...

1) being thankful for what you have
2) a belief in a greater power

its almost impossible to destroy people who have these two beliefs. you can take everything away from them and they will find the will to rebuild.

there are peopel who are successful monetarily without either of these two things, but most of them got lucky. they were born with exceptional genetics for instance, worked hard at say football, and caught a break and made it into the nfl. but for every one person like that, there are 10,000 who never make it to the nfl.

but whats interesting, is that of those 10,000 who don't make it, many of them still go on to have successful lives and its usually the ones who possess the two traits i described above. really, a 'winner' is someone who keeps going after a monumental loss. many who dreamed of the NFL and didn't make it give up on life. the real failure there is not that they didn't make hte nfl, the real failure is that they gave up on life.

people lacking those two traits, often when they are successful, will self destruct as well. being successful doesn't make you successful (chew on that for a while) - theres a difference between being successful and staying successful and being successful and self destructing.

britney spears is a great example. she was just someone in the right place, at the right time, with the right experiences and the right skills. in essence she got lucky. but she didn't possess the key fundamentals essential for success - and so when you ride that train down the tracks you find that it ends in disaster.

anna nichol smith was another example. she was blessed with huge knockers and got rich from it, but her life was a mess. elvis presley is another. heath ledger another. on and on and on the list goes.

people who possess the two traits i spoke of above won't necessarily become millionaires. but being rich isn't necessarily a trait of success. we all have different hurdles to overcome in life.

for instant, you might have two guys with identical backgrounds. one becomes a drug addict and is dead at 25. the other gets an education, works hard, and lives a normal life.

while we tend not to see either of them as 'successes' the reality is the second guy is a HUGE success. he escaped a life of drugs and death and managed to find a way to live a healthy long life. he may not be warren buffet, but given what he had to work with he's probably acheived more than a warren buffet - he is successful.

anyway, for your average human life is filled with disappointments and hardships. it just is and there is no way around that. i make over 100k a year and i find that just barely provides me with a comfortable life. i don't know how the average person, who makes about 45k where i live, gets by. they struggle, thats for sure, but they do find a way to get by.

my point being, life is hard for most people. left to their own devices, its natural that most people have a negative / self destructive approach to life.

but the ones who are successful are the ones who don't dwell on their current state. they don't look at their neighbours grass and say 'why can't mine be that green?'

instead they believe that their life has a purpose, that they are here for a reason, and they wake up every day being thankful that they are alive and thankful for what they have. those people don't waste their time worrying about life, failure, hardship, etc. - they role up their sleeves and dive in to life.

over time what you find is that these people, even if they don't all end up rich, all end up with a life that they've enjoyed. and in that sense they are as successful as you can really be.
 

guru1000

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joekerr31 said:
but in terms of the actual cognitive process difference between those who see the positive and those who see the negative, it really comes down to a very very simple belief that hinges on two elements...

1) being thankful for what you have
2) a belief in a greater power

its almost impossible to destroy people who have these two beliefs. you can take everything away from them and they will find the will to rebuild.
These two beliefs is what shapes your perception of the events that happen in your life. These beliefs you state are empowering to you because they shape a HEALTHY perspective to good or bad events.

The events in themselves don't mean much. The way we look at the event is ultimately how we process good or bad in our minds.

In most countries people mourn for the death of a loved one. There is one country that celebrates the death as he is moving to a better place. The event is the same. The perception of the event is different.

Is the glass half empty of full? Your perception will determine the answer.

Perceptions are derived from the core beliefs you hold to be true. So if you have healthy beliefs (including 2 you mentioned), naturally you will have a healthy perspective

When I was young I used to look at life like a boxing match 12 rounds. My opponent was the tribulations and I needed to win and get a KO. I would bounce back after every hard blow. That perception of tribulations brought me much success.

Twin brothers with the same parents. They were raised and educated the same. One went off to become drug addict in and out of rehabs. The other became a huge success according to society standards. What was the difference between the two? Both had identical events occur in their lives. Why did they reach different destinations? The events stayed the same. The way they communicated what these events meant were different.

Frankie Purdue knocked on 999 doors before he sold his chicken recipe. How did he perceive the 998 rejections that gave him the fortitude to continue?

