My GF is a b1tch sometimes update 1

[aix237]

Ok heres an update:

I am on the couch right now and its 230 am and Im ready to sleep on the couch lol. She was acting distant for the past week or so and doing blatant things that made it obvious something was wrong. So I called her out today finally and shes like "I dont wanna live together anymore" that turned into turmoil. Her reason was that she hasnt felt happy with me and her life - yea right - for 2 weeks. She wants to move and be by herself. She did hint like she wanted to be together if we lived apart, obviously wants her cake and eat it too until she finds some other dude. I told her shes ridiculous and said go ahead im not going to stop you do what you gotta do and I dont need you in my life but i want you, jsut to claify that to her.

I just kept on saying why casue im not sitting at a desk right now? its hard in this economy to find a job give it sometime. she was like its not that I need to figure out what i wanna do with my life blah blah blah blah blah sh1t ive heard all before. She just said shes not ambitious right now about her job or anything and not into our relatoinship. I was like well did you listen to your manic depressive friend in san diego or your druggy friend from home lol. So i said well lets see how you feel in a couple of days or in a month. She agreed to see how she feels but cant make any promises. I was like im not going to sit around and wait. Try to to work it out if not oh well then get the fvck out. I said that. I left for a while iwth a friend. I tried to call her like 2 hours later but she didnt answer, she texted right back and said whats up? I didnt reply. an hour later i went home and she seemed in a better mood and was somewhat willing to work it out (probably cause i didnt return her text lol). But i had to badger her azz to get straight answers out of her cause honestly im not sticking around some half azz sh1t. We somewhat calmed down but i still know shes on the fence.

Our lease is actually up in december because i exteneded it till then and she knows this. But she plays dumb and says i only signed till july. Then she gave me the ultimatium again get a job by july otherwise im moving out. Thats what I thought all along but she didnt want to admit it.

God she really thinks she deserves a dude that makes like 500k a year right away. Well all i know is the dudes shes dated in the past. All non educated losers that got nothing on me and thats what shes going to get again if she decides to leave. I got a bachelors and Im finishing my masters right now. I know previous guys shes dated have a bachelors at best and are all push overs. I let that be known to her also that im not scared and not a push over like all her previous dudes. I also highly doubt shell find a guy that drives an 08 mercedes like myself lol.

I kissed her a couple times tongiht and she gave a kiss back but some were half azzed. I know she thinks shes got me so hard...whether she does or not i dont know. I really dont want her to leave and I am trying my hardest to get a job but its hard right now. Im going to sleep on the couch tonight when she wakes up shell be like wtf. Tomorrow im not coming home till late cause im going out to look at some other possible chicas, i wont call her all day and wont let her know what im up too. God this sh1t doesnt have to happen but its either i just let it end which i dont or i manipulate the situation. I was going to just leave and sleep at my parents house tonight but that would be a little incogruent with my actions earlier tonigth of being happy, kissing her etc. Also that might really trigger her and she might fly off the handle. Im doin a little take away by sleeping on the couch and I will continually do more takeways this week to make her squirm. wihtin the next couple days im going to basically be gone when shes home.

 

[rick92f]

I always love reading posts like this, especially from people with a college degree who think they are the ****. I'm one of those people to whom you refer to as an "uneducated loser".

College was so boring that I decided to become a Soldier instead. I don't have a degree today but seem to be living just fine. 3 cars, 2 motorcycles, a house, and a six figure job. I even learned how to spell somewhere along the way and speak 3 different languages.

I'd take my discharge over your degree any day! Rant over.

Now on to business. Just walk away from this idiot. Like my Father told me, "Replace her with a younger, thinner model". I've had women find excuses to behave in an inappropriate manner due to certain circumstances. She sounds like she doesn't give a damn about anything but herself. You'll be amazed how much better you'll be all around without her there. Take care.:rockon:

 

[squirrels]

Is "92f" a reference to the Beretta pistol?

