oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
So i just moved to go to school and im living in the dorms. I know a few people that live up here so that should make things a little less stressful. Ive been up here since thursday and i feel like ive havent been in control or thinking right since ive got here out of nervousness. I constantly worry about other peoples opinions and whether or not what im doing is considered right, i hesitate with practically everything, and even when i workout i have a sense of anxiety, not to mention dont feel how i used to after i would get done lifting. Ive had some good chances to talk to girls but didnt because bullsh*t excuses. Just about all the time i dont feel like myself at all. When im nervous im not fully aware of what im doing. Sometimes ill eat by myself cause no ones hungry and i feel kinda like a loser. I suppose i could sit with random girls and meet them, but thats kinda hard when you have the shakes already. When i was in elementry school i remember eating by myself and not having many friends, it was almost the same until my junior year in hs. I really dont feel any emotions except fear. When i was driving up here i wasnt the least bit excited or nervous in a good way, nothing at all. I hesitate and let my mind run the show, im just along for the ride. I understand stepping out of your comfort zone is a good thing, but i feel completely vunerable. I need a way to get control and relax...i need something.
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