I've been talking to a girl that appears to have a low self-esteem. She's not very optomistic, but eats my optomism up for some reason. I don't offer advice, only do some affirmations centering me. After our last conversation she told me that I was one of the most amazing people she knows. How do you handle girls with low self-esteem aside from nexting them quickly.
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Low Self Esteem Girl - ???
- Thread starter John11276
- Start date
Be careful.
My girl has low self esteem. I have encouraged her, supported her (emotionally), etc. She now is so hooked on me that it's almost stalkerish...
I've thought about nexting her, but I like her as a person. She's just gotten so "clingy". Always calling, stopping by, etc. The other night I told her we need to chill out a little. She was in tears. She called me the next day like we didn't even have the conv.
Just make sure she knows you don't want to be serious. Even if you do...
My girl has low self esteem. I have encouraged her, supported her (emotionally), etc. She now is so hooked on me that it's almost stalkerish...
I've thought about nexting her, but I like her as a person. She's just gotten so "clingy". Always calling, stopping by, etc. The other night I told her we need to chill out a little. She was in tears. She called me the next day like we didn't even have the conv.
Just make sure she knows you don't want to be serious. Even if you do...
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
If she has potencial of becoming her own woman, stick around to encourage her. If not, she could be a pretty good "friend" as long as you don't lead her to believe that there could be more in your relationship.
So here's the gist of the story. I met her, went out, talked and hit it off. Then things started to happen in her life and I backed off for a few weeks. She's getting ready for grad school, a move, found out her father is dying, on top of all this like I said she is very pecemistic about things. She says that talking to me is the only thing keeping her motivated these days. ??? I shoot back with affirmations that things will work out the way that they are suppossed to for her. Little things like that. She seems to be eating it up pretty good. Very bright girl and a total 9 in the looks department. Is it true that girls with low self esteem-depressed girls fall for the image of a strong guy rather than the guy themselves. It's very delicate.
One of my ex's had a low self esteem...or more like self worth.
I had encountered a lot of problems with this chick because of this. It was like she always needed attention (attention *****) or praise from others to keep her going.
Worst thing was, when i did next her she told people she was wanting to and dreaming about killing herself. Definately NOT GOOD!
I do agree to some level that these girls do find comfort in stronger guys but not necessarily overlook the guy himself. If she is a 9 id give her a chance, sounds like she does have a lot going on atm.
Try not to be her emotional tampon, try and always be happy and cheerful around her and if she starts talking about ****, change the subject.
See how you go.
I had encountered a lot of problems with this chick because of this. It was like she always needed attention (attention *****) or praise from others to keep her going.
Worst thing was, when i did next her she told people she was wanting to and dreaming about killing herself. Definately NOT GOOD!
I do agree to some level that these girls do find comfort in stronger guys but not necessarily overlook the guy himself. If she is a 9 id give her a chance, sounds like she does have a lot going on atm.
Try not to be her emotional tampon, try and always be happy and cheerful around her and if she starts talking about ****, change the subject.
See how you go.
MR_PERFECT
Senior Don Juan
It's never good to be in a relationship with someone that has low self-esteem. When I was younger, I had low self-esteem, which disrupted the relationship. I also felt like I "needed" her in my life and stayed in the relationship to long. You never know for sure with someone that has low self-esteem, is she in the relationship out of love, or is she to weak and dependent to be on her own.
I would suggest you breakup with her, but if your heart is in it, it won't be that easy.
I would suggest you breakup with her, but if your heart is in it, it won't be that easy.
Well, in all other aspects my girl was great, hot as hell, intelligent, kind, affectionate etc etc.. but she didn't see this and worried way too much.
But, she disrespected me one night when we were out clubbing and that was that. I ended it. I basically told her to "Grow up and get over herself."
Then i heard from friends she was talking about 'killing herself' and that there was nothing good in her life. I know there's a lot of people out there who are ALL TALK and are just looking for sympathy and i figured this was the case and she brought it on herself anyway - she has no right to blame me for wanting to die. If someone is seriously willing to kill themself because of losing a guy/gal then theres other issues at work or her mental state is very low to begin with.
Problem is, i found out later she had actually stabbed herself in the past so that made me change me way of thinking. I should have supported her a little better (but in no way be USED by her) through her hard times.
If the same situation presented itself, and assuming i had already broken up with her -i would point out all the good things she has going for her and point her in the right direction.
That is my situation and i still see her around so she musn't have gone ahead with it
Just remember, it is her problem not yours. You are in control of your own life. I am NOT a psychiatrist nor am i going to act like one, EVER.
Just be as nice and gentle as you can. But make sure she understands exactly what you are saying.
tiburon
Banned
i see it this way
better to have a girl with low self steem than a slut..most of the girls i have known like this are pretty good girls who have wonderful feelings and get depress easily with bad things..this day there is alot of bad things lol. Just becareful in how you treat her because you dont want to feel sorry for her....and also make sure she is actually a person with low self -steem and not something else -- you will be surprised..!! Make sure you suport her but just enough dont be an AFC...it can easily happen as you think she is all over you with low self steem and you help her so much you decrease her IL. ITS very delicate but with maturity and being a DJ you can make her into a wonderful wife if she is wife material.
Tiburon
better to have a girl with low self steem than a slut..most of the girls i have known like this are pretty good girls who have wonderful feelings and get depress easily with bad things..this day there is alot of bad things lol. Just becareful in how you treat her because you dont want to feel sorry for her....and also make sure she is actually a person with low self -steem and not something else -- you will be surprised..!! Make sure you suport her but just enough dont be an AFC...it can easily happen as you think she is all over you with low self steem and you help her so much you decrease her IL. ITS very delicate but with maturity and being a DJ you can make her into a wonderful wife if she is wife material.
Tiburon
neosynthetic
Don Juan
nevermind this post.
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tiburon
Banned
i guess..
if you want to be that low and use a nice person for your own benefit..that doesnt make you a man tough..why dont you get a piar of balls and get a slut for that ****...
Tiburon
if you want to be that low and use a nice person for your own benefit..that doesnt make you a man tough..why dont you get a piar of balls and get a slut for that ****...
Tiburon
seloifter
Senior Don Juan
omg, sounds so much like an old gf (well, if you could call her that..... we went out like twice)
she had real low self esteem, and was really drawn to my confidence and optimism........ stalkerishly so..... I mean she looked up my phone number and called me like 5 times an hour and kept telling me how great I was and she didn't deserve me (hmmm.....) then after our 2nd date I told her she was a little too [a more polite way of saying "really f-ed up in the head'] for me and we got into this big fight where she told me never to tlak to her again.....
three days later she calls me as though nothing had ever happened and we were a happy couple..... yea..... that's the last time I ever talked to her......
neosynthetic
Don Juan
I didn't mean it like that tiburon, I see how someone could see it from another perspective though, I'll take that out