The OP's first problem is that he moved in with a girl he isn't married to, during a time in his life where he has more important things to be worried about than being distracted by some skirt being up his ass all the time.

If you haven't got the rest of your life squared away, then you shouldn't be worried about living with women.

Of course, neither of these two seem like the brightest people in the world, graduate degrees or not.

BTW, you already posted one thread about this. We don't need a second, just because you're not getting as much attention as you think you deserve.

 

[seth03]

So if being in the process of getting a masters makes someone hot ****...........what does being a physician, who has a doctorate and 6 years of post-doctoral training/education make a person? Miles Davis?

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Ok heres an update:


Im doin a little take away by sleeping on the couch...

that'll show her!

 

[Jeffst1980]

I'm sorry you're faced with this situation.

Understand that when a woman uses her unhappiness to justify something, she isn't willing to work things out. At this point, it's NOT about your job or money; it's how she FEELS. That's all the justification she needs.

Stop trying to define yourself by the car you drive or your masters' degree. Those are both rendered useless in your current situation. Rational argument is going hurt your cause with her.

Your only real option is to go no contact. She gave you an ultimatum, and those are lose/lose with a girl has the upper hand on you.

If you two weren't living together, I would say going no contact would get her calling you up and saying she was wrong, etc. in under two weeks. The problem is you live together; you can't break the lease and you have no job or money.

If money weren't a problem, the correct thing to do would be to tell her to move out immediately. The breakup has already occurred.

I think you need to consider this relationship over and figure out your money situation. When that's taken care of, you'll have a ton more options.

 

[Colossus]

Ah, our old friend AIX.

First of all, why the hell are you living with your girlfirend under a lease?? Or at all?? Read IRON RULE of TOMASSI #4. There's currently a thread about it.

Second, your relationship is already over. Anything you do from this point is only prolonging the inevitable. For whatever reason, her "not being into the relationship" is a reflection of her feelings, and she will use anything within grasp to validate those feelings--ie. you being unemployed, etc. You dont need to puff your chest about your degrees or your car because those things have no bearing on the current situation.

Here's what is happening: She is on the fence about what to do, like most women would be. She is clearly looking for a way out, but she is hesitant to leave the comfort and security a relationship offers without having another branch to swing to. Very rarely will a woman end an LTR without first having a contingency plan in effect. Women do not like being alone, and they certainly do not like a break up without someone else's arms to run to. They will usually teeter in indecision until they have found another prospect or you do something out of desperation or anger that validates her feelings.

Unfortunately for you, you live with her under a lease. This does not make your exit easy. Best of luck.

 

[decades]

move back in with your parents. regroup. get your act together. And start over. Don't make the same mistakes you made here. Read the DJ bible.

 

[aix237]

I appreciate the advice here. i know she is. she has pulled this in the past. but that was a long time ago. Everytime she would pull some sh1t like this say i need some space, i need to find myself blah blah blah. I would put up a fight and try to talk etc. she would shut down and stay hard headed for days. Then i would say fvck it and just leave her alone and shut her out. She would crack come running back and want to fix things.
So here I have a couple of options
1. I could say fvck it and tell her to get the fvck out right now for good
2. I could just act normal right now and see how she feels in a couple of days
3. I could go to my parents house for a couple of days right now and just cut her off.
4. I could go about normal somewhat but just not call her anymore at her work once a day (which is what i would do normally, call her once a day to see how things are etc.). And I could go out like tonight and simply just not come home and sleep at my friends house next to here.

4. Would probalby get her going pretty good and shell be pretty reponsive towards that.

I know shes emotional right now and could do anything. If i p1ss her off enoough by one of those optoins she could say well im moving now as opposed to waiting to see how she feels but highly doubtful.

I highly doubt she will pull the trigger regardless atleast for a while I will have to make her justify that. I think the only way for her to justify in her mind right now is to smother her and keep bringing it up. If i disappear here and there be abnormal etc. it should work.
Its sick that shes responsive when i shut her out. Every morning she comes to me and kisses me goodbye when im in bed. This morning i purposely covered my head in sheets, which I never do. well she still came over tapped me and kissed my goodbye. Lol if i wasnt covered she probably wouldve just walked out to work.

