Right, so lately I've been working on being more outgoing, outspoken and trying to up the c&f and being interested in women again. I think it's working, feels like kind of flexing a muscle I haven't used in a while, I think I used to be able to do this! Anyway, while I've not been very successful at closing or getting progress with women, I'm really not that focused on that at the moment, I'm generally just trying to kick myself up in gear again.
I've managed to actually approach HBs and strike a conversation without getting bored halfway through. Well, for the most part. Hilariously I had a pretty good chance with a Brazilian chic I met at the gym and I ended up not doing anything other than small talk due to my interest dropping completely.
But I digress.
The point of this is, about a month ago I was at a farewell party of some term students that were leaving the country back to their hometown, and there is this (french) canadian couple that I've met through a friend of mine. The chic is cute, and when I first met her I was kinda interested until I found out she was married - and introduced me to her husband as he sat on the table at the pub. Anyway, we talked a couple more times, I kept it cool, but during this party we got to talking, it was a party so I was feeling pretty good and being quite funny and cheeky, and when we got to the subject of skiing and whatnot ('tis the season down here!).
She started saying how cool it was and how I should go with them next time they go skiing and she would teach me since I said I didn't do it. the thing went back and forth and how I should definitely go blah blah blah. I poked her about how good a teacher she was, she ate it all up and started to qualify herself and how she'd treat me good... Well, long story short, it was obvious she was hitting on me.
Five meters away from her husband.
Oh, my butt would be fine even if I fall on it a few times, according to her expert touch.
Anyway, I stood firm on not wanting to learn skiing, and now she barely speaks to me.
Fine by me (and not unexpected), I wasn't interested, and this time I didn't miss that a woman was hitting on me.
But a couple of weeks ago, wife of a friend who lives in another city (yeah, they are married and live in separate cities, at least for now according to them, I have no idea what their full story is like). She came in due to a conference which I was attending too. The few of us that knew each other hung out for most of the two days together, and the last day we went out for dinner and a few laughs.
Well, by the end of the night she was all over me. I hit her with some jokes and some negs, but no more than the other women in the group, which was pretty mild as I wasn't chasing after any of them. At the end of the night we changed venue, and since me and her husband were the only guys, I went and sat next to him to have a decent conversation going. Ya think she'd sit next to him too, but no, she came and sat right next to me, quite close in fact. So I'm sitting between the two of them, and she's definitely in an "exploratory" mood.
Best of all, she asked me if I was going to attend this other conference a week after that she was attending too. It would be perfectly normal if she had asked during the conference, not at the pub out of the blue when we were joking about something completely unrelated.
Lesson learned?
Apparently I have to work on my behaviour so that it comes across as "I'm not interested" when interacting with women I actually I'm interested in (which is what happened here, except I was genuinely not interested), so that their interest increases with my jokes and convo if they think I'm not interested, but I am. Kinda Zen-like.
Is there anything that may suggest I am tastier to married women than others? It's kind of odd. And looking back, it's not the first time this kind of thing happens.
I've managed to actually approach HBs and strike a conversation without getting bored halfway through. Well, for the most part. Hilariously I had a pretty good chance with a Brazilian chic I met at the gym and I ended up not doing anything other than small talk due to my interest dropping completely.
But I digress.
The point of this is, about a month ago I was at a farewell party of some term students that were leaving the country back to their hometown, and there is this (french) canadian couple that I've met through a friend of mine. The chic is cute, and when I first met her I was kinda interested until I found out she was married - and introduced me to her husband as he sat on the table at the pub. Anyway, we talked a couple more times, I kept it cool, but during this party we got to talking, it was a party so I was feeling pretty good and being quite funny and cheeky, and when we got to the subject of skiing and whatnot ('tis the season down here!).
She started saying how cool it was and how I should go with them next time they go skiing and she would teach me since I said I didn't do it. the thing went back and forth and how I should definitely go blah blah blah. I poked her about how good a teacher she was, she ate it all up and started to qualify herself and how she'd treat me good... Well, long story short, it was obvious she was hitting on me.
Five meters away from her husband.
Oh, my butt would be fine even if I fall on it a few times, according to her expert touch.
Anyway, I stood firm on not wanting to learn skiing, and now she barely speaks to me.
Fine by me (and not unexpected), I wasn't interested, and this time I didn't miss that a woman was hitting on me.
But a couple of weeks ago, wife of a friend who lives in another city (yeah, they are married and live in separate cities, at least for now according to them, I have no idea what their full story is like). She came in due to a conference which I was attending too. The few of us that knew each other hung out for most of the two days together, and the last day we went out for dinner and a few laughs.
Well, by the end of the night she was all over me. I hit her with some jokes and some negs, but no more than the other women in the group, which was pretty mild as I wasn't chasing after any of them. At the end of the night we changed venue, and since me and her husband were the only guys, I went and sat next to him to have a decent conversation going. Ya think she'd sit next to him too, but no, she came and sat right next to me, quite close in fact. So I'm sitting between the two of them, and she's definitely in an "exploratory" mood.
Best of all, she asked me if I was going to attend this other conference a week after that she was attending too. It would be perfectly normal if she had asked during the conference, not at the pub out of the blue when we were joking about something completely unrelated.
Lesson learned?
Apparently I have to work on my behaviour so that it comes across as "I'm not interested" when interacting with women I actually I'm interested in (which is what happened here, except I was genuinely not interested), so that their interest increases with my jokes and convo if they think I'm not interested, but I am. Kinda Zen-like.
Is there anything that may suggest I am tastier to married women than others? It's kind of odd. And looking back, it's not the first time this kind of thing happens.
