Pessimism Around Us...?

[solo1]

normally im a pretty upbeat optimistic guy.

But i dont know what the hell lately....most of my friends, acquantaces, some family too...getting all pessimistic and anti-social lately.

They're either
A) not in the mood to talk
B) absorbed in their own problems
C) anti-social

Im from NYC, and i understand people can get like this sometimes cuz of the shyt that happens here. dont know why but it seems like as ppl get older they just grow more distant and start getting absorbed in their own problems.
Hey i got problems too, but i dont dwell over little issues and i tend to move on from past failures and not look back. if i see a problem i go resolve it.

gets on my nerves that people keep looking on the negative side of situations...particularly the little things, which particularly bother my friends, stuff you could not imagine worrying over. i tend to notice they give up on things before they even start. dont know, maybe i should find some new friends.

This atmosphere around me makes me feel abnormal, that if i dont present a pessimistic/anti-social/close-minded behavior then im not 'normal'. feels like people respect those more who have worries than those that dont appear to have worries.

anyone?

 

[Hot Ice]

I think you should try to ignore all the negativity around you.

If you are the optimistic guy, be yourself. Try to cheer some people up then!
You shouldn't concentrate on this because wondering about why people are so negative makes you see things negative. It's destructable to see negativity.

Some people are positive and some negative, and this is what rarely changes in a person during his/her lifetime. Most people don't change and don't want to change.
You are going to positive direction. You are here to improve yourself and embrace life. The fact is, the only person you can really affect is you.

As people dwell on their problems you shouldn't dwell them dwelling their problems. Focus on the good side and choose to be with positive people.

Positive people like positive people. Negative people don't feel that good around positive ones, since it reminds them being so negative..

 

[RedPill]

A sales book I have (don't recall the name, by Joe Girard) gave a great description about people and pessimism.

It says there are three types of people - he calls them 1s, 2s, and 3s.

The 1s are the winners. They are rare. Everyone wants to be around them. Completely positive, nothing brings 'em down. Always the optimist, always looking to bring others up with them. The more type 1 people you have in your life the better. Always look to associate with them.

The 2s are most people. They have high hopes, but always have an excuse for things not going their way. They enjoy bringing people down to their level, and are envious of the 1s. Avoid them.

The 3s are the victims, the woe-is-me people. Extremely negative about everything. Don't even talk to them.

About a year and a half ago I realized almost all my friends were 2s and 3s, and I simply stopped associating with them. It's one of the best moves I've ever made. In my business, I don't deal with negativity at all. That includes not dealing with customers that are a major pain in the a**. There's too much opportunity amongst the positive.

Solo, if you've got an issue with people in your life being negative - either call them out on it or leave them alone. Being around it will bring you down.

 

[solo1]

you guys are right. lately i've been reading business/motivational books and altho my social life has been in a rut due to lack of socialization with these friends....i'm always striving to improve myself & outlook on life, even grown a greater passion for my field of study.

Redpill, most of these people i know are either 2's or 3's. Sometimes i dont even bother asking what they're up to cause i know they're usually up to nothing or just sleeping all day long, or on the computer. And knowing that, i wind up not having anything to talk to them about, neither are they interested to hear what i've been up to.

The 2s are most people. They have high hopes, but always have an excuse for things not going their way. They enjoy bringing people down to their level, and are envious of the 1s. Avoid them.

i get this vibe sometimes. jealousy/envy i dont know, but whatever it is, it's the idea of 'what's he so damn happy about and i have to be miserable?'
Basically self-victimization.

Solo, if you've got an issue with people in your life being negative - either call them out on it or leave them alone. Being around it will bring you down.

you're right and i should, but i guess i dont have much friends and people are usually busy anyway. the non busy ones either have nothing going for them or they just dont want to talk/doing anything.

 

[RedPill]

you're right and i should, but i guess i dont have much friends and people are usually busy anyway. the non busy ones either have nothing going for them or they just dont want to talk/doing anything.

You know what dude? **** those people. **** them up their stupid asses. The only reason you'd be reluctant to axe them out of your life is because you're afraid of having too few friends. One of the hard lessons of life is that most relationships with other people don't last forever, and so it is in the case of the friends you've made during your formative years.

What you should do, is just spend your time focusing on achieving your goals and making new, more positive and realistic friends along the way. Yeah it will lead to many weekends of "having nothing to do." There's no shame in that.

Be a leader. Do what you want to do, when you want to do it. I know it's hard to let go of negative people you once regarded as friends, but believe me - when you don't have to deal with the pessimism of negative people, life is incredibly less stressful.