I ran into The Rational Male on the web and found myself intrigued, to say the least. I ended up listening to the audiobook version and then looking up articles on the website. I don't agree with everything presented, but man, a hell of a lot did make sense. And I'll tell you why.
Over the last couple years I've gotten too annoyed at the one-sided relationships that most American girls desire in a marriage. I was a beta, but recognized that something was off about it. I saw all the unhappiness in the marriages around me. I saw men dragged through the mud in divorce proceedings. Women praised for adultery, while men's lives were destroyed. I saw men give up everything they love to be with a woman who was emotionally manipulative and controlling.
The good news is, I noticed this, and knew I didn't want it. So whenever a girl started acting that way, I would just leave the relationship. I was hoping to find a girl that would not be insane. What occurred to me is that most of American girls are indoctrinated by the media and their social circles to act this way, and I should probably look for a girl outside the country. This has had pretty amazing success, but the lashback is incredible. And that's what I really connected with.
Here's my question to go along with my story - how do you handle people that challenge your desire to have a relationship based on genuine desire? One of actual mutual respect?
I am dating a woman from the Philippines who has two desires in life - please her husband (not just sexually), and be a devoted mother. These are common goals of women from this country. They are loyal, eager to please, hardworking, and want a loving husband. I made a mysoginist joke to her once. In her country where she lives, they wash their laundry by hand which takes hours to complete. I said, "When you move here with me, you will have all the time in the world instead of doing laundry. I'll have to make a chore list for you to stay busy!" She smiled and said, "That would be great!"
I related this story to my parents, who in turn related the story to the other women in the extended family over the Christmas holidays. They actually approached me and said, "This is not okay!" I was confused. What's not okay? I asked the question, and they said, "You can't have your own little slave girl!" And that's when I realized just how correct Tomassi was. Not only should men be the only ones with "honey-do" lists, but women actually are threatened at a woman who would feel the opposite. And they have to /speak out against it/.
I work and make plenty of money, if I were to marry this Philippino woman, she would have more than she ever wanted in life. She could go to school if she wanted. She would have a much better life. She would be happy, fulfilling her natural desires. I wouldn't be slaving her around the house - the relationship would be equal, in that our roles might be different, but we both contribute. She'd do chores while at home, and I'll be at work. When I come home, I would handle the tasks generally associated with men. There's nothing wrong with this. Unless you're a feminist.
I also recently had a run-in with a singles forum I frequent (which I won't be a part of for much longer), where I talked about the idea of the "creep". I pointed out that women are as superficial as men, and are much more forgiving of a man being a "creep" if he is handsome. I was berated. Not only by women, but by men defending women. I was told that I'm just a loser who can't get women to sleep with him. To even suggest that women are superficial was the worst possible thing I could have done.
So what do you guys do? Just live your life happily and let them ridicule you? Have you been able to open others eyes to what you're doing? My journey was purely my own, no one pointed any of this out to me, I just have been discovering it along the way.
Thanks in advance for the discussion!
Over the last couple years I've gotten too annoyed at the one-sided relationships that most American girls desire in a marriage. I was a beta, but recognized that something was off about it. I saw all the unhappiness in the marriages around me. I saw men dragged through the mud in divorce proceedings. Women praised for adultery, while men's lives were destroyed. I saw men give up everything they love to be with a woman who was emotionally manipulative and controlling.
The good news is, I noticed this, and knew I didn't want it. So whenever a girl started acting that way, I would just leave the relationship. I was hoping to find a girl that would not be insane. What occurred to me is that most of American girls are indoctrinated by the media and their social circles to act this way, and I should probably look for a girl outside the country. This has had pretty amazing success, but the lashback is incredible. And that's what I really connected with.
Here's my question to go along with my story - how do you handle people that challenge your desire to have a relationship based on genuine desire? One of actual mutual respect?
I am dating a woman from the Philippines who has two desires in life - please her husband (not just sexually), and be a devoted mother. These are common goals of women from this country. They are loyal, eager to please, hardworking, and want a loving husband. I made a mysoginist joke to her once. In her country where she lives, they wash their laundry by hand which takes hours to complete. I said, "When you move here with me, you will have all the time in the world instead of doing laundry. I'll have to make a chore list for you to stay busy!" She smiled and said, "That would be great!"
I related this story to my parents, who in turn related the story to the other women in the extended family over the Christmas holidays. They actually approached me and said, "This is not okay!" I was confused. What's not okay? I asked the question, and they said, "You can't have your own little slave girl!" And that's when I realized just how correct Tomassi was. Not only should men be the only ones with "honey-do" lists, but women actually are threatened at a woman who would feel the opposite. And they have to /speak out against it/.
I work and make plenty of money, if I were to marry this Philippino woman, she would have more than she ever wanted in life. She could go to school if she wanted. She would have a much better life. She would be happy, fulfilling her natural desires. I wouldn't be slaving her around the house - the relationship would be equal, in that our roles might be different, but we both contribute. She'd do chores while at home, and I'll be at work. When I come home, I would handle the tasks generally associated with men. There's nothing wrong with this. Unless you're a feminist.
I also recently had a run-in with a singles forum I frequent (which I won't be a part of for much longer), where I talked about the idea of the "creep". I pointed out that women are as superficial as men, and are much more forgiving of a man being a "creep" if he is handsome. I was berated. Not only by women, but by men defending women. I was told that I'm just a loser who can't get women to sleep with him. To even suggest that women are superficial was the worst possible thing I could have done.
So what do you guys do? Just live your life happily and let them ridicule you? Have you been able to open others eyes to what you're doing? My journey was purely my own, no one pointed any of this out to me, I just have been discovering it along the way.
Thanks in advance for the discussion!