My car got towed and I feel really guilty for taking her money. Is there any reason to even give it

thatfeel

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So after deciding how to handle last night:

original thread:https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/3ne1l1/girl_asked_to_push_date_back_then_asks_to/

I ended up hanging with the girl and the friend. It worked out nicely as I was able to isolate her to her place. We had sex, etc. After that I took her back to her friend's apartment where we went to the bar after. Except, I drove her friend's car and left mine at the apartment.

Little did I know that I mistakenly did not park in guest parking and got towed. Total? 283.20. Last time i'll ever make that mistake, but here's the thing. My date was like "god that sucks, I'll give you some cash". She gave me 100 bucks and a stern "next time please don't park in permit parking". I felt like such a total douche.

I thought it was a nice gesture that she gave me money to help cover it but in all honesty, it's not her problem, it's not her fault, and, I feel pretty guilty about taking the money. As I got out of her car to go pay for the fee I left the money in the dash and she said "don't forget your money" and I said, "I really can't accept it, it's not your problem nor your responsibility. I should take responsibility for my actions." to which she replied "You should take it, I feel bad because you didn't even want to go to the bar last night".

Instead of standing there arguing with her, I just decided to take it. But I'll still laden with guilt. I'm thinking of just flat out texting her tomorrow and saying "Anon, I really cannot accept the money you gave me. It's an awesome favor, etc etc, and one that you especially don't owe me, but, I have to take a stand for character and relinquish it back to you. I hope you understand".

I mean the obvious answer is "if you feel guilty you should do it". Would I be gaining any favor with her in the context of LTR potential? Because right now I'm not sure if she's into me that way yet.

Also, the meaning of the "is there any even reason to give it back" clause is me wondering if the damage is already done to my image by accepting the dosh...
 
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Skyline

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Some guys spend over $100 on their date and never see that money again. She basically "split the bill" to speak.

I wouldn't worry about, and calm down about your image. If she was so upset she wouldn't have offered you anything.
 

fastlife

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Honestly, if a girl's really into you she wants to be the one investing in you. She's demonstrating that she perceives you as a high value male--trying to give it back to her is basically rejection; telling her '**** you. Your investment wasn't good enough for me.'

This is the kind of thing you should be expecting from women. But you're not used to it, you're dealing with years of feminine conditioning, etc.

If you really want to, use that money to buy her an experience--whitewater rafting, a nice dinner, etc. Look at it as relationship capital. Then you can say "Look, I felt bad about taking your money the other day. Wanted to make it up to you." At that point, she'll see that as you appreciating her investment for what it was.
 

bigneil

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Let her do things for you. But return the favor. And I don't mean a $100 date, I mean a $201 date.
 

Maximus Rex

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Little did I know that I mistakenly did not park in guest parking and got towed. Total? 283.20. Last time i'll ever make that mistake, but here's the thing. My date was like "god that sucks, I'll give you some cash". She gave me 100 bucks and a stern "next time please don't park in permit parking". I felt like such a total douche.

I thought it was a nice gesture that she gave me money to help cover it but in all honesty, it's not her problem, it's not her fault, and, I feel pretty guilty about taking the money. As I got out of her car to go pay for the fee I left the money in the dash and she said "don't forget your money" and I said, "I really can't accept it, it's not your problem nor your responsibility. I should take responsibility for my actions." to which she replied "You should take it, I feel bad because you didn't even want to go to the bar last night". Instead of standing there arguing with her, I just decided to take it. But I'll still laden with guilt
She Just Liked Me

I'm thinking of just flat out texting her tomorrow and saying "Anon, I really cannot accept the money you gave me. It's an awesome favor, etc etc, and one that you especially don't owe me, but, I have to take a stand for character and relinquish it back to you. I hope you understand".
(EXCLUSIVE) Behind The Scenes Footage w/ Payroll Da Pimp-Go to :42-2:00 of the clip.

I have to take a stand for character and relinquish it back to you. I hope you understand".

Give the money back???

Also, the meaning of the "is there any even reason to give it back" clause is me wondering if the damage is already done to my image by accepting the dosh...
I want you to watch those clips a few times so you can soak up the game that Rosebudd and Payroll were droppin' especially Rosebudd. Women are cheap as f*ck and they don't just extend themselves to just anybody. Ole girl is emotionally invested in you and here's the part that you're not realizing, not only did she want you to have the dough, she felt that you were worthy enough to receive it. If you came at with that "I have to take a stand for character," bullsh*t, you're going to fail her sh*t test and destroy that alpha male image that you've worked so hard to build. This is what she wants you to do.

American Pimp - 1 of 9 go to 7:00-7:27

Ole girl proved herself to be down chick so she should be rewarded accordingly. Take her to dinner and the movies, a cool little spot downtown, give her a box of



or if doesn't cost too much




and be sure it's a half a dozen or the roses are pink or yellow. Pink signifies love, gratitude or appreciation, while yellow signifies friendship, joy, and good health.
 
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Atom Smasher

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You feel "laden with guilt", as you say, because you need to impress thatfeel.

Given your own sensibilities about this particular issue, if I were you I'd give her the $100, say simply, "I really do appreciate it. But it was my responsibility" and nothing more. No need to mention character as you suggested because actions speak much louder than anything you can say. You have decided, and this is how it will be.

Having done this, you will have impressed thatfeel and elevated him to a new level of self-respect. As an aside, you will have demonstrated leadership and decisiveness both to yourself and to her. This is an opportunity.
 
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