moved to a new city

[starting over]

Whats up fellas? This is a good board it is also a good thing that everyone is helping others get to where they want to be. Well my question is this, has anyone moved to a new city at the age of 27 and completly started over and if so how did you make this work. I have been here for a month and have tried to go to bars the past couple of nights but its very diffrent because I am used to going with a group of friends. So it is very diffrent when I go by myself.
I know people from my job and I have went out with a couple of them but most of the time they do not have the same days off that I do. I am trying to force myself to be more outgoing so I can meet people. Women, I have never been that good at meeting the ladies I usually just get lucky every once in a while which I know is something I have to work on but I am concentrating on meeting people in general instead of meeting a girl friend. Any ideas or tips from you guys would be appreciated.

 

[decades]

9 years ago I moved to new york alone. It was tough. What I did was join a tai chi school. you don't have to do this. but try and find a school or gym where you will meet the same people, a group, who go to class over and over. I met some great people there.

try and avoid bars. I did the bar thing and wish I hadn't but it was a need. I am now over that need. but when you stop and think about it, bars aren't great places, and bad things can happen in bars.

try craigslist to meet people. look for free events. look for lectures and classes from the local colleges. try sports. when you are alone exercise and do things outside. go for walks. go to the parks and just read. keep pushing forward and you will find community.

the answers aren't in the bars. I have been there done that and can tell you the answers are elsewhere. I rarely go into a bar. Try Internet groups that link you up to others or meet up with others. Use the Internet to make contacts. you can do it. good for you man for taking a risk.

regards

 

[starting over]

Persistant exaction, thanks for the advice. I have been considering a martial art because I do enjoy that kind of thing. The bar thing, I did this because I just wanted to get out and about. It is not really my thing anymore I feel as if I grew out of that a couple of years ago. I will most likely go every once and a while but not all the time. I will try going to diffrent clubs and parks and I believe that this will help. This relocating by myself is tougher than what I thought. It is definatly a test of my inner strength, but I know that I will come out on top. Thanks for the advice man.

 

[Cableguy]

May I suggest you try salsa or swing lessons. I don't know if you dig dancing, but this is something I've been wanting to do. You'll meet alot of people and and get some great exercise. Good luck bro!

 

[starting over]

Cableguy, I have actually considered taking salsa lessons and even swing because I am a horrible dancer. Truth is I think that it would be a great way to meet women.

 

[Cableguy]

Cableguy, I have actually considered taking salsa lessons and even swing because I am a horrible dancer. Truth is I think that it would be a great way to meet women.

Someone had a great post on here about his adventures taking swing lessons. You will definitely meet some women. Classes in my area are starting up in January and I'm really looking forward to it.

 

[decades]

starting over, you will be amazed at how many people in a city are doing exactly what you are doing. they tend to find each other.

take a part of every day and do some Internet searching of your city for adult education classes groups clubs, etc. For example, where I live there is a group called the road runners. this is a huge running group that sponsors classes where females out number the men, and races and other events.

take some time every day and read the local paper and do internet searches for things to do in your city. go to lectures and readings at book stores, etc. investigate the main city library snf their website. you may find that they sponsor lectures or seminars that may get you out and about and meeting people.

That martial arts class sounds perfect. you will meet a lot of people and also challenge yourself. It was the best thing I ever did for myself after moving here. Look for walkothons. This is the time for them in the fall and its a great way to be around people and do something good while you're at it. Investigate volunteering. More women than men volunteer!

Also just be friendly and talk to people, any people. Be open and willing to reach out. You will be fine. You will do great.

regards