Kidd55
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 5, 2019
- Messages
- 28
- Reaction score
- 8
- Age
- 35
Hi all,
I'm 30-years-old, was married for about four years, and I filed for divorce about two months. My wife moved out about three months ago, but our marriage has been dead for at least a year; we stopped growing as a couple and I stopped wearing my wedding ring last summer. We were together, off-and-on, for about eight years. We met when were in college--and probably should never have gotten married due numerous differences. We don't have any kids, our assets are already split up, etc. At this point, it's purely just paperwork and a court date. My wife and I haven't spoken in about a month, which is for the best. I know she's been talking to other guys as well.
Over the last few months, I've been busy w/work, gotten into impeccable shape, went to counselling to deal with my issues from the divorce, have started to volunteer, joined a softball team, etc. I feel like I'm in a very good headspace. Throughout my travels, I've met some amazing women and have gone out on a few dates. Some were good; others not so much. On Wednesday, I went out for drinks with a girl I used to work with. I've known this girl for about two years and when we worked together, she knew that I was married. When I first met her a few years ago, I found her super interesting and wanted to get to know her better. I could tell that she was into me. Drinks were fun, we shared a lot of laughs, it was her idea to bounce to different bars, I kino'ed her through the night (e.g., holding hands, kissed her a few times at the end of the night). I could tell she was somewhat tentative throughout the night, but when I kino-ed her, she started to loosen up.
I can tell that this girl is into me--and I'm into her, but it's super early and I don't know want to kill the fun vibe we have going. I only use the phone to make dates, so there's no endless texting going on between us. I know she's wondering about my marriage/status. In fact, she's friendly with some of my co-workers and talks to them regularly. My co-workers know that I'm going through a divorce--and I'm guessing our drink date could come up.
What's the best way to handle this situation going forward? Keep it fun, loose, and wait to bring up the divorce? Or should I get ahead of it now, be honest, and tell her that I understand if she doesn't feel comfortable seeing me? I'd like to see her weekly or even bi-weekly.
Thanks in advance.
I'm 30-years-old, was married for about four years, and I filed for divorce about two months. My wife moved out about three months ago, but our marriage has been dead for at least a year; we stopped growing as a couple and I stopped wearing my wedding ring last summer. We were together, off-and-on, for about eight years. We met when were in college--and probably should never have gotten married due numerous differences. We don't have any kids, our assets are already split up, etc. At this point, it's purely just paperwork and a court date. My wife and I haven't spoken in about a month, which is for the best. I know she's been talking to other guys as well.
Over the last few months, I've been busy w/work, gotten into impeccable shape, went to counselling to deal with my issues from the divorce, have started to volunteer, joined a softball team, etc. I feel like I'm in a very good headspace. Throughout my travels, I've met some amazing women and have gone out on a few dates. Some were good; others not so much. On Wednesday, I went out for drinks with a girl I used to work with. I've known this girl for about two years and when we worked together, she knew that I was married. When I first met her a few years ago, I found her super interesting and wanted to get to know her better. I could tell that she was into me. Drinks were fun, we shared a lot of laughs, it was her idea to bounce to different bars, I kino'ed her through the night (e.g., holding hands, kissed her a few times at the end of the night). I could tell she was somewhat tentative throughout the night, but when I kino-ed her, she started to loosen up.
I can tell that this girl is into me--and I'm into her, but it's super early and I don't know want to kill the fun vibe we have going. I only use the phone to make dates, so there's no endless texting going on between us. I know she's wondering about my marriage/status. In fact, she's friendly with some of my co-workers and talks to them regularly. My co-workers know that I'm going through a divorce--and I'm guessing our drink date could come up.
What's the best way to handle this situation going forward? Keep it fun, loose, and wait to bring up the divorce? Or should I get ahead of it now, be honest, and tell her that I understand if she doesn't feel comfortable seeing me? I'd like to see her weekly or even bi-weekly.
Thanks in advance.
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just don't drink too much next time. I don't even drink at all personally.