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Nice DJ / Nasty DJ

Cloud-uk

Master Don Juan
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Just a thought I had recently...

A lot of the time I feel like there are two ways I can handle a situation, while not flicking that "WRONG" switch in my head. You know what I mean, after a while doing things right (well, according to here at least!) you know when someone is doing something very....AFC, and you bury your proverbial head in your proverbial hands- just plain wrong.

Well, while avoiding the "wrong switch" people here, the guys who aren't quite there yet and occasionally come up with stuff that is AFC, I find that there are mainly two kinds of guys here. Or at least, two different mindsets.

One is the Nice DJ, the other is Nasty. I'm not saying one is better than the other, in fact I'm not even saying I'm right (might always just be part of my deluded imagination...) but it certainly seems that way.

On one hand you have guys that still make a concious decision to respect girls, and be nice to them. This is just the jist I get, but it sounds like they will give gils gifts and compliments- but in moderation! The key thing that separates them from AFCs is this, they know that girls are no big deal, and they are by no means desperate.

On the other, you have the guys that make a concious decision not to do the above. Where as the nice DJ flirts with a bit of complementing, the nasty one makes fun of the girl. Gifts are out of the question. I'm not saying these guys think of girls as possesions, but its fair to say they don't look upon them as "another exciting and beautiful member of the human race"- they're different, but equal. What separates them from jerks is that they are, as a general rule, smarter and more in control of their ****. Its just the other end of the spectrum to the nice DJ.

Well, this is just the general idea I get from a lot of posts- maybe its just people acting tough or whatever- but my point is that even if I'm totally off the mark we all have different DJing styles.

I really want some people to knock about some ideas on this- for example what do you think you are (as much as I know you all hate being pigeon-holed into one set group) but if I'm totally wrong, then at least realise that this forum is not full of clones of yourself. You may have an opinion on something, but that's all it is. If you think getting off with 20 girls and not telling them about each other is wrong, great, but your word isn't law. Similarly, telling some other guy that having a 2 year LTR in highschool makes him not fit to be a Don Juan is bull****. As some very clever mod once said- your here to learn, not to judge!

Anyway, so what do you think? Is there a divide?:confused:
 

ShizamDaMan

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I'd have to say I'm a Nasty DJ. I do bust on girls a lot, but it's never cruel or mean. All in good fun, they love it. I've been told "I hate you!" or "You're so mean!" so many times, yet these girls still want to hang out with me.

I do switch it to Nice DJ every once in a while, especially when I know I'm in with the girl :D
 

California Love

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I think you have to find a balance in being nice and mean - you need to act according to the situation. You can be inconsiderate yet still come off to the girl as a nice guy. In the long run, i think the nice DJ is better. Girls are naturally more sensitive than guys, and they appreciate kindness. Just dont go overboard, AFC style.


examples:

her dog dies - show some concern and pity

she loves nsync - accept it. Hell, even pretend that you like the band. She'll love you for this.

at the theatres, she wants to watch a movie. You want to watch a different one. - tell her she has to watch yours. Even though it may dissapoint her, your show of authority will gain her respect.

she complains to you about her boyfriend - tell her to STFU. She'll learn not to mess with you and use you as a pillow.



If a girl thinks of you as mean and inconsiderate, she'll most likely not let you go far with her. However, you can be an ass at times and still come of as a nice and considerate guy. Learning to push the right buttons is an invaluable trait.
 

heteropedro

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Originally posted by ShizamDaMan
I'd have to say I'm a Nasty DJ. I do bust on girls a lot, but it's never cruel or mean. All in good fun, they love it. I've been told "I hate you!" or "You're so mean!" so many times, yet these girls still want to hang out with me.

I do switch it to Nice DJ every once in a while, especially when I know I'm in with the girl :D
Damn, thats me yo.
 

misunderstood??

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Personally I see-saw between the two. It depends on lots of things like the girl in question and what kind of mood I'm in but sometimes I'll be a hard ass and other days I'll be more leniant. I think it's good to not be specifically one or the other because there are times when being a 'nasty' dj is appropriate and there was times when being a 'nice' dj is appropriate. I think whatever one you are most of the time is greatly influenced by how you were before you came to the site
 
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is it just me or does this post seem pointless? u be a fricken "nice" DJ, thats like being and AFC all together. Where does the C and F come in when youre too busy complimenting and showering her with gifts??
 

ShizamDaMan

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Being a Nice DJ doesn't mean you're AFC. It just means you take a different approach to dealing with females. You're still confident, you're still C+F, you're still everything she wants with either style. But a Nasty DJ focuses more towards poking fun at the chic, while the nice DJ pokes fun at other things (celebs, people around him, situations, etc).

I'm definitely a Nasty DJ by default, but when I get a bit closer I switch to a Nice DJ approach. You Nasty them to make sure they know you're special and not an AFC, then you Nice them to hint at your interest, nothing definite though.
 

Kraken

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I find it disturbing that it's come to the point where whenever the word 'nice' or 'compliment' is mentioned, 'AFC' seems to be lurking right behind it. It's a grossly misused word, probably 1/5 of the forum doesn't even really know what it means anymore.

I'm a guy that would be considered C+F, and I don't hesitate to make use of neg hits - but I don't mind using a compliment to create some contrast at the same time. Is being a gentleman being AFC? No, it can actually come off as charming and classy if dosed correctly.

And Cloud, you're right. Of course there's different kinds of DJs, we're all very different people making use of the same concepts in our own ways.
 
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