my friends suck. ( how do i set better boundaries)

[Packers2010]

last night I got a call from one of my friends. She says that her and some friends are smoking weed and that she will come and get me.

things have been so stressed out for me lately. I have a test on Monday followed by 3 fillings at the dentist on Tuesday (witch I am 50$ short for, have to get on a payment plan or something. i also forgot to mention I have a fear of hospitals / procedures) then on Wednesday I have another test. so I told her to pick me up.

so when she picks me up I meet her friend and she needs to pee so I let her use my pisser. so once we get in the car to go get the weed, my friend starts to bag me out for some reason. She says some crap about me not being able to get a girl, telling everyone in the car how I haven’t had sex in ages and how I used to have oneities for this girl . I didn't say anything to it because i was like” what? Um.. ok :S”
( my thinking is she did this so I wouldn’t hit on her friends or whatever)

It was just after I met this new girl so I couldn't really do **** now with her because i was already done. ( later i found out she had a bf so it didn't matter)

So we get this weed go back to her house and smoke most of it. I don't have weed often so I bug out a little and i start going crazy. I just zoned out when I smoke weed, Which is what I wanted. Just to be present to the moment. ( I’m thinking of starting meditation instead of smoking weed)

later on, my friends bf tells me that I’m actually not there friend. I am just there for " comic relief" since I’m so funny on weed ( I was pretty shocked he would say this, though I don’t like him to much anyway .) I didn't say anything at this point because I was so baked I couldn't move. lol.

they also started throwing **** at me witch freaked me out to fook.

My question is this:
How would I go about setting better boundaries with my friends? I've decided that they pretty much don't respect me so I’m not going to be there friend anymore. Plus I was only using them for the free weed anyway.

What do you guys think?

 

[backseatjuan]

I see this is your second post you crying. Weed is good, but just like booze it is not for everyone. I'm getting at that you probably got a low after your high.

Switch drugs, white is good if you do it rarely, or don't do drugs, do sports.

 

[Packers2010]

I see this is your second post you crying. Weed is good, but just like booze it is not for everyone. I'm getting at that you probably got a low after your high.

Switch drugs, white is good if you do it rarely, or don't do drugs, do sports.

what do you mean i am crying?

 

[Crissco]

I see this is your second post you crying. Weed is good, but just like booze it is not for everyone. I'm getting at that you probably got a low after your high.

Switch drugs, white is good if you do it rarely, or don't do drugs, do sports.

Are you really telling this kid to hop on blow, wtf is wrong with u?


OP - Stick to sports, make new friends, have a goal in mind and achieve it.

These guys arent friends, there acquaintances. Make new friends.

 

[flashpoint]

How would I go about setting better boundaries with my friends? I've decided that they pretty much don't respect me so I’m not going to be there friend anymore. Plus I was only using them for the free weed anyway.

What do you guys think?

THEY ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. before you leave this toxic environment tho you should fock this dumb biatch just to spite her and her stupid BF.

 

[Desdinova]

Moved to AE...

 

[Packers2010]

THEY ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. before you leave this toxic environment tho you should fock this dumb biatch just to spite her and her stupid BF.

think of your perfect 10 hb then picture the exact opposite of that.

thats who this girl is.. so there is no point in focking her.. plus he bf could snap and kill a bunch of people at any moment.

so next time they call me.. i am just not going to pic up

 

[user43770]

think of your perfect 10 hb then picture the exact opposite of that.

thats who this girl is.. so there is no point in focking her.. plus he bf could snap and kill a bunch of people at any moment.

so next time they call me.. i am just not going to pic up

You have the right idea, bud. Don't surround yourself with people who don't respect you.

 

[Scars]

Make new friends, ones that will respect you. Hanging around people that just bring you down is counter productive.

-Scars

 

[Bible_Belt]

What do you guys think?

I think the real problem is that you need approval. You have a need to be liked, and that is what makes you so easy to rip on and offend. That's why you didn't fight back when you got bullied. You were too afraid that fighting back might make them not like you. So you don't, but then the problem just gets worse, and they respect you less and less.

One thing I can't stand is a bully. And something I've learned about bullies is that they come in both genders. Girls bully other girls, and they also bully guys. But they do it with words, not physical force. Everything else about the dynamic is the same. You have to fight back, or it never ends. The bully is just trying to see how long it takes that to happen.

If it was a bigger, stronger guy who was physically pushing you around, I'd tell you to kick him in the nuts. And if it's a woman, you do the same thing...with words.

When she says "...some crap about me not being able to get a girl, telling everyone in the car how I haven’t had sex in ages and how I used to have oneities for this girl...

You say something like:

Me and Mister Hand don't need your tuna box, thank you very much. We're just here for the weed.

What's the worst that could happen? You lose the friendship of people who insult you? You don't get to fvck a girl you're not going to fvck anyway? Or at least, the girl you're not going to get until you learn to stand up for yourself and not need approval from others.

 

[FairShake]

Everybody else nailed it (other than the coke guy).

Fvck them. Go find some nerds or hippies who respect you and add value to make your life better. Forget about people who try to make their time better by making your time worse.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

last night I got a call from one of my friends.

Here's an easy solution:

STOP ANSWERING YOUR PHONE.

If you want to do something, call some friends. If they call you, let it go to voicemail. Then see if you're interested.

This one simple trick will give you TONS of freedom. Pretty soon all the "crap" friends will be weeded out.

also read this book:

When I Say No I Feel Guilty

 

[ThunderMaverick]

It's best you move on and find some new friends through school, work, and hobbies. You've already established that you're the "comic relief" with these people, so it's hard to make them believe otherwise, unless you don't give into their incessant bagging and nagging. Sometimes if you walk away while they do that and don't call or pick up your phone for a while they'll get the idea.

Here's what I would suggest, and it's ALWAYS worked for me in getting people to change the way they treat me: Walk away, send a short text saying "I can't be around people who disrespect me, apologize and don't do it again"

They either don't call back (it's a very good thing) or they call back and apologize. But don't fall for "Just suck it up man it's jokes!" BS. You want them to treat you how you want to be treated. Don't settle for less.

 

[Alle_Gory]

Are you really telling this kid to hop on blow, wtf is wrong with u?

It looks like backseatjuan is recommending the kid try cocaine.

I see this is your second post you crying. Weed is good, but just like booze it is not for everyone. I'm getting at that you probably got a low after your high.

Switch drugs, white is good if you do it rarely, or don't do drugs, do sports.

Probably high on crack right now, or did you switch to something else. Meth? Krokodil? You still alive? Guess not. Oh well that's a shame.

last night I got a call from one of my friends. She says that her and some friends are smoking weed and that she will come and get me.

Kind of a problem there. Guess why.

my friend starts to bag me out for some reason. She says some crap about me not being able to get a girl, telling everyone in the car how I haven’t had sex in ages and how I used to have oneities for this girl . I didn't say anything to it because i was like” what? Um.. ok :S”
( my thinking is she did this so I wouldn’t hit on her friends or whatever)

Doesn't matter why she did this. You can try and understand her later, in the meantime you need to tell her to STFU. Stand your ground.

later on, my friends bf tells me that I’m actually not there friend. I am just there for " comic relief" since I’m so funny on weed ( I was pretty shocked he would say this, though I don’t like him to much anyway .) I didn't say anything at this point because I was so baked I couldn't move. lol.

they also started throwing **** at me witch freaked me out to fook.

My question is this:
How would I go about setting better boundaries with my friends? I've decided that they pretty much don't respect me so I’m not going to be there friend anymore. Plus I was only using them for the free weed anyway.

What do you guys think?

I think you need to tell them to fvck off. Literally. Next time she asks you to hang out.

"**** off." No reason, no understanding, nothing. It's a little too late for that. You are literally a clown and you can never get respect from these people again because you already gave it away.

 

[don't]

only idiots try to alter their minds chemically.