I just wanted to vent more then anything, so have an open ear for a fellow DJ. Ok, so the whole reason the ex and I divorced was because she had been fvcking some other guy behind my back for 6 months. I did not know this at the time, and then she asked for a divorce. So I agree because she had cheated on my a couple of times during the 15 year marriage, and she was also bat sh!t crazy and since she asked, I agreed because I really couldn't take any more of her jealous, raging, craziness. Well the first couple of days into the divorce I found she had been seeing that guy behind my back, found all the evidence, texts, pictures, etc.. to know they were genuinely fvcking. Even with this evidence, it matters not in the divorce except for alimony. So she still got the kids, a hefty child support payment, and immediately moved in with this guy she was cheating on me with.
Well now she is engaged to him, and this guy is spending every day with my kids that I can not. I only see them every other weekend. Just to see that they have a new dad who they get along with really does strike a blow to their real fathers soul. Now they are out spending time with him doing what I used to do with them. He pretty much found out what I did with them and now does these activities with them, even though he didn't do these things before. Now he fishes, camps, takes them hiking, etc... when before he never stepped foot outdoors. It just kills me as a father having my kids forcefully taken away from me because the family courts decided that is the best for the kids. I feel as if I am missing out so much of their life, and now there is this new guy who is taking that role from me, and to add to that, this dude was banging my ex while we were still married. It's not like she just met this dude after the divorce was over. If that was the case I would probably be way more accepting of the situation
Anyhow, that is all. I just needed to vent and get that out. I always spent time with my kids during the whole marriage, more so then the ex ever did, taking them out and enjoying nature, walks , bike riding, etc... and now that has been stolen from me and given to some other guy. It's messed up, but it is what it is. Certainly is a hard pill to swallow, seeing your kids hugging on another man and treating them as the new dad. Sometimes I almost feel betrayed by the kids because it almost seems as if they like him more then me, but I have to keep reminding myself that this is not their doing and just have to adjust to the new life they are given, and they are doing well. But it still gets at me once and a while when they tell me what they did with their replacement father, and I just have to nod along to it and pretend like I am happy with all the new experiences they are having with daddy #2.
I guess the main thing is just to man up and be happy for the kids and their new experiences. I can't make them choose sides or cause any resentment because this divorce was not of their choosing. I guess honor and integrity are the only tools I can use in this, because that is one thing nobody can take away from a man. But as a real man, I can say that it's a hard road to travel, but travel it I must.
Well now she is engaged to him, and this guy is spending every day with my kids that I can not. I only see them every other weekend. Just to see that they have a new dad who they get along with really does strike a blow to their real fathers soul. Now they are out spending time with him doing what I used to do with them. He pretty much found out what I did with them and now does these activities with them, even though he didn't do these things before. Now he fishes, camps, takes them hiking, etc... when before he never stepped foot outdoors. It just kills me as a father having my kids forcefully taken away from me because the family courts decided that is the best for the kids. I feel as if I am missing out so much of their life, and now there is this new guy who is taking that role from me, and to add to that, this dude was banging my ex while we were still married. It's not like she just met this dude after the divorce was over. If that was the case I would probably be way more accepting of the situation
Anyhow, that is all. I just needed to vent and get that out. I always spent time with my kids during the whole marriage, more so then the ex ever did, taking them out and enjoying nature, walks , bike riding, etc... and now that has been stolen from me and given to some other guy. It's messed up, but it is what it is. Certainly is a hard pill to swallow, seeing your kids hugging on another man and treating them as the new dad. Sometimes I almost feel betrayed by the kids because it almost seems as if they like him more then me, but I have to keep reminding myself that this is not their doing and just have to adjust to the new life they are given, and they are doing well. But it still gets at me once and a while when they tell me what they did with their replacement father, and I just have to nod along to it and pretend like I am happy with all the new experiences they are having with daddy #2.
I guess the main thing is just to man up and be happy for the kids and their new experiences. I can't make them choose sides or cause any resentment because this divorce was not of their choosing. I guess honor and integrity are the only tools I can use in this, because that is one thing nobody can take away from a man. But as a real man, I can say that it's a hard road to travel, but travel it I must.
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