Our perceptions will ultimately lead to a healthy or a self destructive life.
 

joekerr31

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guru, i agree 100%. thats what my post was getting at.

both being thankful and believing your life has a purpose are both perceptual things.

this is what i was trying to get across to str8up and others in a few of my posts. your attitude (which is derived from your perception) is everything.

its funny, i read a study recently (some of you might have seen it, it got some coverage in the media) where they concluded that the happiest people were people in their late teens / early 20s and people in their 60s.

why is that? pretty simple if you ask me. both those age brackets are living in the NOW. most (not all) late teens / early 20s, are just go through life without a care in the world. and most peopel after 60 are just happy to be alive, and they also live without a care in the world.

ironically for me, i had a pretty tough upbringing, so i actually find my 30s to be the most enjoyable point in my life.

but i can definitely see how for most people those age brackets are the happiest. because they are periods wherein people live hte most care free. where they let things roll off their back and wake up each day ready and willing to experience whatever life has to offer.

wheres many in their late 20s, 30s, 40s and 50s are so concerned with bills, marriage, kids, etc. they are always preparing for tomorrow and rarely living in today.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

reset

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joekerr31 said:
ironically for me, i had a pretty tough upbringing, so i actually find my 30s to be the most enjoyable point in my life.
My teen years were tough, but I had a lot of friends and I was active and it was dramatic and everything but I was very much in the NOW.

My 20s sucked. Although I went to college, learned a skill, did some other stuff, I think of it as a wasted decade. Lonely, no social life. Lots of angst. I stopped going out and partying around 21.

So, "NOW" I've recently turned 31 and working on having the experiences and perspective I wish I had in my 20s. I'm tired of being so serious and taking life so f'ing seriously, and I feel more that way as I stay in the present moment more and more.
 

romangod

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joekerr31 said:
but in terms of the actual cognitive process difference between those who see the positive and those who see the negative, it really comes down to a very very simple belief that hinges on two elements...

1) being thankful for what you have
2) a belief in a greater power

its almost impossible to destroy people who have these two beliefs. you can take everything away from them and they will find the will to rebuild.
Your thoughts are very encouraging. With the demons I'm dealing with at the moment my belief in a greater power is what sustains me and gives me hope, BTW........... I'm thankful for your great attitude. :p
 

joekerr31

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reset said:
So, "NOW" I've recently turned 31 and working on having the experiences and perspective I wish I had in my 20s. I'm tired of being so serious and taking life so f'ing seriously, and I feel more that way as I stay in the present moment more and more.
the biggest trick the devil (figuratively speaking) ever pulled was convincing you that what you DO in this world is what matters - it is what defines you.

the truth is that you simply exist. you are perfect. you are exactly what you are suppose to be.

just like a cat is what it was meant to be. or a flower, or a glass, or an elephant.

you are exactly what the universe intended for you to be.

the only thing you have to do is embrace that and go with the flow.

which doesn't mean laying around doing nothing, becuase that isn't your nature anyway. your nature is to do 'stuff'.

when a man comes to the end of his life and looks back on it, he doesn't ask himself whether he was rich enough, whether he banged enough women, whether he bought enough things.

a man asks himself 'did i find myself. was i ME?'

those who are able to say 'i found myself and i lived as myself, not as some brainwashed construct of society.' are the ones who can die at peace.
 

reset

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Great post man. You're right. I used to think everything was so important. And I'm not "not" doing stuff. The opposite. I'm doing more than ever before. I'm having a total meltdown and it's all over this board, lol. In a good way. Interceptor would say "I am uncovering mySELF" and I literally don't know who or what I am right now, other than the fact that I am taking my happiness seriously for once. And that means accepting myself and actually giving myself a chance. Never did it before. Self acceptance is a different feeling but I'm getting more used to it. :eek: :p
 

joekerr31

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reset said:
Great post man. You're right. I used to think everything was so important. And I'm not "not" doing stuff. The opposite. I'm doing more than ever before. I'm having a total meltdown and it's all over this board, lol. In a good way. Interceptor would say "I am uncovering mySELF" and I literally don't know who or what I am right now, other than the fact that I am taking my happiness seriously for once. And that means accepting myself and actually giving myself a chance. Never did it before. Self acceptance is a different feeling but I'm getting more used to it. :eek: :p
you are on the right path young grasshopper.

