Need help! not sure what to do

[evil_tomato]

Hey fellas,

So ive been dating this girl from america, im from australia via long distance. We met through facebook and hit it off, been dating for about 3 months now and we are both really into each other/in love with each other. We skype and phone chat nearly everyday and everything seems to be going well. Im 25 and she is 18 but she is really mature for her age. She is suppose to be coming here in a couple of months to visit which im really excited about however i have a few issues.....

I recently met these two other girls who live in my home town who are crazily interested in me and i actually really like them aswell, both are pretty hot, sweet caring girls with heads on their shoulders and are the same age as me and no i havent slept with them or done anything with them yet but id like to continue getting to know them....one of them has even asked me out for dinner on the weekend, and while i said yes i feel really guilty inside as i know if the girl from america ever found out she'd be so heart broken....

In the last month i have fallen out of interest with the whole long distance and have just been finding it so stressful and boring. She is a great girl and probably would be perfect for me had she lived here but the fact that she lives x3473647364 miles away is hard. But i cant break up with her, because she will be so heart broken and hurt and im scared she might do something silly....

I am in a dilemma and dont know what to do.....please help!!!

 

[zinc4]

You have never even met this girl and you say you are in love????!!! I am slapping some sense into you...go for the girls in your town now! You can't love a person who you have never met....and even if you could, it wouldn't be after 3 months....you are obviously just a kid....go have fun immediately with the girls in your town...you don't owe this internet stranger anything...don't get caught up in the whole love word thing..you are in lust and there is a huge difference...you really love your family and parents..not this chick who you have never met but are infatuated with....like i said, you don't owe her anyhting..tell her the relationship is impossible and go meet the girls you can actually see in person...

And don't feel guilty about breaking your internet girl's heart...if her heart gets broken by a guy on the internet who she has never even met then she is likely a BPD nut job in the first place and it's all a BS illusion based on infatuation....

So don't let her manipulate you into feeling guilty...any sane person would realize a real relationship from that distance is impossible and plus you haven't even met yet from what i can see...

 

[Skyline]

I agree with zinc4.

The Red in quotes indicates why this isn't a good idea.

The Green in quotes indicates a good idea.

Hey fellas,

So ive been dating this girl from america, im from australia via long distance. We met through facebook and hit it off, been dating for about 3 months now and we are both really into each other/in love with each other. We skype and phone chat nearly everyday and everything seems to be going well. Im 25 and she is 18 but she is really mature for her age. She is suppose to be coming here in a couple of months to visit which im really excited about however i have a few issues.....

Long distance NEVER works because there is no physical attraction. I had a thing with a girl who was one state over and even then it was hard, i can't even imagine why you would engage in something like that across the ocean. Also, long distance is only a "Confidence/Ego boost" until someone else starts talking to another person and never speaks to you again.

Too much attention already. Skyping and phone EVERY day..? On top of that, saying "You love each other" when you two haven't even met. This isn't a Disney or some cheesy romance movie, you have a 99% chance of getting burned :trouble: . This fire you two have will be extinguished just as fast as it spread.

She's a bit young don't you think..?

I recently met these two other girls who live in my home town who are crazily interested in me and i actually really like them aswell, both are pretty hot, sweet caring girls with heads on their shoulders and are the same age as me and no i havent slept with them or done anything with them yet but id like to continue getting to know them....one of them has even asked me out for dinner on the weekend, and while i said yes i feel really guilty inside as i know if the girl from america ever found out she'd be so heart broken....

Oh look you have already started talking to other people, like i said, it's only a "relationship" until someone starts talking to someone else.

Let's see.. They're YOUR age, they live in YOUR area, they're MATURE, they're HOT, you've MET them, they're INTERESTED... And you want to give a girl a chance that you never even met and could possibly be not even for you..? I would take what's right in front of you before its too late, not only that, you have TWO chances.

Also, it's not "Love" like what zinc4 said, it's infatuation.

In the last month i have fallen out of interest with the whole long distance and have just been finding it so stressful and boring. She is a great girl and probably would be perfect for me had she lived here but the fact that she lives x3473647364 miles away is hard. But i cant break up with her, because she will be so heart broken and hurt and im scared she might do something silly....

Looks to me, you're going to end up ending things soon. When one person looses interest over long distance, it's nearly impossible to regain it because there's no PHYSICAL ATTRACTION.

There are some things in life we don't like doing, but have to do it for the greater good. Do you really think she or YOU would be happy on having to leave her/your friends and family to be with someone that may not even work out..? Or at the very best be a short term relationship..? If it doesn't work out, you or her are basically stranded and forced to start from scratch.

I know what you're going through, I was in the same boat as i mentioned earlier. You don't "Love" her, its infatuation. And you're simply HER confidence boost and shes simply YOUR confidence boost.
Unless you or her are making the commitment to move near each other(I strongly don't recommend this unless you have a job down there or something important), tell her this "relationship" will be on Stand By and to see other people in the mean time. After that, it's no contact for you.

I would take what's right in front of you before its too late, not only that, you have TWO chances.

Go get one or both of those ladies you just met, RIGHT NOW. And cut that 24/7 phone call, skype, "I love you", "She's perfect for me." desperation AFC crap too.
:trouble: :trouble: :trouble: