Natural DJ Turns out to be a dud!

[donjuan87]

Ok so you may remember that I posted a thread here a few weeks ago ( http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=90089 ) and I was really excited because my seemingly natural dj friend was moving in with me to finish out the school year. I thought this meant I could observe him and become a better DJ myself. WRONG!! Living with him, I now realize he isn't anymore of a Don Juan than the average joe. For instance, he was at a basketball game and the friend of a hot girl gave him the hot girl's number, because the hot girl liked him. So he calls her THE NEXT day, but can't get ahold of her. (Whew! He almost screwed that one up!) So he tries again a couple of days later, and this time she picks up. So they really hit it off, but he is making a huge DJ mistake! HE IS TAKING ON THE PHONE WITH HER FOR THREE, FOUR, EVEN FIVE HOURS AT A TIME!!!!!! He hasn't even met her in person yet!! (he's only seen a picture of her.) It's so fvcking sad! He is just talking to her for hours on end! Even right now, as I look across the room, he's taking to her! HE'S BEEN ON THE PHONE FOR OVER 4 HOURS STRAIGHT!

How do I get him to stop acting like such a chump? He doesn't believe me when I tell him he's handling this wrong. It isn't even DJ talk, just alot of soft talking and soft laughing, almost giggling. It's making me sick! It's the disgrace of all Wichita!

 

[donjuan87]

Does anyone have any answers?????

 

[JonJack]

Pffft... If your friend isn't whining and complaining about girls, who the hell cares what he does with them?

This is what a lot of people here fail to realize. It's not whether a person comes across seeming like a DJ or being very smooth or whatever. What's important is how the person handles his interactions with girls, whatever the outcome may be. If he's complaining about not getting any pvssy, then talk some sense into him and show him the way if you really know what the way is. If he's not complaining and he's still going about his life perfectly happy, then no point bothering about it.

You can't convince someone that the things they are doing is wrong if they don't see anything wrong with it in the first place.

 

[Shiftkey]

If it works for him, let him be. I take it she hasn't rejected him?

 

[seanchai]

I wish I had the phone game to keep a girl I've never met on the phone for four hours. Don't you realize how f*cking incredible that is?

 

[donjuan87]

No, she hasn't rejected him, but everything his is doing goes against the Don Juan Bible.

 

[everywomanshero]

I have scored...

I have scored many, many very fast fcloses after long convos on the phone. Long convos aren't bad as long as she's really having fun. She'll often cancel and blow off other guy's because she's busy talking to you and finds you really interesting. Guys who think a phone convo must be 10 minutes or less have no confidence in their verbal skills.

4 hours is ****ing off the hook though. Crap! Wait and see what happens. Let him try this with 4 or 5 girls. Then have him move at a furious pace of esalation with 5. Compare the results, then make an educated guess which method is better for him.

 

[JonJack]

Originally posted by donjuan87
No, she hasn't rejected him, but everything his is doing goes against the Don Juan Bible.

If he doesn't believe in the Bible, he's a pagan. Are you a DJ evangelist? If you're not, then just drop it man. No issue.

 

[manuva]

Originally posted by donjuan87
No, she hasn't rejected him, but everything his is doing goes against the Don Juan Bible.

There's more than one way to skin a cat. Hopefully this will expand your horizons.

 

[MetalFortress]

Originally posted by donjuan87
No, she hasn't rejected him, but everything his is doing goes against the Don Juan Bible.

Who effing cares? It's not like it's the Holy Bible. It's not only just a set of guidelines (not rules), but it's FALLIBLE.

 

[TheRelic]

She clearly likes him.... he'll prolly lay her... bugger the rules.

 

[Bloke]

Most guys here see DJing (being a man) as a set of rules. How wrong they are, & how soon they will be free of natural progression until they relize otherwise.

We can all agree this site is designed to create DJs out of boys.
& in essence a DJ is about being a man.

Tell me, do you think he is less of a man than you because he break this basic 'DJ rule'? You are wrong. People prefer what gets the job done, & what they are comfortable.

Basically, always trust the gut & follow your instincts, what's right is right.

Do you see the irony in you whinging about himj breaking the rules, when he is actually speaking to a girl?

 

[RBB]

Originally posted by seanchai
I wish I had the phone game to keep a girl I've never met on the phone for four hours. Don't you realize how f*cking incredible that is?

Fvck that p*sses me off. No offence to you, not an attack at you. It just brought back memories for me.

See, back in the AFC days I had a conversation with a HB from the US from 8:30pm to 4am. We hadn't even met. I got her number from a friend. By the end of the conversation she was getting all kinky, you know, "I'm in my panties, everyone is asleep in the house." But my talkative 14 yr old AFC a$$ said, "Ewww..!" Fvck THAT sh*t. It never got sexual. She eventually, after 2 weeks of phone calls, said she was interested in another fukken guy. I even walked 2 miles to see her. I wrote her a love letter.

FVCK.

Now I'm 21, I'm not wasting anymore time. Erg, fukken hell. Point is, who cares about phone game when you have REAL game. Apply your alphaness sexuality and she'll be over to 'talk' with you in 5 mins.

Erg, I can't believe I was ever like that. FVCK.

--

To donjuan87. You're gonna have a hard time trying to convince him what he is doing is wrong. Forget about him and work on yourself.

I have a really shy friend who I'm trying to change. I want him to be an addition to the sarging team I got going on. But I've realised that he won't accept help til he looks for it. Just drop it.

