Need advice, want to outgame a possible gamer

[MonkeyButt]

Hey guys,
I've seen this woman 4 times in a week that I met on a dating site. She's pretty far out of my league career and money wise, but has pursued me relentlessly.
Some of my learned AFCisms are showing through and I'm starting to lose control of the situation.
The first night I played everything perfectly and closed, shocking the crap out of her the next day.
The next three times were similar.

Tonight, I phoned as we've been touching base nightly and she's "out with friends", so "lets talk tomorrow ok?".
Hmmm, pretty sure she met someone from the site. Forty minutes later, she's at home and texts me ... "still up? I just got home". Hmmmm, me thinks her meetup was crap, or she panicked and bolted as I didn't answer her "ok?" question.

Tomorrow night she's meeting her ex boyfriend to get her key back and return some of his belongings. Says she needs to say some things to him (who dumped her).
My guess is she's getting gamed, gaming me, and I want to be the one gaming her!

If I were more accomplished at this type of "dating", I wouldn't give a crap. Sadly indifference is a goal and dream at this point, so the thought of sharing bugs me.

We have an outing and sleepover planned for Thursday evening.

I'm not sure how to handle myself tomorrow morning (where was I tonight that I ignored her texts after I called). Or her thing with her ex tomorrow night.

Bit about her.
Successful (really successful).
My age, hot, fun, intelligent - very.
Vulnerable and wanted my opinion about how to handle this ex.
She also wanted my advice on how to handle her ex husband as he was trying to mess up our Thursday evening (she needed my resolve to stand up to him).

This woman could make a very rewarding fling/ltr, but I fear I'm going to blow it 'cause it's hanging by a thread (due to her confusion and my AFCisms).

My two cents, she responds to game.
My problem, I'm not very good at it yet.

Any advise ASAP would be appreciated. I'm getting anxious about this one and I don't want to feel this emotion.

Thanks,

MB

 

[grayclif]

I'm getting anxious about this one and I don't want to feel this emotion.

Your anxiousness is developing into onetis. Her level of success should matter little to you - what should matter is how successful she thinks you are. Please take Falcon25's advice:

Stay away from unavailable women, take things SLOW with women, and make them swoon for you. Any fool can get laid, but it takes a man to make them fall in love with you. Your goal should always be (once you master everything else) is to make any woman you want, to fall for you. Any idiot can fuvk a woman. His classmate, a girl he works with, etc. Any fool can do this. But only the truly talented MEN make them fall in love with them. The only way you do that is by going SLOW. Go slow with women, work out, make money, and travel. Good Luck everyone!

 

[MonkeyButt]

Thanks Grey,

Too bad about Falcon...

I ignored her last couple contact attempts (last night), and this morning some of her "mystery" was dropped.
She then asked what I ended up doing.
I'm going to have to get used to "gaming" I think. Feel guilty, however, I'm ... recovering nicely I think.

I also started moving on option 2 to distract me a bit.
Option 2 could turn out to be a more realistic option anyway.

I've been reading / practicing vigorously in the last couple weeks, but have not found a "game guide" or "gaming 101" sticky thread.

I've read the DJ bible, but any other links that I should read would be appreciated.

Thanks,

MB

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

She's pretty far out of my league career and money wise,..

No woman is ever out of your league.

Always make the woman figure out why she wont ƒuck you, never do it for them.

 

[Knight's Cross]

League has nothing to do with it. The thing I'd ask is do you want a powerfrau? The more I date women like this. The more I realize they are just like dating a guy with T*t$. It's no fun after awhile. If they have to compete in a mans world. They eventually will show you they are like a guy. Therein lies the problem. The inner struggle they have. They want to be treated like a woman, but at work be accepted as one of the boys. Is that what you want? As far as league, I've dated women that made twice what I make, and I'm pulling about 130k. I've had them throw themselves at me when I pulled off of sexing them. So as far as gaming them, they are no different than the girl that works at Starbucks. The same rules apply. It's just before you get them hooked on you, you have to ask,"Is it worth it"?
KC

 

[MonkeyButt]

No woman is ever out of your league.
Always make the woman figure out why she wont ƒuck you, never do it for them.

As far as league, I've dated women that made twice what I make, and I'm pulling about 130k. I've had them throw themselves at me when I pulled off of sexing them.

Duly noted! Thanks.

Is it worth it

Don't know yet. I have my reservations, but I'd like to follow through for the practice let alone the other potential benefits.

I think that my near fatal mistake is in making myself a little to accessible since I met her. It's clear to me that I need to distract myself and increase the man-woman ratio.

All these women I've dated so far push so hard for the AFCism that they eventually turf. It's hard to resist sometimes, but I'm working on the boundary thing.

MB

 

[DMSR76]

Hey guys,
I've seen this woman 4 times in a week that I met on a dating site. She's pretty far out of my league career and money wise, but has pursued me relentlessly.

As others have said, you should consider no woman to be out of your league.... especially one that you met on a dating site.


Be careful in that oneitis minefield.

 

[MaddXMan]

Internet dating: Where the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

I've met 2 recently who say "divorced" in their profile but turns out the divorce is not finalized yet. No thanks. Meeting someone so soon out of even a dating relationship is a red flag too.

But like you, I'm using this as gaming practice, and it helps to get back in the groove of talking to women and dating again. But I don't expect I'll get anything meaningful from an internet dating site.

 

[Johnnyventana]

She sounds like a playa beeatch! Just play her back. You know what to do. 180 your guilt and just do it. She'll be surprised and amazed.

Your 'self' is holding you back. Pretend you were giving advice to a friend, and do that.

 

[MonkeyButt]

Thanks for the advice.
I'm learning to work it.

Feel a little guilty, but ... there are meds that will take care of that (before I achieve my goal of "controlled indifference" .

MaddXMan: Both the ones I'm seeing from internet dating are fresh out of a relationship. I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, you don't want to get to close as they have sh*t to work out and are unpredictable. On the other hand, it's really easy to come off like a superstar and get adored for a spell just by listening and filling in the holes of their previous disappointment(s).

My only problem thus far (and I have an alternative thread for it), is maintaining my boundaries. This one will take some concentration.
Using this term as a metaphor, I have to watch out for my tenancy to say "me too"!

MB

 

[ArcBound]

Anti-Dump: if the guy and the girl are both playing games, they both lose.

 

[Johnnyventana]

"Anti-Dump: if the guy and the girl are both playing games, they both lose." True. It just spirals.

However, a lot of the bible is a 180 for a lot of guys on here. That was my point.

 

[MonkeyButt]

KaBoom!

"Anti-Dump: if the guy and the girl are both playing games, they both lose."

Yep, we lost!

I did have some fun and polished my "skill" a tad though.
Still bugged me, but I got over it in less than a day, so ... that's progress!

It ended up that I had a choice to cut her loose, or shamelessly manipulate her, which I just couldn't do. Turned out she wasn't a player, but rather a person with some personal issues. Saw some nasty meds in the cupboard while getting a glass ... yikes!

Need a new plate. I only have one spinning and I'm not that ... stable yet :s
Going to try to get the next one the old fashion way. No plenty of fishes.

MB