Lust is gone, but I still care about her. Someone slap my AFC ass.

[Mycoman]

Hi everyone, im back after a 364 day relationship. Yep, I dumped her the day before our 1 year, classy, huh? Ive got sooo many issues to deal with and sort out from this LTR, and i dont want to put them all in 1 post.

When we hooked up I was finally getting the DJ ways, dating 3 girls and fooled around with several others. The hotties were all *****es to say the least. They would blow me off, or play games, or just be, you know, like hotties are.

So this one girl was realy cool to me, but she was over weight and i wasnnt that hot for her, but I liked her. She was chasing me big time so I went for it. We dated for like 2 months before we became exclusive, and she was realy pressuring me subliminaly to be "a couple". I liked her but was still hesitant to settle. She won and I caved. Even though I liked her, I felt a part of me died that day. The past 6 months I had learned the DJ ways and was finaly happy being single.

Anyhow, she practically moved in, stayed over every night. She was showing lots and lots of AFC personalities. After about 6 months I started to become not so interested in her sexually and she noticed. She got more AFC and desperate at times.

At this point I realized this relationship was mirroring my last one, except she is the AFC this time, not me. Very odd realizaation, made me think alot, and I already knew what was coming down the road.

Over the next 6 months the attraction problem worsened and I started looking at other chicks more and more. I felt like I was unfaithful and I felt I was lying every time I told her I loved her. I have been thinking of ending it for 4 months now.

The 1 year anniversary was in less than a week and i decided it wouldnt be right to go through with it, not being real to me or her, so i ended it telling her i needed time by myself to figure out what I want.

This has been building for months and now I feel real bad, broke up with her yesterday, today is our 1 year. I keep flipping back and forth from being ok, to wanting her back.

I know I was right to end it, why does it hurt? Please slap this stinking AFC out of me. Shake me, kick me, flame me, tell me i made the right choice.

Thanks.

 

[DankNuggs]

You did make the right choice, most of being a DJ is to start living your life on your own terms. Make choices that make YOU happy. Do it for yourself...Get rid of all dead weight in your life....

 

[OddTech]

And welcome to the board!!

 

[bothbarrels]

She noticed...

She noticed that you were not into her sexually and she stayed around?
Dude, your doing her a favor. Probably should have let her go a few months back but oh well.
Dumped befor the aniversury. How did she handle it?

 

[Mycoman]

She isnt doing good. She just stopped by and got the rest of her stuff. Too upset to say anything more than the bare minimum to get her stuff and leave.

And yes, I should have ended it a few months back.

On a lighter note, I was out at the park today playing volleyball and back to my old self, smiles and neghits for everyone with tits, WOO HOO I'M SINGLE AGAIN. I walked right up to the hottest girl there and went to work. Yep, ive still got it! Feels good, real damn good.

 

[trajhenkhet]

Its not wrong to care about people. Just to care about people above your own being is when its wrong.

 

[Oscar Wilde]

Been, done, t-shirt

Almost exactly like my own situation, but we lasted 369 days

I didn't feel so bad about going over the 1yr barrier as the breakup was semi-mutual, until she realised at the last minute that she was making a mistake. Too late, I was on the plane and outta there.

Man, it's tough, but you gotta take care of yourself too. I let this one drift on for 3 months after I knew I had to end it - all cos I didn't want to hurt her. Bad reason.

I gave the same advice to georgie recently: become a workaholic and a gymaholic for a couple of weeks. It'll give you more energy, keep you busy and take your mind off it all. Try and pick up a chick for some no strings fun too, getting your 1st one over you quickly helps with the confidence and gets you over the emotional link.

Good luck,
Osc.

 

[8ball]

Don't EVER stay w/ a woman 'cause you feel sorry for her.

EVER.

I made that mistake w/ my now ex-wife.

That should tell you the whole story right there.

You don't like her? Dump her a$$.

Now. Don't look back. Don't let her sucker you back in. Don't let her trick you into getting her pregnant. ( Then you are SCREWED. TRUST ME! )


Throw her $hit out and wash your hands clean of everything having to do w/ her.

Move away if that's what it takes.

 

[Mycoman]

She called last night crying trying to get me to take her back. I stuck to my guns though. I was out yesterday at the park playing volleyball and it felt good to be able to flirt and not feel like im cheating. It felt good enough that I was sure I made the right choice to end it. I thought it would be harder to deal with this phone call than it was though. For some reason I wanted to give her some DJ advice on not getting wooped. She was so baddly AFC and the things she said were sooo clingy and AFC, it made it easy to tell her again "im sorry, but my feelings are gone, its time for me to move on"

Thanks to everyone who posts here at sosuave.com, I now have the pride and the courage to do what is best for myself.