 

[Teen Spirit]

She told him she diddn't have time for a relationship and that they should stay friends that had a chance to grow into lovers. He told her, "If I can't have you romantically, I can't have you at all." The man after a few nights his stomach felt like it was churning cement, His emotions grew too heavy and he cracked. "Hello? Can you ever forgive a fool like me?" he asked ."No, you have missed your chance!" "Hmm well I'll think about it" she replied. He later sees her around the city, she sees him and starts flirting with other guys sayin how she needs a man in her life. She walks past him "Im too self absorbed right now, you'll miss me when Im gone." It hit the man hard, just a few days a ago she told him she diddn't have time...she lied and now shes makin it known. The man was still a fool, Please give me one more chance he pleaded... "Well alright", she replied. The man was happy he had a hope left in his heart, hed call she seemed distant.She even went as far as to block the man on Aim. He confronted her I thought we were alright. "Oh I have problems in my life and things I cannot think about." The man thought, I got it, I will reply " I will give you space, and reply when you are ready". It then came to the man what did he do wrong? Why was she being so cruel. He tried his hardest and she diddn't seem like she cared, she probaly diddnt. He then deleted her myspace from his. She messaged him, how childish. He then replyed like blocking. He finally had the guts to face reality, Lets just move on with our lives goodbye and blocked her. She never had the intent of forgiving him at all. He knew and lost all hope, he had the power to rip out the chunk of heart she had left.

Well this basically happened to me, I learned alot of lessons from this. One-itis is a disease that clouds your instincts. That women are sweet but they can be just as cruel, I really never thought that women had it in them to do this. She lied about the relationship, and about forgivness and to smit the man with her messages. Well Im pissed and ready to become a greater man. I just wanted to share these two cents with you all.

 

[Sanity_Cleaver]

donjuan87, you are an absolute idiot.

Let me get you in on a little secret: this 'DJ Bible' stuff is a load of crap.

Apparently its the be all and end all of dating women but its not.

All its there to really do is help you develop the confidence and inner game to go out and meet and feel comfortable around hot women. Its not some magic code to live by-

- its just the training wheels.
Because once you get your inner game sorted out you can do whatever the **** you want- because youve got the skills, the style, the inner strength to do whatever you bloody want.

This hot girl is obviously really into your friend and your friend can do whatever he wants and hell still get her. Why? Because hes a natural and hes already got all the inner game he needs. Once you have that you can do whatever you want too. Really- the best advice anyone could ever give you is 'just be yourself'.

Why try and be a 'DJ' or a 'PUA' and only get girls using systematic techniques and mindsets when you can just become comfortable with your own insecurities and get the girls NATRUALLY, just by being yourself?

Your friend doesnt need some stupid bible to attract a woman, he just knows he can. Sometimes all this supposedly AFC stuff is actually the best thing around. Why play '****y and funny' and 'wait three days' when its so much more seductive and charming to just let the girl know you like her? I mean what would YOU prefer?

The DJ Bible is a starter kit, not the ****ing gospel. The minute you realize you dont need it and forget all about this crappy DJ business is the minute you will truly become one.

 

[backbreaker]

just about all of you miss the point.

You will attract some women if you don't follow what's in the bible. That's not what the bible is for.

If a girl is attracted to you physically, there is very little you can do wrong right off the bat.

I know a girl, who is just fine as hell, and there is this guy who likes her, does everything you can think of wrong.. Calls and CRIES on the phone, buys flowers all the times, offered to move to be closer to her, yet they havnet even had sex, let alone dates him, gets mad when she wants to go out.. and remember they aren't dating, calls at least 5-6 times a day, I can go on and on... but she talks to him because he is very good looking, which is his only saving grace.

one of two things will happen. She will eventually CAVE IN and date him, and eventually break up with him because she is miserable, OR she will just stop talking to him all togther.

Niehter one of thoose positions are positions you want to be in.

getting the girl isn't the goal, or the prize, that's what alot of you don't get.

I can go to the mall right now and talk to 100 girls and I guarantee you one of them would date me by the end of the day.. but that doesn' tmake me any more of a man because I "have the girl"


However, your chances of KEEPING her without being a complete ducsh bag, or a totally princess worshiping AFC are slim to none.

Once the newness of the "relationship" wears off, so will she.

When I was an AFC, a total AFC, I never had a problem attracting good looking women.. Keeping them attracted to me was my problem.

Eventually she will say to herself, "hey, if I can get this guy trating me like a princess, I can eventually get a better guy INTERESTED in me" and move on.

 

[DonJuanMonk]

A DJ is not a set of rules, rules are what keep you from being too much of a sissy but it is only the appearance of it not the actuality of being a real DJ. True this man was being a girl for taking to this girl for for several hours, I used to do that. Nowadays the most I'd go is 45-60 min IF the convo is good. But with overage charges on cell phones, I keep that a minimum.

 

[Red Ran Amber]

So he calls her THE NEXT day, but can't get ahold of her. (Whew! He almost screwed that one up!)

Calling the next day is not that big of a deal. Waiting a few days can make you not seem desperate, make it look like you lead a busy life, make her wonder about you, etc. If you are in fact desperate, this can make it seem less such. It can also give her more time to become cold towards you or forget about you, though.

I prefer to call within a day or two unless I'm genuinely too busy to. The way I see it, she'll be more likely to remember me and more likely to remember the positive state she was in around me. If I'm not in a desperate state then it won't come across as desperate, but it will show her that I remembered her which I think is a good thing. No one wants to be an afterthought.

 

[mrRuckus]

Originally posted by MetalFortress
Who effing cares? It's not like it's the Holy Bible. It's not only just a set of guidelines (not rules), but it's FALLIBLE.

Oh, so it IS like the holy bible.