Playing hard to get - BS?

[Ramon04]

Hi everyone,

I've been hanging aroudn here and reading for some time now.

I see the point in not being a pushover, but playing hard to get or things like "do not call them for 7 days at least" seems to be BS (mostly). It may work with the really needy and immature type of women...

What attraction seems to boil down to is a positive "state of mind". Yet to get to that state of mind is quite a lot of work. There are of course obvious bull**** beliefs that need to be released - such as "being nice will attract women", and so on...

But to really be relaxed when talking to women involves personal growth on an emotional level, and that's the tough part. The more you practice approaching and talking with women, the easier it becomes. Some tips and ideas can certainly help the process, but there seems to be no way around maturing emotionally to really feel relaxed and confident around women.

Of course, you can try playing games and to me "playing hard to get" is just an immature game. Any other views on this?

 

[pagemaster]

Hey Ramon04. I agree with most of what you said, however, most of the stuff on the site and forum in my opinion must be applied to each case independently. I will give you a couple of examples.

I see the point in not being a pushover, but playing hard to get or things like "do not call them for 7 days at least" seems to be BS (mostly). It may work with the really needy and immature type of women...

Sometimes you have to play hard to get if the type of women is attracted to the games and the BS. You said that it may work with the really needy or immature type of woman and you are right.

For example,
I was seeing this 19 year for a good year and she FLAT OUT told me when we first started flirting that SHE LOVES THE GAMES and she likes to **** guys that can figure them out and make her want to be with them. This girl is very attractive weighs 110lbs, if hilarious, funny, sexy, and mysterious. She had guys fawning over her left right and centre, an ex bf who was desperate and is in love with her blah blah. She knew me for a good year before and all she knew about me was the I would talk on a pay phone at work to a girl that I was seeing. I then every now and then talked to her and would flirt and she started getting curious about me...She said she was CURIOUS to know what it was like to **** me, she wanted to satisfy this curiousity. From there on it was like a complete game EVERY day with her, she kept throwing crap out at me and kept dodging it by not really caring. A lot of guys on this forum say to be COVERT, while I was, but I didn't really care all that much to respond to her games and she HATED the fact that she could not rule me out or lose her attraction. I had ONE agreement with her and that was if she was to **** someone else, she MUST tell me because I don't want to catch no desease and by now we were ****ing without a rubber.

An example of her crap she threw at me was after we ****ed after work one night she texted me from college the next day saying "A guy in class asked me out for a drink, I will let you know if we end up ****ing" I was shocked and I just replied "Ok" and never heard another peep out of her about this so called guy.

Another example was when she texted me "I think my vibrator is tied for being as good as you in bed" I responded "Meh. nite" She then texted me "fine, whatever, ttyl" I never heard another thing about the vibrator ever again.

Those are just two examples, she loved the games, I didn't pay attention to most, I ****ed her for a good year with no real relationship etc etc.

You have to play hard to get with certain women, especialy the messed up young ones. I try to not put to much effort into thinking about how to play hard to get and just try and give only a little of my time when I can. I like to keep busy with stuff.

As for other women, some won't tolerate any hard to get crap and just will be able to figure you out.

What attraction seems to boil down to is a positive "state of mind". Yet to get to that state of mind is quite a lot of work. There are of course obvious bull**** beliefs that need to be released - such as "being nice will attract women", and so on...

In opinion, attraction is either there or it is not. You can do things to help women find you attractive but for the most part if a woman does not feel attracted to you, there really is not much you can do about.

And yeah, I do believe that there some beliefs that do need to be released, some women do like guys that are nice but being nice is a lot different than being a "nice guy"/

 

[CraigMack]

Hi everyone,

I've been hanging aroudn here and reading for some time now.

I see the point in not being a pushover, but playing hard to get or things like "do not call them for 7 days at least" seems to be BS (mostly). It may work with the really needy and immature type of women...

What attraction seems to boil down to is a positive "state of mind". Yet to get to that state of mind is quite a lot of work. There are of course obvious bull**** beliefs that need to be released - such as "being nice will attract women", and so on...

But to really be relaxed when talking to women involves personal growth on an emotional level, and that's the tough part. The more you practice approaching and talking with women, the easier it becomes. Some tips and ideas can certainly help the process, but there seems to be no way around maturing emotionally to really feel relaxed and confident around women.

Of course, you can try playing games and to me "playing hard to get" is just an immature game. Any other views on this?

I agree with most of what you said. I am all in favor of just being a real man and handling myself in accordance.

For some reason the idea that nerds cannot get laid has sprouted out over the internet. As PlayerSupreme said the other day ; nerds are getting laid everyday and have been since the beginning of time!

I see nerdy type of guys everday with girlfriends.

 

[Chemistry]

Some people just play too hard to get...

You've got to show some restraint... don't call a chick the morning after you get her number, because that's telling the chick she's the most important thing right now and you don't even know anything about her besides the fact that she's hot...

If people have to think about playing hard to get, then they don't have their own interests or enough friends... playing hard to get just happens to anybody who has a healthy social status, a job, and a good set of interests... writing it down as a rule for guys to follow is just so the guys who don't have their own sh!t together can make chicks think they do, lol...

 

[edmond]

Its ALL BS, so don't waste your time.

 

[Tyron]

I agree, you shouldn't play hard to get. You should be hard to get.

 

[DJsparky]

Look, in pick up, its about having a balance of certain things, you have a balance of nice guy and bad guy, you turn into the cool guy, you have a balance of hard to get with just there on time, you become secure naturally, as ive said and many of the guru's ive learnt from have said, its a balance of things.

 

[Ramon04]

Thanks for your replies, guys. Still, I do not see how calling a girl the next day after you get her number shows that she is the most important thing to you right now. To me it shows interest, and what's more important is how you come across in the actual conversation than whether you call the next day or later.