Funny---I remember the invisible thing and other variations.
Remember this one?
You are single and NO girl pays attention to you.
Period.
But--!! You get a GF and--I shyt you not--every fvcking 8.5+ chick walking down the godd@mn street and her 9.2 friend both--yes! both!--STOP and blatantly check you out!
You--of course--not wanting to get caught gawking by your GF, try not to notice. The self control this takes is of Oscar-winning caliber, and by that measure, I've earned countless Oscars...
...but inside you clench both fists and silently scream one thing: WTF!!!!!
Later, when you calm down and think back on it, you clench both fists and actually scream WTF!!!!
15 years later, I still clench both fists and randomly scream in public "WTF!!!!"
Freaks people out.
Ok---just kidding there, but after being here, I understand it differently. I look at how clueless I was then and I look at myself and say "WTF?--jeezus, buddy...you were such a clueless fvck it is unbelievable!"
Ok, let's get down to it.
Invisibility is a related phenomenon. I can't convince you that what you're experiencing is a subjective experience (of course, by definition it is a subjective experience, but that's just low-value semantics...) YOU will have to go out and re-work your perceptions and see reality more clearly.
Simple experiment:
Step into a room at work where a number of people are gathered. Many of them seem engaged and don't seem to notice you.
But you are aware and instantly categorize EVERY SINGLE PERSON in the room before 3.5 seconds have elapsed.
Guess what?
Everyone else there is aware and have categorized EVERY SINGLE PERSON in that room in the same way and the same amount of time that you just did. That is, if you're aware of them, they're aware of you on some level, and that level is probably the same as the one you're on. You thinking that you're invisible is a skewed and subjective interpretation, but, in reality, they are aware of your presence and have slotted you somewhere--just as you have done to them.
If you're looking for overt signs of "I'm being noticed"---this is important when you've just improved yourself and need some re-inforcing feedback (completely natural), but that passes after awhile. You can just assume you've been noted. Don't hang onto the need for that type of notice too long or you become an attention wh0re of sorts ("I wanna get a reaction! I need a reaction!..or else I don't exist!")
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What is actually going on is a deeper, more complex interaction between you and the rest of people in the room. Focusing on "noticing you" is a less mature and sophisticated means of judging the situation than what you're cappable of doing.
You're noticed. Realize it. You're not getting the obvious feedback about it, that's not what's at issue here. You have to dig deeper and pay attention more to the subtler clues. You're ready for it, too.
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Random notes:
You work out but this doesn't show in the clothes you wear--???
This is ass-backwards in my experience. Usually physical self-improvement means that it will show up first in the clothes you wear since most clothing is deeply imbued with the need to cover flaws and show your form in a more flattering light. This is nearly universal in fashion (Mao jackets notwhithstanding..)--it is meant to enhance what's there or hide flaws and give the impression of good stuff underneath.
I can (and have) lose 25 lbs and look stunning in clothes. I even look good stripped, but not as good as I do in clothes since what flaws I have are not covered. If you look great stripped---(don't bytch, first...)---you SHOULD look unreal in clothes.
Examine the clothes you wear (as you noted.)
Let me offer this: if you're young, fashion is everything. People (the younger the more so, the more female the more so...) are herd animals in this respect. To be fashionable is very important: you wear what everyone else your age wears. I did it. And if that fashion happens to not to flatter your figure--you don't notice or think of it--you wear the fashion and think you look good.
Try to step out of that and find what simply looks good on you. If you've worked out and have a good figure, especially if it looks good w/o clothes, I guarantee you that the classic designs will make you look like a fvcking greek god. If what you wear doesn't do that now--my guess is you wear whatever comes out of the Gap or Banana Republic or Abercrombie or who-the-fvck-knows what trendy place you've been to.
You're not invisible--that's just subjective perception. You probably don't look bad in clothes, you just need to think for yourself on this--and the women will notice when you do.
