Online dating and e-mail

[mahon83050]

I am doing some online dating just to broaden my horizons. Of course, I am NOT just relying on this because that would be AFC. On lavalife, you can send a smile (to show interest) without writing something. Well, I sent a smile yesterday to one cute girl, she sent one back to me today. Basically, the girl probably looked at my profile and was NOT turned-off, it does really mean much. I was thinking of sending a message to her today, but I think that may be jumping the gun and coming across as desperate? Do you guys apply e-mailing to the same rules of phone DJ tactics (3-day rule etc.) My good friend tends to disagree.

 

[ApocalypseCow]

Originally posted by mahon83050
I am doing some online dating just to broaden my horizons. Of course, I am NOT just relying on this because that would be AFC. On lavalife, you can send a smile (to show interest) without writing something. Well, I sent a smile yesterday to one cute girl, she sent one back to me today. Basically, the girl probably looked at my profile and was NOT turned-off, it does really mean much. I was thinking of sending a message to her today, but I think that may be jumping the gun and coming across as desperate? Do you guys apply e-mailing to the same rules of phone DJ tactics (3-day rule etc.) My good friend tends to disagree.

No, the 3-day rule definitely does NOT apply to online dating. These chicks are getting tons of offers; they'll forget you in 3 days! Definitely send an email ASAP (I recommend not sending more than one email a day, though). After 1 or 2 emails, ask for her phone number. Then, wait a day or two and call her to try and set up a date.

 

[Ronin I]

Yes - do not wait 3 days to email her back. I say email once a day or once every other day with the goal being to get the # by the 3rd or 4th email.

Do a search for a poster named Krynnster - he has some good advice/tactics for online dating (I have "borrowed" some of his tactics and they have worked pretty well).

Also, make sure to get a couple of recent pictures of the chick. Some of these online broads will lie about their looks or post a VERY flattering pic of themselves leaving you VERY disappointed when you meet.

 

[Quick]

Send an email immediately. Not contacting her doesn't make her think about you, it makes her forget you. The purpose of not calling was always to build anticipation, and enable you to come across as not desperate. Not emailing won't accomplish any of that. After you get to know her pretty well and she seems to be keying on you, then you can give a pause.


And add 15 pounds to whatever picture she shows you or whatever weight she tells you. Girls online are notorious for that. Your goal should be to build enough intrigue and trust as soon as possible to get her willing to meet you. A long period of email will serve no purpose, and you still start over once you meet her in real life, no matter how long you emailed her back and forth.

 

[SLIKKER_THAN_AVG]

I was talking to a few girls who are on Lavalife...they said that in total of smiles, emails, IM's..they get an average of 5/6 per DAY......yes there are many AFC's out there and the ratio is in the girls favor..so just send the emails..dont wait for a few days after the smiel because chances are she wont know who the **** you are.

 

[mahon83050]

Originally posted by SLIKKER_THAN_AVG
I was talking to a few girls who are on Lavalife...they said that in total of smiles, emails, IM's..they get an average of 5/6 per DAY......yes there are many AFC's out there and the ratio is in the girls favor..so just send the emails..dont wait for a few days after the smiel because chances are she wont know who the **** you are.

Yea, I hear ya: I am not even e-mailing the real hot ones, mostly girls in the 6-8 range. I am sure girls who are a 6 get bombarded alot. Lavalife is ok, but match.com is a waste because there is way too much competition.

 

[matius]

I am not even e-mailing the real hot ones, mostly girls in the 6-8 range. I am sure girls who are a 6 get bombarded alot.

Failing to understand the attitude here. First of all, the real hot ones- they might be porn stars some jerk off took from the Web and posted it so as to make you think she is a real hot one. But if there is an attractive girl trying to meet people online, why would you not contact her? I bet you everyone thinks like that and she hardly gets any emails. Let them make the choice.

I met a girl online who is super hot and sexy. Swear.

Are you saying that you feel reluctant to send a very attractive woman an email over the Internet? Sounds a bit strange.

 

[SLIKKER_THAN_AVG]

speaking of which..mahon what would you suggest in response to a girl who has a private picture..and she asks to see yours first? Mine is private as well. About the whole "control thing" would you press to see hers first or give up yours first? its kinda like a huge power struggle..im faced with that right now actually this girl sounds hot from her profile (key word is SOUNDS) but shes pressing me for mine..i have no problem giving it to her but i dont wanna just roll over for any b*tch who asks me to...online or in real life..any suggestions from anyone else would be appreciated.

 

[mahon83050]

Originally posted by SLIKKER_THAN_AVG
speaking of which..mahon what would you suggest in response to a girl who has a private picture..and she asks to see yours first? Mine is private as well. About the whole "control thing" would you press to see hers first or give up yours first? its kinda like a huge power struggle..im faced with that right now actually this girl sounds hot from her profile (key word is SOUNDS) but shes pressing me for mine..i have no problem giving it to her but i dont wanna just roll over for any b*tch who asks me to...online or in real life..any suggestions from anyone else would be appreciated.

I am not sure, that is a tough one. Are you on Lavalife? I usually do not even bother with chicks who do not have a picture. I would say hold out until she gives her, show her you are a MAN!

 

[ApocalypseCow]

Originally posted by mahon83050
I am not sure, that is a tough one. Are you on Lavalife? I usually do not even bother with chicks who do not have a picture.

This is a MAJOR mistake. There are a lot of cute girls who don't post pictures because:

1) They don't want their friends to see that they are using online dating.
2) They want to get replies from guys who take the time to read their profiles.

On Match, some of the cutest girls I met didn't have pictures. Ask them for a picture in a private email and they'll almost always send one.

 

[mahon83050]

Originally posted by ApocalypseCow
This is a MAJOR mistake. There are a lot of cute girls who don't post pictures because:

1) They don't want their friends to see that they are using online dating.
2) They want to get replies from guys who take the time to read their profiles.

On Match, some of the cutest girls I met didn't have pictures. Ask them for a picture in a private email and they'll almost always send one.

Good point, lesson learned!

 

[Unbridled_1]

bump

 

[Bud Wiser]

Originally posted by ApocalypseCow
This is a MAJOR mistake. There are a lot of cute girls who don't post pictures because:

1) They don't want their friends to see that they are using online dating.
2) They want to get replies from guys who take the time to read their profiles.

On Match, some of the cutest girls I met didn't have pictures. Ask them for a picture in a private email and they'll almost always send one.

Amen, don't overlook those pictureless posts. Read enough of them and you'll even be able to predict their hotness with a fair degree of accuracy before they send you a photo.

 

[Shadow Dancer]

I agree with not waiting to email. Do IT QUICKLY. But not more than once a day.

Personally, I get her number or at least her IM name after the first email. But if you choose to do a few emails first, do them quickly and get her on the phona asap. Don't aggressively push it but don't lag either.

*Oh yeah...YES...YOU MUST SEE PICS!!! MORE THAN ONE. AS MANY AS POSSIBLE IN A VARIETY OF POSITIONS AND SITUATIONS. I can not stress this enough. To break this rule is to commit a cardinal sin. Heed this advice or you WILL regret it.*