Mature DJs in College

[djzulu]

Anyone out there 30 and older attending grad school / college?

Is it tough meeting college girls when you are older and in school?

I might have to go back to grad school next year - in my early 30's...was wondering if I will be an 'outcast' or manage to blend in with the younger crowd.

 

[WestCoaster]

I went back in my late 30's and it was the best move I made in my life, and not just because it helped me with a significant career change.

First off, after figuring out the grad school chicks were pretty out there, I started meeting undergrads. I, too, was worried about the age difference. I was shocked that it didn't weigh in that much, though I look a lot younger than I am.

It was an eye-opener for me as I was an AFC and convinced I couldn't date younger women. Wrong-o. One thing about undergrad college girls as opposed to young women working at the same age, they're much more open-minded about things.

One key was I discovered sosuave.com while in grad school. I started carrying myself differently. Some gals were nearly half my age, but it didn't matter as long as I took care of myself, acted confident, and didn't act older or tried to act their age. I was just myself.

Your early 30's in grad school? Wow, give us field reports, please! You'll be scoring with young undergrads in no time if you play your cards right -- and I'm 100 percent serious.

Some of my rules as noted:

1. Always approach, whether they're 18, 19, 20, 21, 22 and on up. Do not be obsessed with age. First gal I dated in grad school was way too young for me (an international student from Japan), so young I didn't ask her how old. She later told me her 20th birthday was coming up. Don't ask, don't tell.

2. Some gals will let age get in the way, don't get bummed about it, they have legitimate reasons. One gal I asked out was shocked and didn't see me in that light. I really liked her, oh well, she sees me as a big brother today ... I moved on from her. Get "next" into your vocabulary. For every gal that turns you down, another one will accept you.

3. Don't party like a 20-year old frat rat, but also don't ratchet it down so much that you're boring. One time I came home and there were a bunch of voice messages on my machine at 2 a.m., grad school gals I knew (but they were 24 years old), they were drunk and said, "Hey Timmy, we're over here drunk and naked, get your ass over here." They weren't naked I later found out, but were very drunk ... I thought to myself, this kind of stuff was not happening when I was a career man. Enjoy it while it lasts.

4. As longs as you're fun and light-hearted, women of all ages will quickly look past the age thing. Always be fun and light-hearted.

Have fun ... I'm envious!

 

[djzulu]

WestCoaster - thanks for the info.

Not in grad school yet - just contemplating the issue.

So far doing very well with girls - of all ages, but sometimes it's harder with the younger girls. Which leads me to conclude, after reading your post, that it has to do with context, not your age.

Currently when I meet a young girl I am out of her context - I appear much older (not physically) since I have a job etc. But when you're there you probably blend in better.

This is very useful info - thanks!

 

[WestCoaster]

Girls in college are much better than ones who never attended, IMO. I work at a university and the gals who come in are focused, career-minded, and until they're close to 30, still like men.

The key to being an older grad student is to not ever, ever let age be a factor. Like I said, you'd be amazed how this is not much of a factor for college women.

I decided I had a choice: I could act older, superior, think I'm too old for women ... or enjoy grad school and the women there and just not worry about age. I'm glad I chose the latter.

One thing I wasn't quite ready for, but learned: Most of your relationships in grad school are very temporary, so don't get oneitis (I did for a little while ... stupid AFCism). You will be graduating in a couple years and moving on and so will the women. If you get in a relationship, realize it could end quickly so just relax and enjoy it for as long as it lasts.

Don't go "soul mate" trolling in grad school, just have fun. The pressure from school and research is enough, if you put pressure on yourself outside of school you'll go nuts.

 

[realsmoothie]

i am just starting grad school (I am 31) and it is pretty sweet being at university at this age.

The one thing I have noticed... a LOT of girls at the grad school level are in LTR's, especially the cute ones. Seems to me that they've been in school for a while, and need the comfort of a guy with money... so they'll end up dating someone who already has a decent-paying job in something decidedly un-academic.

As for undergrads... oh, yes...!

 

[WestCoaster]

Great observation realsmoothie, most of the gals in my grad program were either married or in a LTR, and they were pretty arrogant, too.

After one quarter, I discovered undergrads and was pleasantly surprised ... funny, once the grad gals found out I was dating and hanging out with undergrad gals, they started judging me. Very funny.

The key for the grad school man (no matter what age) is to discover undergrad gals!

 

[Zero Hero]

I'm struggling with this so far. I'm only 24 so I'm only a few years older, but I don't know anyone at all here and I'm not meeting people. I'm trying to join clubs and stuff, but I haven't had much luck yet. I'm living alone off-campus so it's hard. Any tips?

 

[WestCoaster]

Zero ... Keep joining organizations and find the campus recreation center/weight room. Tons of women there, easy to approach, too, "How's the weight lifting going, blah, blah, blah."

Don't ever worry about how you come across, just approach like mad. Women in college have yet to get the "bitter gene" that comes from being divorced once or twice. I found the undergrads very refreshing.

Also, if you can find a grad residence hall (I did) that really helps with meeting people. If you don't like that living situation, find an off-campus place not that far off-campus.

Also, hang out at the student union/bookstore, nice places to approach, easy to start conversations.

I'm getting pressure from a former prof to go back for a Ph.d. at where I got my master's, I probably won't do it, but just thinking about the plethora of beautiful, non-bitter women gets me excited.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Anyone out there 30 and older attending grad school / college?

Is it tough meeting college girls when you are older and in school?

I might have to go back to grad school next year - in my early 30's...was wondering if I will be an 'outcast' or manage to blend in with the younger crowd.

You shouldn't have too many problems in Grad School or anything post Grad. Now if you think you'll be sarging new co-eds, that's another thing altogether.

