Not So Easy Rider
Don Juan
While I have only been an active member for a short time, I have browsed this website quite some time before. Naturally, I found that some problems in the threads here stem from a lack of confidence, assertivness or that Alpha male aura. I used to lack these things and often preffered to be left alone rather than having to hassel with anyone (ahh, silent solitude). Well, this changed; here are some things that brought out my Alpha spirit. It's in there, just find your switch.
- Your mental image:
In your mind, what are you? I never thought much about what I view myself as (my brother told me this and left it to me to figure out) till I was browsing around the TV and saw some documentary on WW2. The video clip I remember the most and also serves as my mental image is the front of a Royal Navy Battleship as it crashed through the North Sea. It doesn't sound impressive, but really, you could get a feeling of it's power. It was like Godzilla lurching through the waves. Sometimes, for whatever reason, when I feel nervious or uncomfortable, I think of the might and power that ship had. My head= the turrents, my body is the hull and my arms are the cannons.
-Your theme song:
I think I hear what your saying. "Theme song? This isn't TV or even sane." As far as sanity is concered, I believe i'm alright; but anyways, having a theme for me most certainly doesn't hurt. In my case, just plain and simple: Darth Vader's theme. If there was ever a song that was made to demonstrate power, that's it (my opinion only). Don't groove with the Vader beat? then whatever gives your that feeling "i'm the boss". Don't sing it, just have it in your mind.
-Stand tall
Someone else here mentioned this and I wish to only re-emphasize it. Walking around at my campus, I see plenty of guys hunched over and/or looking at the ground. Call me cold or whatever, but that just looks pitiful. I doubt they all have reasons (emotional, medical or otherwise), so I can only guess that they just are not in the habit of standing tall. Keep the back sorta straight, the head back and the chin up. We are humans, not cave-men.
-Move like you have a purpose.
Jeeze, my Lt. always harassed me about this. He told me that I walked and looked like I was neutured. Arg, I hated that way of putting it, but it got the idea across (eventually). When you walk, look like you know what you are doing (even if you aren't). Don't be so hesitant, reserved or shy. I'm sorry, I really can't explain it or even say how you can tell for yourself. I learned it out of embarrassment (and probably a bit of anger too over that neutured remark).
-Pride
Be proud of who you are and what you do. If people don't like you for rather stupid reasons, to hell with them. Don't try to appease everybody (not possible) or even a majority. With me, some perp doesn't like the way I am, thats fine. If I don't have people who don't like me, then i'm doing something wrong.
Well, this is my confidence outline. Hope it serves some of you well. l tried to answer everything as best I could. If you don't like my ideas, then try something else. This isn't "the way" and I am not Budda.
Let me add, I have found that I can befriend women quite easily since I formulated this confidence of mine. Granted, I cannot take it to the next step whether by flaw in this method or lack of DJ ability; but I find they are more affable towards me (whereas before I would just be plain avoided).
- Your mental image:
In your mind, what are you? I never thought much about what I view myself as (my brother told me this and left it to me to figure out) till I was browsing around the TV and saw some documentary on WW2. The video clip I remember the most and also serves as my mental image is the front of a Royal Navy Battleship as it crashed through the North Sea. It doesn't sound impressive, but really, you could get a feeling of it's power. It was like Godzilla lurching through the waves. Sometimes, for whatever reason, when I feel nervious or uncomfortable, I think of the might and power that ship had. My head= the turrents, my body is the hull and my arms are the cannons.
-Your theme song:
I think I hear what your saying. "Theme song? This isn't TV or even sane." As far as sanity is concered, I believe i'm alright; but anyways, having a theme for me most certainly doesn't hurt. In my case, just plain and simple: Darth Vader's theme. If there was ever a song that was made to demonstrate power, that's it (my opinion only). Don't groove with the Vader beat? then whatever gives your that feeling "i'm the boss". Don't sing it, just have it in your mind.
-Stand tall
Someone else here mentioned this and I wish to only re-emphasize it. Walking around at my campus, I see plenty of guys hunched over and/or looking at the ground. Call me cold or whatever, but that just looks pitiful. I doubt they all have reasons (emotional, medical or otherwise), so I can only guess that they just are not in the habit of standing tall. Keep the back sorta straight, the head back and the chin up. We are humans, not cave-men.
-Move like you have a purpose.
Jeeze, my Lt. always harassed me about this. He told me that I walked and looked like I was neutured. Arg, I hated that way of putting it, but it got the idea across (eventually). When you walk, look like you know what you are doing (even if you aren't). Don't be so hesitant, reserved or shy. I'm sorry, I really can't explain it or even say how you can tell for yourself. I learned it out of embarrassment (and probably a bit of anger too over that neutured remark).
-Pride
Be proud of who you are and what you do. If people don't like you for rather stupid reasons, to hell with them. Don't try to appease everybody (not possible) or even a majority. With me, some perp doesn't like the way I am, thats fine. If I don't have people who don't like me, then i'm doing something wrong.
Well, this is my confidence outline. Hope it serves some of you well. l tried to answer everything as best I could. If you don't like my ideas, then try something else. This isn't "the way" and I am not Budda.
Let me add, I have found that I can befriend women quite easily since I formulated this confidence of mine. Granted, I cannot take it to the next step whether by flaw in this method or lack of DJ ability; but I find they are more affable towards me (whereas before I would just be plain avoided).