nothing is 'actually' important. things are only important because we make a decision to make them important.

in the objective sense the only things that are important are having food to eat, shelter, and a place to sleep. everything beyond that is important only in the subjective sense.

when a man realizes this he loses all fear of failure, of suffering, of change, etc. because nothing he encounters is actually so important as to be upset over failure, change, or suffering.

just let go, follow your inner passion, don't judge how you are 'doing', just get up and live life day by day. its amazing how things will amazingly fall into place when you stop trying to force them to do so.

its the old saying 'if you love somethign set it free. if it loves you back it will return.'

all we are saying here is 'stop trying to leash and cage your dreams so they can't get away. just let go and your dreams will come to you.'
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

reset

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joekerr31 said:
all we are saying here is 'stop trying to leash and cage your dreams so they can't get away. just let go and your dreams will come to you.'
;) yep that's the attitude.
 

jophil28

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Be careful, people are going to say that their perception of the world is actually reality... :whistle:
Oh no not more of this fluff.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Guru, some guys get it, some guys don't. Others want to get it and still others don't want to. The guys who will have the most success with this concept will naturally gravitate to it.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

guru1000

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Guru, some guys get it, some guys don't. Others want to get it and still others don't want to. The guys who will have the most success with this concept will naturally gravitate to it.
There are two sides to every coin.

You can argue a various of perspectives to any given scenario.

To make sure you are congruent with a WELL GROUNDED perspective, I find is to ask yourself one question.

Does this PERSPECTIVE enhance my life as well as others or take away from it?
 

reset

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or it will gravitate towards them.

:eek:

lol I perceive I needed to read these posts again today.
 

iqqi

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guru1000 said:
Does this PERSPECTIVE enhance my life as well as others or take away from it?
Exactly.

The more negativity you invite in your life (through negative perception and negative judgements), the more negatively your life will be affected.

Also, relating to the purpose of this forum and attracting women, one of the most unattractive traits in a human being is negativity. I've had to stop associating with people I really liked, because I couldn't stand their nonstop negativity. Negative comments and assumptions about everything they observed.

And its pysical affects on those people were pretty interesting too. They became pretty unattractive physically as well. (Gaining weight, not caring about their looks, sour expression of the face, ect.)
 

Purple-Haze

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Reality is relative because reality is perception. I agree with your post, guru. How we handle what comes our way determines our quality of life. I've seen the same thing happen to different people, and the outcome for each is usually different.

I mean, when you think about it, it's ALL really...just in our HEAD, isn't it? Happiness is within YOU. As is despair.

This is why I don't think one can pursue happiness because it is not outside of us. This is why it's good to learn to be alone and to be happy with that... We have everything we need in our own body and mind.

The beauty of being human is that we are not static beings - we have the potential for change. This capacity for growth is what keeps one sane (or at least me).

I'm slowly learning to let go of things and to not allow things to fester and brew. There is no point. I have a tendency to get paranoid about things and throw myself into an abyss of questions and angst. It's quite exhausting.

I want to change my perception so that my reality is a calmer one.
 

guru1000

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Purple-Haze said:
I've seen the same thing happen to different people, and the outcome for each is usually different.
This is why our CHOICES determine our destiny. The way we interpret the events in our lives is a good indicator of where our life is headed.

It is KEY to be HUMBLE enough to look at your own perception objectively to determine if it is well grounded or not. Does it enhance or take away from us?

The irony is when someone has a NEGATIVE outlook and refuses to OBJECTIVELY look at his/her perception.


I mean, when you think about it, it's ALL really...just in our HEAD, isn't it? Happiness is within YOU. As is despair.

This is why I don't think one can pursue happiness because it is not outside of us. This is why it's good to learn to be alone and to be happy with that... We have everything we need in our own body and mind.
Exactly. :up:

The beauty of being human is that we are not static beings - we have the potential for change. This capacity for growth is what keeps one sane (or at least me).
And to change we have to fully accept the fact that we are all fallible. This allows us to do some introspection from time to time to objectively determine if our perceptions are in congruence with our goals.
 
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