My GF Wants Us to Know Deeper About Each Other's World

Fela Kuti

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This started when I told her that I'm going clubbing with my friends this Friday. She said that she wants to go along. I asked her what makes her so eager since usually she's not like that. After some pause, she said that even though we're days away from our 1st anniversary, we hardly know each other's world. By world, she means social circle. So, by going with me, she's hoping that she could know more about my friends. She then told a story about her ex. Even though she wasn't happy with the relationship, one thing she liked about her ex was that he always tried to get to know her friends, and get his friends to know her. I said, my way of thinking has always been "We have our times together, and times with friends. Two different worlds." She said that even though she understand my stance, she sometimes want those two worlds to be "joined".

Do you guys think her demand is reasonable? I know that it wouldn't hurt to do what she said. I even want my friends and her to know each other. But my problem is meeting her friend. I don't feel like to.

P.S. We have many mutual friends, actually. But not the ones I/she go out with often.
 

Smartone84

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bottom line, if you've been going out for a year and haven't met/hung out a few times with each other's REAL friends, then thats definitely not right
 

Fela Kuti

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I'm not intending to defend myself here, but I actually have some kind of social anxiety. I'm not comfortable with meeting new people.
 

immrtlwun

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I think what you two have is relatively normal. I'm sure she knows your real friends, she just wants to know what you guys do together. I have a lot of friends that my girlfriend has only met, not hung out with, and she has a lot that I've only met a few times and not had much conversation with.
As far as going clubbing with you and your friends, that's a little odd. I would start with having her come along to dinner or something chill with you and your friends, not clubbing though. Clubbing and partying are completely different settings for her to try to get to know your friends than something casual like dinner.
 

AKA FLEX

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Fela Kuti said:
I'm not intending to defend myself here, but I actually have some kind of social anxiety. I'm not comfortable with meeting new people.
This is something you need to address. If your reasoning for not wanting your social lives to be intertwined just because you wanted to keep your time with your friends separate, that would be one thing. But it sounds to me like you need to be meeting as many people as possible to get over your fear/"social anxiety".
 
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