Morning,
I came across this forum as I was researching about relationships. I've been listening to PlayerSupreme and trolling these for insight. I have to say that this forum is very useful.
A little background, currently I ran into oneitis for the first time. I have been questioning myself trying to figure out what the hell came over me. I was with a girl for 12 years, married for 5. I lost the lust for the relationship and hell just ran into marriage too soon. I am 33, I left her at 32 and started to venture out on my own. I have been in flings with girls including almost getting busted by the cops getting it on in a Fox & Hound parking lot with a girl I only knew on the second day. I am not Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt but I take care of myself and have been killing it at the gym.
Fast forward, I ran into these two girls at the pool. One of them a 40 year old cougar. I got their numbers and then text the cougar for a few days then I was off to my own thing. Then a month later I caught back up with her at the pool on Sunday (fathers day). So we talked about going out, we text over the next few days then Tuesday night she came by, we chilled at the pool and talked, I kissed her a few times, we head back to my place and got it on the first night. For the nex few weekends we were banging like crazy. Friday her place, saturday mine, sunday her place and monday I am leaving at 5am to get to mine to change for work. I was smitten and we were having fun then she went on a planned cruise. She turned 40 in Jan and her and 3 friends and her family decided to book it. She was gone a week, and I waited. Friday she docked, got signal and called, I left a contingency message on my voicemail, letting her know I was at work and thinking about her.
She got back, we got to humping again, all was going good but then the red flags came in. You see cougar has been divorced twice, she had no kids, she was a public defender. She told me in the few weeks we knew each other that she does cocaine. I was toxified by the poon and blew it off, figuring it was like a weed habit. She never did it infront of me and her friends were involved in it too. As the weeks progressed we have some great nights out, she eventually took me out to dinner with mom and aunt. Then her brother came into town because her mom was having minor surgery. Well I met her grand parents and other familty members. Things were going good until the surgery her mom had turned for the worse. After she had it the week of she started to feel bad, she had to go into the emergency room and it got worse.
I get a call at 9am Saturday morning from a teary sounding cougar who said the doctor informed her that her moms small intestine might be dead. Over the next few weeksn and a few surgeries her mom started to pull through. I was kept at bay while her brother flew in from Cali and consoled her along with her family. But something was wrong. She took off a week and a half from work and that was piling up on her when she got back. I gave her space, let her do her thing which a few times she mentioned I didnt need to just because I thought she needed it but I didnt want to smother her. The girl knew I was fallin for her and there were small things I did that stood out.
Well fast forward to the end of September (20th) and the distance was growing, it turned into good night calls. I saw her on a Friday day before she went to see her mom, got it on and she left. We talked and she started having doubts about us. You see cougar wanted kids, she wanted to adopt and made the decision before getting with me. I told her I was fine with her decision but she wanted to tell me so if I decided I wanted out she wanted to know. She seemed like she was insecure. In fact on her left arm she had the initials of some dude probably her first lay carved into it (crazy women). Anyways She kept going on about I deserve someone better and she did not feel the same as me and so on.
this girl has been shooting me mixed signals all along, she made it sound like I was a guy she wanted to chill with. Keep in mind I am a 33 year old with a 40 year old. She's a cute girl but she became wishy washy. So I blow her off the next few days as she grew distant. She text me because she had a capital murder case coming up and she was having dinner wih the attorneys and some expert witness person. Well the next few day was silence, then I text her asking about her mom and assuming she was busy at work. I get a text saying she was at the adoption center and that "we need to talk". I text her back that I was at the movies but I hope this talk is something we can work out. I got nothing back. Friday around lunch time I get the "it wont work out text". She trim me off like the fat on her plate of drama.
The texting went back and fourth with me telling her how a mature 40 year old lawyer has to do this via text and doesnt have the gull to stand up to me in person. The girl must have had some insecurities because she told me that fiday when the judge was talking about how prissy she is that sometime she said she feels so "doublewide". Anyways I had some of her stuff that I told her about and she arranged to meet some time to swap it out but never said when. A few days go by and we just stopped talking. I got tired of waiting around and boxed her stuff up. I went to her place and left it at the door and text her that I did so and that i was just easier for me and goodbye. She text back "take care of yourself". I went no contact for about 3, or 3 1/2 weeks.
On the 4th week I got dumb. You see I am good with numbers and memory. So Thursday night/Friday morning around 1am, I was leaving this bar from playing volleyball. I get pulled over for speeding and I was drinking but I waited to drive. So what do I do when I get home, I panicked and called her. It went to voicemail and I went on letting her know that aside from our differences I got a speeding ticket and I wanted to know if she could help. I did not go all on about the relationship, just called to ask for a favor.
Woke Friday morning feeling like crap and then realized that I actually called her. So I did the next thing and text her. I apologized for calling so late, told her to disregard the text and that I should not have contacted her. She text back about a hald hour later "it's fine".
So there you have most my story without the small details that made us what we were. The problem is I faltered. I don't regret any of it but I shouldn't have went commando in her. I think because we had unprotected sex (which I never do) that I was caught up in poon potion #9. I came to this sight and have read some of the posts by Warrior and others here that are pretty deep. I also have been listening to PlayerSupreme on the ipod. I guess I am still pining for her but its been a long while and I have not got on top of another girl yet to make her fade away even faster.
I just wanted to thank those that contributed to this site and help me understand girls. I wish I would have got here sooner.
Oh and for those who know cocaine, divorced twice, 40, are red flags....yea I totally got blind sided by the poon. Trust me, my lesson has been learned. Problem is, here in Dallas, coke is kind of the glamour drug with these chicks. I dont do it but Dallas Texas is a hub for that crap., just f.y.i.