 

[realsmoothie]

You shouldn't have too many problems in Grad School or anything post Grad. Now if you think you'll be sarging new co-eds, that's another thing altogether.

Why? There really isn't that much difference between them. In fact, new co-eds are 90% just looking for a good time, anyhow. Very few of them have steady boyfriends.

Only problem: you won't be staying at their place much. Residences have issues with guys staying over...

 

[WestCoaster]

Francisco is right, probably not new co-eds. I work at a university, the freshmen take about a year to fully become college students. There should be plenty of juniors and seniors to meet if you're confident and if your school has a large enough population.

Don't worry about young freshmen, they're still attached to high school or haning out in the dorms. Meet some upper class students. The quote "very few of them have steady" boyfriends is false. Many of them either still date their high school boyfriends or have quickly met guys in college. Still, one should approach a lot in college, be it as an undergrad or grad student. You will not be put in this situation again with so much opportunity ... sorry, unless you're the pool boy at the Playboy mansion, these kinds of opportunities just aren't out there as you're working in a cubicle next to a bunch of man-haters. And don't think clubs are all that either.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Why? There really isn't that much difference between them. In fact, new co-eds are 90% just looking for a good time, anyhow. Very few of them have steady boyfriends....

I don't know, When I made 30, 18 year old teenie boppers weren't on the top of my list of women to sarge. Even now I look at some of these girls in lecture and feel lucky that I'm not a teenager. There's not much substance in the selection.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Francisco is right, probably not new co-eds. I work at a university, the freshmen take about a year to fully become college students. There should be plenty of juniors and seniors to meet if you're confident and if your school has a large enough population.

Don't worry about young freshmen, they're still attached to high school or haning out in the dorms. Meet some upper class students. The quote "very few of them have steady" boyfriends is false. Many of them either still date their high school boyfriends or have quickly met guys in college. Still, one should approach a lot in college, be it as an undergrad or grad student. You will not be put in this situation again with so much opportunity ... sorry, unless you're the pool boy at the Playboy mansion, these kinds of opportunities just aren't out there as you're working in a cubicle next to a bunch of man-haters. And don't think clubs are all that either.

Exactly. Besides, wouldn't the natural attraction be to other grad students anyway? Whatever happened to the rule of not dating underclassmen?

 

[wayword]

I've had 2 recent encounters with co-eds. Got great signals and high interest, but sorta mixed signals...well, turns out their love lives were rather complicated and were sorta spinning some plates. Still sorta with ex or current bf, I believe. So, age or lack of attraction was not a factor at all, but you may run into a lot of plate-spinning.

 

[WestCoaster]

There's no rule of not dating underclasswomen, Francisco. Also, I posted rather lengthy on why one should, even if they're in grad school. What "rule" are you talking about.

Most women in grad school are either married, have a bf, lesbian and/or hate men. My grad cohort was full of these, so I gravitated toward underclass women. Also, in college many underclass women are not the 18-19 age bracket. More and more are 20 on up.

There's definitely no "rule" regarding this, not sure where you dug up that rule. Undergrad women are infinitely better than grad school women, it's a no-brainer. Go back to college Francisco and you'll see the difference. The women in my grad program would not shut up in class. They'd give an answer and it would go on for 15 minutes like they knew it all.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Most women in grad school are either married, have a bf, lesbian and/or hate men. My grad cohort was full of these, so I gravitated toward underclass women. Also, in college many underclass women are not the 18-19 age bracket. More and more are 20 on up...

Twenty and up and they're just underclassmen???!!! Sorry, no personal time for mouth breathers. I see these teenie boppers on campus daily and I've actually had to sub a couple of times for their instructors. They may be eye candy but as soon as they open their mouths... Nuh-uh... No substance, no depth, no clue.

 

[WestCoaster]

No substance? Try some of the 30 and 40 somethings I've gone out with the last few years.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

No substance? Try some of the 30 and 40 somethings I've gone out with the last few years.

Perhaps but more than likely these women each had their own place, their own transportation and their own funds. Even if they have children, it's a lot easier than if you're sarging a girl that lives in a dorm or is still at home with her parents. Extra points too if they don't spend their days watching MTV and Fear Factor. Hey, I know it's a stereotype but it's more the norm than not.

 

[realsmoothie]

I stand by my assertion that undergrads are OK to date, and that they have less girlfriends than grad students.

I say this as a guy who has been in school for some 12 years on and off.

This doesn't mean grad students are not good for dating, on the contrary... it just means you can't rule any particular group out... particularly twenty year old girls in the physical prime of their lives, ready to party.

Of course, it depends what you're looking for...

 

[belividere]

I've got a love hate thing with grad school.

I've done 4 yrs. so far and am 27. I grew up in and went to school in a big city so I never had a problem finding women or things to do. I started grad school at 23 in a college town. The girls, especially the undergrads, are somewhat easier to approach on one hand, but personally the number of quality girls is lacking.

I can, and do, pick up undergrads all the time. These girls are fun on one hand but really I gotta agree with Francisco here, all they are good for is one thing. They aren't emotionally mature, they want to have too much fun, and they dont have direction. I dont know who said that girls mature faster than boys (Oh wait I do know, it was girls who said that) but they get out from under their parents roof and have no idea how to live on their own. I've also had way too many younger girls get way too emotionally attached very quickly. Ironically, these were the same girls who wanted a more mature man but couldn't understand that mature men dont "fall in love" after a few good nights and have options.

Anyways, that was kind of a rant. There are good and bad things about grad school, I will definetly say that women shouldn't be the reason to do or not do it. This thread is a few months old so I'm not sure if you are in grad school yet or not (or even if you still visit here) but in general it is a lot of work for very little pay, depending on your field you may not be more employable maybe even less employable, and the competition can be a bit much.