Mr. NON-JUAN Post: How to Appear Like a Non-Sexual Being

Mr. Non-Juan

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Mr. NON-JUAN : Teaching Men How to Become Bad with Women, One Guy at a Time
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Greetings, readers! My name is Mr. Non-Juan! Thank you for reading this post!

I only have one goal: helping you become better with women... by showing you how to LOSE them!!

If you are someone who is great with women yet doesn't know how to get that one girl off your back, I'm the guy to help you out! If you're a guy who just can't figure out why what you are doing isn't helping you get the girl you want, I'm the guy who can better explain it to you, then encourage you to continue doing it!

And, if you're a guy who wants to learn how to be a mack with the ladies... well, you might want to go to one of those other love doctors out there, ‘cause THAT AIN'T ME, pal!!

Oh yeah – check out the first chapter of my e-book by going here: www.xanga.com/mrnonjuan!!
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Today’s topic:
HOW TO APPEAR LIKE A NON-SEXUAL BEING

When women think about the kind of guys they want, what qualities do you think they look for?

Obviously, there are various physical qualities some women look for - big muscles, nice looking chest, fairly decent shape, etc. - but for women, the physical qualities aren't nearly as important as how a man makes a woman FEEL.

In short, women go after guys who they think will be able to make them feel ALIVE when in bed.

And in order for a woman to think this way about a man, they must assume, based on the behavior they see him displaying, that the man is, in fact, a sexual being to some degree.

Now, this is all well and good to know for the guy that wants to get with a woman... but what about aspiring Non-Juans??

As a Non-Juan-in-training, it is important to remember one simple rule of thumb...

Non-Juans are NON-SEXUAL BEINGS!! :down: (After all, if you're doing everything right that you can to see to it that girls are staying away from you, the LAST thing you should EVER be getting is SEX.)

The hardest part about being a Non-Juan is that despite everything you do, occasionally there will be some girl out there who, unbeknownst to you, has developed a crush on you. And THIS IS NOT A GOOD THING. If she has developed any sort of feelings for you at all, it means that in some teeny-tiny corner of her mind....

SHE'S THINKING ABOUT YOU SEXUALLY!!!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! :eek:

So, what can you do to make sure that no girls EVER look at you in a lusting-type way? Here are some handy things to keep in mind with you when you're out and about town:

(1) Never ever, ever, EVER talk about sex. Ever.

Not even in the smallest of ways.

If a girl asks you if her backside looks big in her pair of jeans, DO-NOT-ANSWER-THE-QUESTION!!

What's going to happen if you answer that question? She's going to think: "wow, I got him thinking about my @$$ - I wonder if he's thinking about other parts of my body?" This is only going to make her more turned on about the idea of her and you together.

BIG MISTAKE!!

(2) ALWAYS talk to girls about topics as FAR AWAY FROM SEX as possible.

Talk about things that will make you look like either (a) a nerd, or (b) an unexciting doofball.

If you're going the nerd route, talk about things nerds usually talk about - Star Wars, Lord of The Rings, or any of the 3000 nerdy-type board games nerds usually play.

If you want to appear unexciting, talk about trips to the doctor's office, or tending to your ant farm - ANYTHING that will help a girl think to herself: "wow - this loser doesn't do ANY activities that would get MY juices flowing!!"

(3) Do NOT work out at a gym. Ever. :box:

Even if you are doing (1) and (2), a girl may think you're hiding your sexual self if she sees your muscles. I don't know if you've noticed, but muscles tend to excite women, and as a Non-Juan you do NOT want that to happen!!

Try to increase your carb intake so you become a fat slob. If you have a high metabolism and are skinny, don't try to lift any type of dumbbells or do any push-ups - they only help to make you tone and defined. Instead, stick to the ribs-popping-out-of-my-chest look that helps to draw a girl's focus away from YOU, and onto the NEXT man that walks by!

Follow these rules, and TRUST me: the next time a girl walks by you or talks to you, you will go from being that guy she thought could "rock her world" to the guy that's not even on her list of stand-bys!! :rockon:

That's all for now!! Don't forget - www.xanga.com/mrnonjuan !!

-Mr. Non-Juan
 

James Bondage

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I bet your life is great.

Can you believe he's selling this stuff for $14.99?! and... someone is bidding?!

:eek:

God help us all.
 

James Bondage

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Seriously man... I just checked out your MySpace thing and you confess that you are an expert at 'getting women to run away from you'.

What I don't understand is that you have clearly found this site and surely have read the DJ Bible so you must know what TO do with girls... so are you gonna give up and just accept your 'fate' as a 'non-juan'?! Or try and aspire to become a DJ??

You can do it man.. I'm sure all the guys on here would be more than willing to help you out if you decide to take this path.

And please don't say 'I'm too ugly/skinny' or 'I've always been bad with ladies'... whatever the problem is you can rectify it.

So we will be behind you if you choose to do this, but if not.. all I can say is, um, good luck?!?

:confused:
 

Nighthawk

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Are you all ****ing morons? It's a joke, and a pretty funny one. More please.
 

James Bondage

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No, this guy is confessing he is a loser with women and has created this 'product' to try and cash in on his lack of success, thereby salvaging something from it I guess. He is definitely for real.

It is intended to be humorous.. but please.. this is what you call a 'funny joke'?! Geez... I hope I never get invited to a dinner party at your house.
 

thefonz

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Originally posted by Nighthawk
Are you all ****ing morons? It's a joke, and a pretty funny one. More please.
And may I add, another component to getting chicks is to NOT TAKE EVERYTHING SO SERIOUSLY
 

Double

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haha man your funny as hell......this is way more interesting than reading that boring stuff about what women want. keep on posting man........how about a new relationship answer reader question newsletter? funny ****
 

James Bondage

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this is way more interesting than reading that boring stuff about what women want
Yeah who cares about all that stupid stuff??

:confused:

(I'm really not trying to p*ss people off here lol. I'm done now)
 

NINJA PIMP

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Yall are tripping.

This is a GREAT list of what not to do. Do the exact opposite of everything he says and you have your Don.
 
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