I came across this forum as I was researching about relationships. I've been listening to PlayerSupreme and trolling these for insight. I have to say that this forum is very useful.
A little background, currently I ran into oneitis for the first time. I have been questioning myself trying to figure out what the hell came over me. I was with a girl for 12 years, married for 5. I lost the lust for the relationship and hell just ran into marriage too soon. I am 33, I left her at 32 and started to venture out on my own. I have been in flings with girls including almost getting busted by the cops getting it on in a Fox & Hound parking lot with a girl I only knew on the second day. I am not Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt but I take care of myself and have been killing it at the gym.
Fast forward, I ran into these two girls at the pool. One of them a 40 year old cougar. I got their numbers and then text the cougar for a few days then I was off to my own thing. Then a month later I caught back up with her at the pool on Sunday (fathers day). So we talked about going out, we text over the next few days then Tuesday night she came by, we chilled at the pool and talked, I kissed her a few times, we head back to my place and got it on the first night. For the nex few weekends we were banging like crazy. Friday her place, saturday mine, sunday her place and monday I am leaving at 5am to get to mine to change for work. I was smitten and we were having fun then she went on a planned cruise. She turned 40 in Jan and her and 3 friends and her family decided to book it. She was gone a week, and I waited. Friday she docked, got signal and called, I left a contingency message on my voicemail, letting her know I was at work and thinking about her.
She got back, we got to humping again, all was going good but then the red flags came in. You see cougar has been divorced twice, she had no kids, she was a public defender. She told me in the few weeks we knew each other that she does cocaine. I was toxified by the poon and blew it off, figuring it was like a weed habit. She never did it infront of me and her friends were involved in it too. As the weeks progressed we have some great nights out, she eventually took me out to dinner with mom and aunt. Then her brother came into town because her mom was having minor surgery. Well I met her grand parents and other familty members. Things were going good until the surgery her mom had turned for the worse. After she had it the week of she started to feel bad, she had to go into the emergency room and it got worse.
I get a call at 9am Saturday morning from a teary sounding cougar who said the doctor informed her that her moms small intestine might be dead. Over the next few weeksn and a few surgeries her mom started to pull through. I was kept at bay while her brother flew in from Cali and consoled her along with her family. But something was wrong. She took off a week and a half from work and that was piling up on her when she got back. I gave her space, let her do her thing which a few times she mentioned I didnt need to just because I thought she needed it but I didnt want to smother her. The girl knew I was fallin for her and there were small things I did that stood out.
Well fast forward to the end of September (20th) and the distance was growing, it turned into good night calls. I saw her on a Friday day before she went to see her mom, got it on and she left. We talked and she started having doubts about us. You see cougar wanted kids, she wanted to adopt and made the decision before getting with me. I told her I was fine with her decision but she wanted to tell me so if I decided I wanted out she wanted to know. She seemed like she was insecure. In fact on her left arm she had the initials of some dude probably her first lay carved into it (crazy women). Anyways She kept going on about I deserve someone better and she did not feel the same as me and so on.
this girl has been shooting me mixed signals all along, she made it sound like I was a guy she wanted to chill with. Keep in mind I am a 33 year old with a 40 year old. She's a cute girl but she became wishy washy. So I blow her off the next few days as she grew distant. She text me because she had a capital murder case coming up and she was having dinner wih the attorneys and some expert witness person. Well the next few day was silence, then I text her asking about her mom and assuming she was busy at work. I get a text saying she was at the adoption center and that "we need to talk". I text her back that I was at the movies but I hope this talk is something we can work out. I got nothing back. Friday around lunch time I get the "it wont work out text". She trim me off like the fat on her plate of drama.
The texting went back and fourth with me telling her how a mature 40 year old lawyer has to do this via text and doesnt have the gull to stand up to me in person. The girl must have had some insecurities because she told me that fiday when the judge was talking about how prissy she is that sometime she said she feels so "doublewide". Anyways I had some of her stuff that I told her about and she arranged to meet some time to swap it out but never said when. A few days go by and we just stopped talking. I got tired of waiting around and boxed her stuff up. I went to her place and left it at the door and text her that I did so and that i was just easier for me and goodbye. She text back "take care of yourself". I went no contact for about 3, or 3 1/2 weeks.
On the 4th week I got dumb. You see I am good with numbers and memory. So Thursday night/Friday morning around 1am, I was leaving this bar from playing volleyball. I get pulled over for speeding and I was drinking but I waited to drive. So what do I do when I get home, I panicked and called her. It went to voicemail and I went on letting her know that aside from our differences I got a speeding ticket and I wanted to know if she could help. I did not go all on about the relationship, just called to ask for a favor.
Woke Friday morning feeling like crap and then realized that I actually called her. So I did the next thing and text her. I apologized for calling so late, told her to disregard the text and that I should not have contacted her. She text back about a hald hour later "it's fine".
So there you have most my story without the small details that made us what we were. The problem is I faltered. I don't regret any of it but I shouldn't have went commando in her. I think because we had unprotected sex (which I never do) that I was caught up in poon potion #9. I came to this sight and have read some of the posts by Warrior and others here that are pretty deep. I also have been listening to PlayerSupreme on the ipod. I guess I am still pining for her but its been a long while and I have not got on top of another girl yet to make her fade away even faster.
I just wanted to thank those that contributed to this site and help me understand girls. I wish I would have got here sooner.
Oh and for those who know cocaine, divorced twice, 40, are red flags....yea I totally got blind sided by the poon. Trust me, my lesson has been learned. Problem is, here in Dallas, coke is kind of the glamour drug with these chicks. I dont do it but Dallas Texas is a hub for that crap., just f.y.i.