TheNewGuy said:
Why not? Theres a mantra of "girlfriends are bad" on this forum. If this forum is truly about self-improvement, and not about getting as many chicks as you can, then I don't see why having a good healthy relationship is looked down upon.
... especially by those that played the numbers game prior to their marriage.
"Which is better" (relationships with a great woman, vs massive numbers) is a trick question because there really is no correct answer. I think maybe its an unintentional casuality of this sosuave training to point at a LTR or a marriage and say/presume that it was a result of some kind of cop-out or insecurity. Its as if no one even considers the possibility that maybe its because the guy found a really special human being that he's enjoying spending his time with, is genuinely happy because of it, and doesn't want it to end any time soon (or ever, whichever the case may be).
I used to have a close friendship with
the most DJ person Ive ever had known when I used to live in Mississippi. This guy was a good-looking cajun (with that accent) and had very sanguine qualities. He would say, "Azanon", quite frankly I sleep with a different girl every weekend, and sometimes different ones on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. He would say, its great and all, but you won't believe how chaotic my life can be sometimes. He told me stories of how some of them wouldn't just take (the f******) it, but instead would stalk him. And managing all of them eventually just became a major pain. And, of course, there's the always having to have "safe sex" (the sucky kind where you use a condom), and being worried about that going wrong and causing a pregnancy. He was specifically making the point that its not near as great as it sounds.
Anyway, he got to know my wife (and, yes, she found him charming too), and said to me, I like what I have but I envy your position just as much. He admitted to being emotionally empty inside and said he wished he could just come home to a sweet, and intelligent woman (like my wife) so that he could focus his time on other things instead. And no.. he wasn't banging my wife.
Bottom line, there's a lot of "grass is greener" mentality that goes along with this issue. Which is better? I'd say it just depends on several things, one of them
not being your age. These things would include said woman, your maturity level, what
you want in your life, whether you're still not sure what kind of woman you want (a rational reason to date different women), and so on. Some people, on the other hand, have no desire for a LTR of any kind ever in their life, and that's just fine too. Different strokes, different folks.