Im highly debating going out tonight, not coming home, then going to my parents house for a couple of days and isolating her. She could get mad but she should just feel like she needs to fix things.

 

[PeeGee]

She's controlling the frame and I'm gathering from other posts that you are financially dependent on her, because you are in between jobs (?)

You need to always set the frame so that you have the option. If she can run around doing childish things and you'll take her back, you are going to train her to think that this is acceptable behaviour.

 

[aix237]

No I am not dependent on her for money. I asked once and that was it and I gave it back to her the next day.

Yea im going to dissappear espically tonight. See what she does.

 

[DJDamage]

If you put your hand inside a bee hive and you get stung who do you blame? the bees who are instinctively defending their hive?! no it is you who is to blame.

End your relationship with this girl and she will stop being a b1tch. Continue to play games with her and it will be your downfall.

 

[jophil28]

Im highly debating going out tonight, not coming home, then going to my parents house for a couple of days and isolating her. She could get mad but she should just feel like she needs to fix things.

This is reactive behavior and she will probably know that it is exactly that.
These kinds of reactions rarely fix anything. Instead they tend to perpetuate, or even increase the level of drama instead of resolving it.
If I were in your position, I would say to her that you acknowlege her feelings of discontent and that your relationship is at the crossroads.
IN you position, I would 'suggest' that she move out for one month to give HER time and an opportunity to work on HER feelings without the distraction of being around you.
THis approach puts the onus on her to 'own' her own emotional instability.

You have a common problem here and, in a nutshell, you are with a woman who is consumed by her own whims, wants and feelings. She wants the world to change( that means you) to make HER feel better.
THis is how most women are. They detach themselves from a problem in their relationship, baitch to everyone behind your back about it and then slide it across to you for a solution. Extra pressure is applied by her suggesting that the future of the relationship /marriage depends on you delivering the outcome that she wants...so she then stands back and watches you get all lathered up about it .

Women who operate like this do so because it usually works.
The way to counter this is not to play.
Mention how you realise that she is upset, and that she should take time out to examine her own feelings.
Stop apologising, stop making half a$$ed promises to appease her, and start being responsible for YOUR own stuff, not hers.

 

[aix237]

I know its my fault and I told her thtat plenty of times. Im going to leave her a note tonight to be respectful and say Im going out and sleeping at my friends house I need to clear my head and you can have your space.

 

[vitor]

SO you do not have a job? Or she does not have a job? Who is paying the bills?

Bottom Line, this is over, move out, move on...

 

[MattS]

adsf

 

[aix237]

Well last night I went out couldve fvcked this girl but decided to go home instead. This morning she gave me a kiss a goodbye. Then I called her later on and she answered. We talked and i said lets go to dinner tonight. She said see thats what I mean your not being frugile. I was like wtf. So then we got into us. Basically it comes down to shes on the fence still and is almost set in her ways of wanting to be alone. I said go do it then. She said well talk about later cause shes at work.

I texted like an hour later and said: youre right go be irrational by yourself or with someone else. youre on the fence about wanting to try to see what happens with us. It doesnt make sense then for u to be in my world anymore. u should go stay with someone else until u find a new place. im not leaving here. The rent you owe is for june and july ill take from august on. Im done with ur bull**** so figure your **** out.

 

[DJDamage]

Hey why do you have 2 accounts?! one day you are Matt and another you are aix?!

Busted.

 

[aix237]

lol wow big deal hahaha. Damn dude you got anything else to do besides sosuave and policing people with 2 accounts

 

[DJDamage]

lol wow big deal hahaha. Damn dude you got anything else to do besides sosuave and policing people with 2 accounts

No need to policing, I just called it as I saw it in this thread. If it wasn't a big deal then why hide that fact?!