Many think I'm gay

[SayWhat]

Hi

I get told often that they think I'm gay. Lately this is getting on my nerves and I ask them why they think this. They can't give a clear answer, they just get this feeling.

Some answers I've got:

I always look like I take care of myself.
- I do always go out well groomed and with decent clothes as I think this is normal
Some say I have this swag in my walk.
- I do try to have this 'chill' walk
Some say it's because of the bracelets I wear.
- I like them, they have some sort of meaning to me. I'm thinking about a surfer necklace as well.

But still it's no clear answer. My question is mainly, is this good for girls? I've read once it's the best compliment you can get. But if many people think this...

Ps: I'm not!

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

It's your body language and the way you talk bro.

 

[Chamber36]

I've had the same thing happen to me too tbh.

I can remember making a post about it years ago.

Was sitting on a big stool at a party. Then 2 girls came sat next to me and started trying to catch my attention. After I didn't really react to them for about a minute, they got fed up, like: "he's gay", and walked away.

I was pretty shocked when that happened.

But the 2 responses you got are on the money.

Make sure you get more buff and talk with a deeper tone of voice.

It's all about masculinity really.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Went through a phase with this when I was in my early 20s. Maybe its cause I was raised by a single mother? Or maybe cause I appear too nice and clean. Funny thing is I am as masculine as they come I just don't show it to much. Hate to say it if I lose my temper in a argument I might hurt someone badly, and I always knew how to keep my frame so I don't end up seriously hurting nobody. Was kind of shy, but growing out of that and not looking back.

Never had many steady girlfriends either. I like to pump and dump and being alone most of the time. The irony is my friends gay friends on different occasions said I don't give out the gay vibe, but some seemingly straight people thought so. Most of the women who thought I was gay was because I indirectly rejected them because they weren't my type and they thought they were prettier then they realy were. I'm pretty picky sometimes unless I am in a slump, ill smash a fat chick then hahahahaha.

Just be you bro let your **** hang talk **** and stop flinging that wrist when you are talking.

And another fun fact....different people think different people are gay. I had people question some of my buddies sexualities A LOT. It varies.....everyone thinks they have gaydar nowadays....smh

 

[Slash Dolo]

A buddy of mine got this a lot... he ended up with an 8.5 he's been dating for a year now.

I wouldn't get too burnt up about it. If it really bothers you, get a more rugged look. A nicely groomed beard goes a long way.

 

[marmel75]

Women love "gay guys"...use it to your advantage, they'll never see it coming...just like the viper...let them come closer and closer, then when they get right next to you STRIKE....they'll never see it coming and never stand a chance

 

[Eljuego]

Hi

I get told often that they think I'm gay. Lately this is getting on my nerves and I ask them why they think this. They can't give a clear answer, they just get this feeling.

Some answers I've got:

I always look like I take care of myself.
- I do always go out well groomed and with decent clothes as I think this is normal
Some say I have this swag in my walk.
- I do try to have this 'chill' walk
Some say it's because of the bracelets I wear.
- I like them, they have some sort of meaning to me. I'm thinking about a surfer necklace as well.

But still it's no clear answer. My question is mainly, is this good for girls? I've read once it's the best compliment you can get. But if many people think this...

Ps: I'm not!

Hello SayWhat,

If I told you that you had green hair, would it bother you? No, because you know that it's not true. What if I was to tell you every other day that you had green hair? Would it get on your nerves? Maybe slightly, but you wouldn't start introverting and think to yourself, "why does he think I have green hair?" You would simply think that I was an idiot and not take me seriously. Laughing at me as you shake your head...

They've managed to push a button because you have a doubt about yourself. I'm not saying you have a doubt about your sexuality. I'm saying you have introverted and wondered why they are saying that. Is it my clothes? Is it my bracelet? Is it my walk? This introversion is second guessing yourself and planting seeds of doubt....

By asking them to clarify why they think that, you are handing them tremendous power; They now know that they have found a "hot button" and will use it for their own amusement and at their leisure.

Don't fall into the invalidation trap: They make an underhand comment (the gay comment), you take the bait and ask them to explain, they don't have a clear answer (or some will say "forget it/it doesn't matter) and your left in a state of uncertainty. The key is not to take the bait.

You could say, "maybe I am...." or "you never know...." and change the subject (neg the biatch).....leave them with ambiguity....


Fvck what "they" think. Accept yourself 100%

 

[Bokanovsky]

You can be called "gay" for two reasons:

1) You really do look, talk and/or act in manner that appears to be gay; or
2) You are being insulted by someone who is trying to bring you down a notch, is jealous of your looks, style, etc. or an insecure woman who thinks that you are too good for her.

It's impossible to determine which one these two applies to you based on the information provided.

 

[FairShake]

It's your body language and the way you talk bro.

This.

In the last year I've really stepped up my clothing style, I like Broadway, classical music, art, fine wine, and trash TV, plus I'm a semi-obnoxious guy but in a nice and witty manner. This should scream gay to anyone paying attention.

However I'm also a big ugly chubby bearded dude that sounds like I'm from the movie Rocky. I never get gay because of this.

It's how you walk and talk. Forget that "swag" walk and talk. That's for kids and, well, gay guys.

 

[Bible_Belt]

The straightest answer to the 'are you gay?' question, and the one for anyone who #1 isn't homophobic and #2 actually has a sense of humor, is to take the joke and run with it. Say the most absurd, ridiculous thing you can with a straight face and see how long you can go without cracking up.

The fighters I used to train with would rip on each other all the time. Call someone a homo, and it will quickly turn into a gross-out contest. I've never heard the phrase "cvm fart" used so often.