How many of us on this forum have lost the magic?
Lost the magic?
Whatever could that mean?
The magic of truly living your life. Not just existing as some cold, calculating, robotic, player. But, truly living . Living like you did when you were young and carefree. I'm not advocating returning to a naive, AFC- state of life. But, where's the joy and the magic.
I read so many posts on here full of resentment, hurt, fear, over-analysis. It's painful to see. So many, wasting so much time arguing over everything and missing hours of their lives.
Don't get me wrong, it's important to learn a lot of things on this site to avoid a lot of unnecessary pain and wasted time in relationships. I spent a lot of time on here in past years, too. It's also good to discuss some things to stay fresh on your "game", when you're dating around. And, after getting dumped or disappointed, this forum is good for group therapy and healing (not to mention more needed learning).
But, when do you draw the line? When is all your time agonizing over one girl, one situation, one argument with another poster (whom you've never even met) When is it enough? When does it start to interfere with your joy of living? When do you cease being a real human being, the real "you"? When do you use memorized pick-up lines, patterns, and techniques so much that you forget what it's like to have a normal interaction with another human being?
I've actually been on and off this forum for a few years. I was in my mid-twenties when I had my first real date. The girl was beautiful. I was the epitome of the AFC. I was dumped after one date. Dumped by a girl who initially liked me. I was clueless and wanted to know why?
I ended up finding this forum. I read it for a couple of months before posting. It was the Golden Age of this forum. Anti-Dump was posting. Pook was just starting. And I began posting under the name of Dr_Feelgood.
I have to admit, I'm a bit embarassed by some of what I posted then (as well as my ignorance). At that time, this forum was my magic . I learned and experimented. I dated and began having small successes. Little by little, I thought I was becoming a DJ. I couldn't wait to spend hours on this forum every day. I still managed to date, and work full time. I mastered C&F, kino, eye-contact, body language, everything. I became obsessed.
With my obsession came success. I was getting dates, some with even beautiful, desirable women. I was getting laid. I was becoming confident. Or, was I?
For awhile I even left the forums. I was arrogant. Thought I knew all I would ever need to know. I had planned to never come back to this forum. I thought I would never need to.
Then after an LTR ended badly, I returned under a new name. Hurt and full of hate, I stirred up trouble with some of my posts. I had learned a lot, but none of it was good. I unleashed my vengeance on as many poor, innocent girls as I could find. They weren't all so innocent , but many were. I slept around. Refused to get into relationships. I became so good at seducing girls, that I got many ONS. A few girls even begged me for sex after a ONS with them.
In my AFC past, this would have delighted me. But, it didn’t. I was starting to become a monster, without a soul. I lost my joy. I lost the magic.
Then, I got a wake-up call. One of the girls I had slept with was 8 months pregnant. Either me, or her boyfriend was the father. I was horrified. All of my messing around, all of my ignorance, and arrogance had caught up with me. I stopped going out. I stopped posting on here again, shortly after another name change. (my current one).
The night that the baby was born, I went to the hospital. I held that baby girl in my arms, while watching the sun set. She was so beautiful, innocent, perfect. A feeling of warmth, satisfaction, and joy overcame me. To any of you who have ever held your first newborn infant, you know what I mean. I vowed then to change for the better. Whether she was my daughter or not, I was going to become a better man. The kind of man we first aspire to be as DJs. A man’s man, a man who can be respected, honored, GREAT!
I stopped dating and going out. I encountered serious health problems that were not corrected until recently. I suffered financial setbacks, that caused me to move back in with my parents at age 30. And, I never found out whether or not the baby was my daughter.
Now, I’ve nearly fully recovered my health. I’m getting back into great physical shape, and I’m doing great financially. I’m also returning to school to do something that has been a passion of mine for most of my life. I’m getting ready to re-locate. I’m finally living my life for me. I’m finally Living. I found the magic again.
Lost the magic?
Whatever could that mean?
The magic of truly living your life. Not just existing as some cold, calculating, robotic, player. But, truly living . Living like you did when you were young and carefree. I'm not advocating returning to a naive, AFC- state of life. But, where's the joy and the magic.
I read so many posts on here full of resentment, hurt, fear, over-analysis. It's painful to see. So many, wasting so much time arguing over everything and missing hours of their lives.
Don't get me wrong, it's important to learn a lot of things on this site to avoid a lot of unnecessary pain and wasted time in relationships. I spent a lot of time on here in past years, too. It's also good to discuss some things to stay fresh on your "game", when you're dating around. And, after getting dumped or disappointed, this forum is good for group therapy and healing (not to mention more needed learning).
But, when do you draw the line? When is all your time agonizing over one girl, one situation, one argument with another poster (whom you've never even met) When is it enough? When does it start to interfere with your joy of living? When do you cease being a real human being, the real "you"? When do you use memorized pick-up lines, patterns, and techniques so much that you forget what it's like to have a normal interaction with another human being?
I've actually been on and off this forum for a few years. I was in my mid-twenties when I had my first real date. The girl was beautiful. I was the epitome of the AFC. I was dumped after one date. Dumped by a girl who initially liked me. I was clueless and wanted to know why?
I ended up finding this forum. I read it for a couple of months before posting. It was the Golden Age of this forum. Anti-Dump was posting. Pook was just starting. And I began posting under the name of Dr_Feelgood.
I have to admit, I'm a bit embarassed by some of what I posted then (as well as my ignorance). At that time, this forum was my magic . I learned and experimented. I dated and began having small successes. Little by little, I thought I was becoming a DJ. I couldn't wait to spend hours on this forum every day. I still managed to date, and work full time. I mastered C&F, kino, eye-contact, body language, everything. I became obsessed.
With my obsession came success. I was getting dates, some with even beautiful, desirable women. I was getting laid. I was becoming confident. Or, was I?
For awhile I even left the forums. I was arrogant. Thought I knew all I would ever need to know. I had planned to never come back to this forum. I thought I would never need to.
Then after an LTR ended badly, I returned under a new name. Hurt and full of hate, I stirred up trouble with some of my posts. I had learned a lot, but none of it was good. I unleashed my vengeance on as many poor, innocent girls as I could find. They weren't all so innocent , but many were. I slept around. Refused to get into relationships. I became so good at seducing girls, that I got many ONS. A few girls even begged me for sex after a ONS with them.
In my AFC past, this would have delighted me. But, it didn’t. I was starting to become a monster, without a soul. I lost my joy. I lost the magic.
Then, I got a wake-up call. One of the girls I had slept with was 8 months pregnant. Either me, or her boyfriend was the father. I was horrified. All of my messing around, all of my ignorance, and arrogance had caught up with me. I stopped going out. I stopped posting on here again, shortly after another name change. (my current one).
The night that the baby was born, I went to the hospital. I held that baby girl in my arms, while watching the sun set. She was so beautiful, innocent, perfect. A feeling of warmth, satisfaction, and joy overcame me. To any of you who have ever held your first newborn infant, you know what I mean. I vowed then to change for the better. Whether she was my daughter or not, I was going to become a better man. The kind of man we first aspire to be as DJs. A man’s man, a man who can be respected, honored, GREAT!
I stopped dating and going out. I encountered serious health problems that were not corrected until recently. I suffered financial setbacks, that caused me to move back in with my parents at age 30. And, I never found out whether or not the baby was my daughter.
Now, I’ve nearly fully recovered my health. I’m getting back into great physical shape, and I’m doing great financially. I’m also returning to school to do something that has been a passion of mine for most of my life. I’m getting ready to re-locate. I’m finally living my life for me. I’m finally Living. I found the magic again.
