As long as I can remember, I have had a very severe case of obsessive compolsive disorder(OCD). For those of you who don't know what OCD is, it is a personality disorder that makes you perform "riturals" or it will just bug the pss out of you if you don't do it depending on your severity.
My particular case is very embarassing and not even my closest friends know about it. What I do is I go out in my yard(I live in a secluded area so no one sees me)and I get a stick and tap it on the ground and kind of act out fantasies that I have(like playing pro-sports and stupid sht like that, nothing sexual). I can control it until I see or hear something that triggers the urge for me to do it.
When I was younger some of the kids I knew caught me doing it and I got teased and picked on so much for it, because they misunderstood a personality disorder for being weird(honestly can you blame them?). That hurt my self-esteme alot and caused me not to have hardly any friends for a long time. And I sure as hell couldn't had ever thought of getting a girl because I was known as "stick boy".
After a few years and as I got older, everyone just kinda forgot about it and I convinced everyone that I didn't do it anymore. I still did, but just kept it a secret. Now it is something that my friends joke about with me, and I laugh with them but they have no idea that I still do it and if I can help it they never will.
I really want to stop doing it though because it is so annoying and takes about a minimum of two hours out of my day. It really doesn't effect my school, work, or social life, but it is just something that I want out of my life. The days that I am busy and don't do it, I am going insane on the inside, but I do not show it. Any suggestions on overcoming this without seeing a doctor because they would give me medicine and I want to overcome this by myself and without medicine.
This is the first time that I have ever talked about this to anyone, so any positive feedback is greatly appreciated.
My particular case is very embarassing and not even my closest friends know about it. What I do is I go out in my yard(I live in a secluded area so no one sees me)and I get a stick and tap it on the ground and kind of act out fantasies that I have(like playing pro-sports and stupid sht like that, nothing sexual). I can control it until I see or hear something that triggers the urge for me to do it.
When I was younger some of the kids I knew caught me doing it and I got teased and picked on so much for it, because they misunderstood a personality disorder for being weird(honestly can you blame them?). That hurt my self-esteme alot and caused me not to have hardly any friends for a long time. And I sure as hell couldn't had ever thought of getting a girl because I was known as "stick boy".
After a few years and as I got older, everyone just kinda forgot about it and I convinced everyone that I didn't do it anymore. I still did, but just kept it a secret. Now it is something that my friends joke about with me, and I laugh with them but they have no idea that I still do it and if I can help it they never will.
I really want to stop doing it though because it is so annoying and takes about a minimum of two hours out of my day. It really doesn't effect my school, work, or social life, but it is just something that I want out of my life. The days that I am busy and don't do it, I am going insane on the inside, but I do not show it. Any suggestions on overcoming this without seeing a doctor because they would give me medicine and I want to overcome this by myself and without medicine.
This is the first time that I have ever talked about this to anyone, so any positive feedback is greatly appreciated.