Need desperate LJBF situation help!!!!!!

[yellowboozer9967]

Hi everyone. I'm confused about my LJBF situation. My story is long but bear with me if you can! Thanks

I was LJBFed by this girl I've known for about five years. Actually, its happened 3 times with this same girl (last time was back in Jan) ...........

So the first time happened after I had known her for 3 months. We really got along after we met but I got the LJBF treatment when I asked her out formally. Being the good puppy I was back then, we stayed friends.

We started talking more and going out so I asked her again a year later. Same response. This time I was fed up. We stopped talking except in the presence of mutual friends. After a year and a half, she initiated conservations through aim/email/phone. I wasn't really interested so I ignored her. We graduated and I moved away.

She continued so I started thinking maybe things had changed so I became more response. We started talking for hours on the phone on a regular basis. I asked to a formal I had and she agreed to visit me and be my date. We had a good night, but nothing beyond dancing and hugging. So I visit her in Jan and stayed at her place. We went out and this time I held her hands while I asked her. Her response: "we can give it a try". Two weeks later, LBJFed over email.

I stopped communicating with her period. In April she said she wanted to visit and come to my bday party. I agreed but I ignored her at the party while getting drunk. We spoke less for less than two minutes at the party.

Fast foward to now. She's been initiating conversations again via email/aim/phone. I've ignored her as much as I can, sometimes not replying for weeks if at all. Suddenly last week, she wants to visit and stay over in my room (she stayed at her friends places previously even when I wanted her to stay over).

I agreed and she's coming next week. Can anybody help me figure out what this girl is thinking with these cyclical actions???????? I mean its not like she really needs me as a friend anymore since we don't even live in the same city. We don't even talk. I try to walk out of her life but she doesn't seem to let me.

Should I have agreed? I mean I like this girl and continuing to ignore her will not get where I want since we live far away now. How should I act next week? Should I act more intimately? How, given that I've done everything up to but not including the kissing stage?

Thanks, peace

 

[PumpingIron13]

My experience with being LJBF is that unless you get away from her for like 3 months then come back a CHANGED man then there wont be a change. If you dont change in her eyes then you cant expect her to suddenly change the way she views you. Just read about pedastaling in the bible and also the reasons guys get LJBF, its probably the biggest mistake and you can look back on it and know for a fact you made some dumb mistakes. When we really are afc and dig a oneitis like that we always think if they say things like lets give it a chance or whatever, that theyre finally giving in to us. Dont worry about her so much. Worry about yourself and livin a good life without her and maybe shell be more attracted to that. Girls have lives to, they wont date us because we need them, that would be like adding to stress in there life.

 

[Tomatoes]

This is a very simple situation.....Like it or not. Your girlie friend is an "ATTENTION *****". Basically she is keeping you stringed on. Shes is using you for her own self confidence. To me it sounds like she is never going to breach that area you want her to as in you 2 being an item. She knows how you feel. She is stringing you on mate. Its nice to have someone tell you your the best and that they want to be with you. I would see how this time goes. Throw kino in and see what happens. If she LJBF you again. Forget it....forever...shes just going to keep on ****ing you over.

 

[Fash]

Dude,

I had the same situation a while back. The best thing to do is to SHOW her that you can pick-up and f-close women and get her to HELP you and act as your "pivot" since you two are just "friends".

Her protective b1tch claws will soon come out and it will raise your value in her eyes!

Check out thie FR of the same situation I was in where I eventually f-closed an LJBF of 6 years!

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=92191

I hope this helps.

Fash