wanderwithwe
New Member
wander with me
my brother he says:
"do you understand the nature of women?"
We laugh and we joke
he's watching me.
He's listening to what I am saying intently. He is my brother and I know him well. After all, I generally do not ask such a question if I don't have something to say. this isn't just some guy I'm yukin' it up with about women at work.
i have been struggling! I have been so confused and lost.
i have been attempting to put myself first recently with a recovery program. It put me, after about 3 months of working with this in my life, in a state of open mindedness to experiment with the potential usefulness of these mental exercises.
You know totally lame stuff like:
POSITIVE THINKING (I am a being of light moving matter, etc)
MANAGING YOUR TIME (weekly schedule)
FILL ALL OF YOUR TIME 4 categories (recovery, mind, body, spirit)
SET GOALS (to get the natural high that comes from obtaining milestones)
MEDITATION! (fkn hippies right!?)
Well being sober put me back in the way of trying to figure everything out. Something has been bothering me about this whole thing and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It all seems so good... I didn't get a lot of help early on and as a result am more a product of my dysfunctional upbringing than of my environment, which I have been suspicious (to the point of excessive self destruction) about since I could start reading books.
My brother then cracks this joke about the matrix.
Then he asks me seriously if I want the red pill or the blue pill.
after some questioning he says it's too much information to keep talking about and that I need to read a book. "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi.
He fly's home that is far away and I buy this book and read it.
Erghm!
In a week.
It was a very upsetting week.
I can usually read things that interest me that much a lot faster, however, some of the concepts presented took time to process requiring me to re-read paragraphs many times before I could really understand and spend time defining new vocabulary terms. (Most notably Hypergamy)
It is a challenging book. It is the reason I'm making this post right now! A lot of the research done for these concepts was developed right here.
I promised myself I wouldn't join this community until I finished with a decent understanding of just the implications of this information.
True understanding began bringing forth strong resentment. It also helped me finally forgive my mother. It spoke to me in a way I have rarely been spoken to and it was the way a man speaks to another man with passion and love.
All the warnings in the world can not prepare you for how you eventually have to cope with it. I'm just going to say that to start.
Among other things I am excited to introduce myself! I am still a little bit sick you see... from the experience. Still sorting through a lot of the information, making the connections for myself. Experimentation has produced immediate results for me. I've never been the average Joe and embracing that has provoked female attention throughout my entire life. I never expected to need game or even considered it all that much. As I am I've even had the need to figure out ways to reject women. It always troubled me that these types of girls would persist. Lot's of things about what's up used to bother me because I couldn't understand. Some things still do even though I understand.
It's MEN that have what I have been seeking for in women all along. This is how twisted my mind was up in it. Society has been whipping me like a runaway and I didn't even know it. Pardon the grotesque analogy, but it really defines the state of offence I am dealing with.
As I walk about life it's women who are the first to ask of my furrowed brow: "Tell me your feelings." and now I finally know they can never understand!
As I suspected only other Men can validate my passion. You know what it's like to be a man like me.
The book accuses me of being enviable! 35, no kids, single. I'll agree and add it also bestows upon me the need to clearly define the responsibility that comes with discovering this power.
It's a weird time to discover and understand something like this in my position!
I'm still reeling internally but I thought it prudent to speak up that we may celebrate another brother. For better or for worse I have found my purpose.
Thank you for your insight.
my brother he says:
"do you understand the nature of women?"
We laugh and we joke
he's watching me.
He's listening to what I am saying intently. He is my brother and I know him well. After all, I generally do not ask such a question if I don't have something to say. this isn't just some guy I'm yukin' it up with about women at work.
i have been struggling! I have been so confused and lost.
i have been attempting to put myself first recently with a recovery program. It put me, after about 3 months of working with this in my life, in a state of open mindedness to experiment with the potential usefulness of these mental exercises.
You know totally lame stuff like:
POSITIVE THINKING (I am a being of light moving matter, etc)
MANAGING YOUR TIME (weekly schedule)
FILL ALL OF YOUR TIME 4 categories (recovery, mind, body, spirit)
SET GOALS (to get the natural high that comes from obtaining milestones)
MEDITATION! (fkn hippies right!?)
Well being sober put me back in the way of trying to figure everything out. Something has been bothering me about this whole thing and I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It all seems so good... I didn't get a lot of help early on and as a result am more a product of my dysfunctional upbringing than of my environment, which I have been suspicious (to the point of excessive self destruction) about since I could start reading books.
My brother then cracks this joke about the matrix.
Then he asks me seriously if I want the red pill or the blue pill.
after some questioning he says it's too much information to keep talking about and that I need to read a book. "The Rational Male" by Rollo Tomassi.
He fly's home that is far away and I buy this book and read it.
Erghm!
In a week.
It was a very upsetting week.
I can usually read things that interest me that much a lot faster, however, some of the concepts presented took time to process requiring me to re-read paragraphs many times before I could really understand and spend time defining new vocabulary terms. (Most notably Hypergamy)
It is a challenging book. It is the reason I'm making this post right now! A lot of the research done for these concepts was developed right here.
I promised myself I wouldn't join this community until I finished with a decent understanding of just the implications of this information.
True understanding began bringing forth strong resentment. It also helped me finally forgive my mother. It spoke to me in a way I have rarely been spoken to and it was the way a man speaks to another man with passion and love.
All the warnings in the world can not prepare you for how you eventually have to cope with it. I'm just going to say that to start.
Among other things I am excited to introduce myself! I am still a little bit sick you see... from the experience. Still sorting through a lot of the information, making the connections for myself. Experimentation has produced immediate results for me. I've never been the average Joe and embracing that has provoked female attention throughout my entire life. I never expected to need game or even considered it all that much. As I am I've even had the need to figure out ways to reject women. It always troubled me that these types of girls would persist. Lot's of things about what's up used to bother me because I couldn't understand. Some things still do even though I understand.
It's MEN that have what I have been seeking for in women all along. This is how twisted my mind was up in it. Society has been whipping me like a runaway and I didn't even know it. Pardon the grotesque analogy, but it really defines the state of offence I am dealing with.
As I walk about life it's women who are the first to ask of my furrowed brow: "Tell me your feelings." and now I finally know they can never understand!
As I suspected only other Men can validate my passion. You know what it's like to be a man like me.
The book accuses me of being enviable! 35, no kids, single. I'll agree and add it also bestows upon me the need to clearly define the responsibility that comes with discovering this power.
It's a weird time to discover and understand something like this in my position!
I'm still reeling internally but I thought it prudent to speak up that we may celebrate another brother. For better or for worse I have found my purpose.
Thank you for your insight.