I've had some amazing problems that I prefer not to discuss. But about 2-3 months ago the best thing happened to me. Don't get me wrong, my game was good and my life was alright, but my depression would hit me hardcore and randomly effect all areas of my life. Anti-depressants were useless, no matter what mg.
I went on a cycle, gaining a ****load of strength. All my problems were gone: I felt like my workouts were finally WORTH it and my 4x a week visits weren't a waste of my time. I stopped drinking completely and became more alert and focused on my schoolwork improving my grades. I became a bouncer and had the time to train in combat because my schoolwork was always done. AND, my body looked absolutely amazing, causing every hot lady in the club scene to always looking my way. Now I'm dating the hottest bartender in my club.
Now, my confidence is failing and the downfall is bringing me back. I'm drinking more, my grades are falling, my body and weight (especially my chest) is deflating, I can't get my schedule right, and I'm only still dating this girl because I don't spew my feelings and problems to her (like I am now).
I'm decided on Anadrol and after my 8 week off period is complete, back on to Sustanon, then finally these estrogen blockers and something else (dunno the name) that holds your weight and gains. This includes that GNC milk stuff that keeps your kidneys healthy. I want to be back where I was, never to do roids again. This isn't an addiction, it's an attempt to return to my state of mind where I no longer needed to the feeling of having to prove myself- a feeling that I've never been able to produce on my own.
Opinions? (please from no gay oh drugs will ruin your life people). I'd rather live a short life then a long miserable one (not saying I'm trying, just that if it comes down to it...). I've tried many different routines and having an ectomorphic body type, my muscles take 4x as long to develop.
I went on a cycle, gaining a ****load of strength. All my problems were gone: I felt like my workouts were finally WORTH it and my 4x a week visits weren't a waste of my time. I stopped drinking completely and became more alert and focused on my schoolwork improving my grades. I became a bouncer and had the time to train in combat because my schoolwork was always done. AND, my body looked absolutely amazing, causing every hot lady in the club scene to always looking my way. Now I'm dating the hottest bartender in my club.
Now, my confidence is failing and the downfall is bringing me back. I'm drinking more, my grades are falling, my body and weight (especially my chest) is deflating, I can't get my schedule right, and I'm only still dating this girl because I don't spew my feelings and problems to her (like I am now).
I'm decided on Anadrol and after my 8 week off period is complete, back on to Sustanon, then finally these estrogen blockers and something else (dunno the name) that holds your weight and gains. This includes that GNC milk stuff that keeps your kidneys healthy. I want to be back where I was, never to do roids again. This isn't an addiction, it's an attempt to return to my state of mind where I no longer needed to the feeling of having to prove myself- a feeling that I've never been able to produce on my own.
Opinions? (please from no gay oh drugs will ruin your life people). I'd rather live a short life then a long miserable one (not saying I'm trying, just that if it comes down to it...). I've tried many different routines and having an ectomorphic body type, my muscles take 4x as long to develop.