New Fling: How do I keep sexual tension and good sex / non friend zone.

[skipfontaine22]

Hello,

I am an older dude and I've had quite a few relationships with women throughout my life. I am somewhat quiet, and engaging in sexual activities has always made me feel significantly more confident in an early relationship.

However, I am beginning to experience some insecurity in this area and I want to keep the fire goin.

Recently, I met a 21-year-old girl at a bar, and we had fantastic sex. We're now spending time together, and she is interested in me. However, she is quite bold, while I tend to be more reserved. I can tell she really likes me, but I am sorta concerned about being eventually sent to the friend zone.

I would like to maintain a strong sexual connection with her and would appreciate any tips or book recommendations on how to keep the sexual tension alive. So far, I've tried teasing, sexual escalation, and being physically dominant. We've met three times, and although we had sex twice, the second time didn't quite match the intensity of the first.


If anyone can offer advice, I would be grateful. Thank you.

Books or resources on maintaining sexual tension and connection could be helpful.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Easy.

Keep things light and fun. Do NOT waste time chit chatting over the phone between encounters. Let her come to you. When she reaches out, plan the next fun filled encounter. That’s really all you have to do.

Do not verbalize your feelings, how great the sex is, how much you like her, or any of that mushy bullshvt. Just keep your mouth shut and enjoy the ride.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

I agree with everything suggested above…but I’ll add: you have to understand that there is for sure an expiration date. You can’t control that. It’s not about doing things to prolong it as much as it’s about not doing things to cut it short. And even a layer on top of that is that your mindset can’t be about acting rigid to keep the fling going. You have to genuinely be on your purpose, spin other plates, and keeping your frame air tight. That’s it,

 

[skipfontaine22]

Easy.

Keep things light and fun. Do NOT waste time chit chatting over the phone between encounters. Let her come to you. When she reaches out, plan the next fun filled encounter. That’s really all you have to do.

Do not verbalize your feelings, how great the sex is, how much you like her, or any of that mushy bullshvt. Just keep your mouth shut and enjoy the ride.

Thanks
I have told her she looks hot, but, aside from that, I've kept my mouth fairly shut.

 

[NorwegianDJ]

Do you know how to use your fingers and your mouth? How to take your time and genuinely play?
Do you spend physical time on her, outside of her ****oris and vagina? There's so much room for eroticism that a 21 year old girl often has no clue she is missing out on.
Discover this.
Infinite patience produces immediate results.

A book: She Comes First.
Dry and mechanical - good for most guys.
Just remember that sex is always happening and never ends and encapsulates so much more than intercourse. Treat it as such.
Stop focusing so much on orgasms and tracking how well you're doing, and shift your focus to curiosity and pleasure.