hey guys, i was looking for some advice. long story short i dated this girl, i was his first boyfriend, and first kiss. we started dating while she was a sophomore in high school and i was a senior. fast forward now she is a senior in high school and im a sophomore at a college that is 1.5 hours away. for first 2 years the relationship was amazing. I would come home on the weekends to see her and we would always have fun and spend a lot of time together. then out of the blue her texts got shorter and we would see each other less on the weekends. Then right before exams at my college and before summer break she says she wants to take a "break" because shes apparently going through a lot of things. a week later we meet and kiss and stuff and she says we will get back together in two weeks after she has had her space. two weeks go by and she tweets "i think its best to go separate ways", (doesnt even text me directly). so i go NC and she texts after a couple days "hope ur doing ok", i give in and ask to see her and i pick her up and in the car she tells me this is happiest shes been and that she felt i loved her more than she loved me. so i explode and basically tell her to go screw herself and call her ungrateful *****, etc., and i **** you not within 15 seconds something clicks in her head and she wants to be back with me. of course i was confused that someone could go so quickly from that to wanting to be back with me but love turns you into a fool and i couldnt fight my heart and took her back. things werent the same, all summer was terrible for me. She would always be too busy and I never saw her. We didn’t text as much because I would refuse to text first and lower myself. She was always short when she texting me to but still acted like she loved me. She always reassured me that she wanted to be with me when I asked. We would have good times together but the feeling of not being loved as much always outweighed these good times. I did everything I could to make her happy and took her out on dates whenever she wasn’t busy. I know I should have ended it earlier but I couldn’t as her promise that she wanted to be with me kept me around, and the sex was always amazing. Well come to the end of summer we go through a rough patch again because o was out of town for 4 days and she had a family member pass away so we didn’t see each other much. two days before I go back to school she starts acting weird again after I see her after not seeing for a week, and I asked her if she wanted to be together and she replied by saying she didn’t know. I told her im not playing this bull**** again and she said yes she wanted to, I asked if she had doubts about our relationship and she said “honestly yes.” She then had to leave to attend the funeral and I was left feeling broken hearted and back to square 1 again. The next day when we were going to hang out she texts me “lets have a good day like the old days” I replied saying of course love you so much blah blah.
So we see each other and I had a idea to take her out to do something fancy but she just wants to go out into town, I ask her before we go anywhere do u really want to be with me? She responds yes but a few moments later she starts acting nervous and saying I don’t know. And saying she doesn’t wanna hurt me and lose me so we drive around in my car for an hour while she makes her decision and keeps saying idk, at this point I don’t know what to do and feel helpless. I told her listen I want to be with u but I cant be with a girl who doesn’t want me back. So she eventually shakes her head no when I ask do u want to be with me. I take her to a park and she gets out and i say so its over? And she nods. I tell her to say it then tell me its over. She wont say it, but I tell her to say its over if that’s what she wants. So she eventually says “its over” and I say alright and I explode again telling her ive down everything for her and she shoudlve ended it the first time and how my summer has been nothing but **** cause of her. I go to my car to drive her home but she stays and calls her sister to come get her. I plead with her to come with me so I can take her home but she refuses. I ask so this is it then? By this point shes crying and telling me to go away so I leave. The next day I leave for college and she leaves me a letter at my front porch that my mom finds along with a box of my clothes. The letter basically says “I know you prob hate me…but you deserve so much better, I didn’t give you the attention you deserved, if you think this is selfish youll realize it isn’t when you find a girl that treats u ten times better. I still love you and its going to be a rough ride without you. This didn’t happen cuz of another guy. Tbh I don’t think ill ever be able to love someone like I loved you. I don’t even deserve someone that’s done half the stuff you’ve done for me. Youre my first true love and I wouldn’t trade past 2 and half years for the world. I hope we can reach good terms sometime and youll forgive me but I understand you may never forgive me. In the meantime im here if you need me. I wish you the best of luck in life and wish nothing but the best for you. Have a great year in college – love blah blah.”
If you’ve read this far I love you. Please any advice helps so far ive been no contact for a week and 3 days since the break up. She hasn’t contacted me. My emotions are a mess. I refuse to contact her. I know she wronged me but I cant shake her. That letter really tore me to pieces. Any advice helps.
So we see each other and I had a idea to take her out to do something fancy but she just wants to go out into town, I ask her before we go anywhere do u really want to be with me? She responds yes but a few moments later she starts acting nervous and saying I don’t know. And saying she doesn’t wanna hurt me and lose me so we drive around in my car for an hour while she makes her decision and keeps saying idk, at this point I don’t know what to do and feel helpless. I told her listen I want to be with u but I cant be with a girl who doesn’t want me back. So she eventually shakes her head no when I ask do u want to be with me. I take her to a park and she gets out and i say so its over? And she nods. I tell her to say it then tell me its over. She wont say it, but I tell her to say its over if that’s what she wants. So she eventually says “its over” and I say alright and I explode again telling her ive down everything for her and she shoudlve ended it the first time and how my summer has been nothing but **** cause of her. I go to my car to drive her home but she stays and calls her sister to come get her. I plead with her to come with me so I can take her home but she refuses. I ask so this is it then? By this point shes crying and telling me to go away so I leave. The next day I leave for college and she leaves me a letter at my front porch that my mom finds along with a box of my clothes. The letter basically says “I know you prob hate me…but you deserve so much better, I didn’t give you the attention you deserved, if you think this is selfish youll realize it isn’t when you find a girl that treats u ten times better. I still love you and its going to be a rough ride without you. This didn’t happen cuz of another guy. Tbh I don’t think ill ever be able to love someone like I loved you. I don’t even deserve someone that’s done half the stuff you’ve done for me. Youre my first true love and I wouldn’t trade past 2 and half years for the world. I hope we can reach good terms sometime and youll forgive me but I understand you may never forgive me. In the meantime im here if you need me. I wish you the best of luck in life and wish nothing but the best for you. Have a great year in college – love blah blah.”
If you’ve read this far I love you. Please any advice helps so far ive been no contact for a week and 3 days since the break up. She hasn’t contacted me. My emotions are a mess. I refuse to contact her. I know she wronged me but I cant shake her. That letter really tore me to pieces. Any advice helps.
