Looking for advice

[MoMoney96]

Hi guys. Been a lurker for years, but I've decided to kill the AFC in me. It's been a tough challenge since I'm making a lot of mistakes in learning from Pook. I'm just an amateur now, but I'm working on it. On to my problem:

Ok so I met this cute girl in class who is my type physically. She's also smart and has similar interests as me. I occasionally teased her and we have studied together at the library and I also took her out for some coffee. It was at the coffee session that we talked a bit to learn about each other (rapport and comofort), but unfortunately, I still suck at kino. There was literally none. However, I did make good on the deep connection. So this is what I learned about her:

She has some issues with her family. Quite a rebel and moved from new york to san fran for school. Has issues with her parents. Also has issues with ppl judging her (looks). But she is good looking.

I tried to steer the conversation away from dark topics best I could without being her psychologist or tampon, but something felt off. We then started talking about her past relationships and she mentions she went out with her best friend and it felt weird. So I guess this is where I screwed up. I heard that and thought, "Well I better tell her now before I get ljbf" and told her you know your cute inside and out since she is pretty down to earth. She says she doesn't have time for a relationship right now and can't commit. I was not looking to get married or anything, so I told her let's just go out and see how it goes. No commitments. No big deal. She says she still wants to be friends and i'm like damn. I tell her, if we go out, know that I'll be hitting on you and rather than be a friend, I would prefer to be ambiguous. We end it at that and go home.

Zoom to next week and I can feel things sort of slipping away. I usually wait for her so we can walk out of class and either head home or library. Sometimes she will head home and I will split to library. One day at the library when she was leaving, I hugged her. She gave a really weak hug one handed. Thinking back, I should have took control and said that's weak and make her give me a real hug. After that, it just keeps going downhill.

Anyways, I thought something is off so to prevent anymore stupid mistakes I've initiated no contact for now until I can figure out what to do. I don't text her or call her so that isn't an issue. It's usually in class. Maybe I'm still being AFCish by waiting on her to walk home or to the library even after all that. So what I did today was just leave earlier and didn't even say bye or anything to the library.

Guys, I was wondering what I should do? I'm going to work on more girls for sure, but at the same time, finding a quality girl is hard. There's tons of girls, but very few good ones. It's frustrating to continue working on the skills only to get clipped in the face.

Also, a weird thing happens to me. All the cute girls I ever want, I have a super difficult time getting. However, fml, I'm always attracting the ****ing pigs and bottom of the barrel ugly without any effort. In fact, yesterday night one of them texted me who wanted to "hang out today".

 

[pyros]

Hi guys. Been a lurker for years, but I've decided to kill the AFC in me. It's been a tough challenge since I'm making a lot of mistakes in learning from Pook. I'm just an amateur now, but I'm working on it. On to my problem:

Ok so I met this cute girl in class who is my type physically. She's also smart and has similar interests as me. I occasionally teased her and we have studied together at the library and I also took her out for some coffee. It was at the coffee session that we talked a bit to learn about each other (rapport and comofort), but unfortunately, I still suck at kino. There was literally none. However, I did make good on the deep connection. So this is what I learned about her:

She has some issues with her family. Quite a rebel and moved from new york to san fran for school. Has issues with her parents. Also has issues with ppl judging her (looks). But she is good looking.

I tried to steer the conversation away from dark topics best I could without being her psychologist or tampon, but something felt off. We then started talking about her past relationships and she mentions she went out with her best friend and it felt weird. So I guess this is where I screwed up. I heard that and thought, "Well I better tell her now before I get ljbf" and told her you know your cute inside and out since she is pretty down to earth. She says she doesn't have time for a relationship right now and can't commit. I was not looking to get married or anything, so I told her let's just go out and see how it goes. No commitments. No big deal. She says she still wants to be friends and i'm like damn. I tell her, if we go out, know that I'll be hitting on you and rather than be a friend, I would prefer to be ambiguous. We end it at that and go home.

Zoom to next week and I can feel things sort of slipping away. I usually wait for her so we can walk out of class and either head home or library. Sometimes she will head home and I will split to library. One day at the library when she was leaving, I hugged her. She gave a really weak hug one handed. Thinking back, I should have took control and said that's weak and make her give me a real hug. After that, it just keeps going downhill.

Anyways, I thought something is off so to prevent anymore stupid mistakes I've initiated no contact for now until I can figure out what to do. I don't text her or call her so that isn't an issue. It's usually in class. Maybe I'm still being AFCish by waiting on her to walk home or to the library even after all that. So what I did today was just leave earlier and didn't even say bye or anything to the library.

Guys, I was wondering what I should do? I'm going to work on more girls for sure, but at the same time, finding a quality girl is hard. There's tons of girls, but very few good ones. It's frustrating to continue working on the skills only to get clipped in the face.

Also, a weird thing happens to me. All the cute girls I ever want, I have a super difficult time getting. However, fml, I'm always attracting the ****ing pigs and bottom of the barrel ugly without any effort. In fact, yesterday night one of them texted me who wanted to "hang out today".

This is how it goes for all of us. You always attract the girls you dont like because they have less sexual value than you, and it gets difficult to get the ones you like because they have the same or above sexual market value than you. Besides, these 'cute' girls are REALLY on demand so they have dozens of options to choose from. They have so many options that they have problems when they have to decide.

what can you do? there are a few things that every guy here would tell you to improve your sexual value like getting ripped, dressing better, having a nice haircut, being more social etc...

These can certainly help, but it will be still pretty difficult to get the girls you like, cause we live in an era where women have all the sexual/relationship power because of the abundance of di-cks to choose from.
So you can just try to get them over and over...and you will get something at some point...or you can date down...
You can also stay and home and jack off and play pc games, though. It is up to you.

There is no magical pill...unless your a football/music star and you have hot models surrounding you everyday.

 

[TheVampSlayer]

This is how it goes for all of us. You always attract the girls you dont like because they have less sexual value than you, and it gets difficult to get the ones you like because they have the same or above sexual market value than you. Besides, these 'cute' girls are REALLY on demand so they have dozens of options to choose from. They have so many options that they have problems when they have to decide.

This. I am not super good at the game yet, but this is also a constant for me. Except I found it doesn't happen only with ugly girls. It happens with cute girls too that have a lot of betas surrounding her as long as you're not interested. I guess the true key is faking this around girls you ARE interested in.

 

[Obsidian]

It sounds like you acted like an androgynous male when you were at the coffee shop. Also, re-read the section on W0manese. You don't just tell a girl that she is cute. For crying out loud.

 

[BlueAlpha1]

We've all been there man. You've definitely got a long way to go, and yes you're in the friend zone. The dreaded one armed hug is hard to come back from.

The best thing to do is accept that she may not come around, but you can still actively try to look and feel your best when you're likely to be around her.

You guys are in school? Like college? Party and hookup with a few other girls to establish the abundance mindset, and go to the library when she'll be there with another girl. Might even work to join her and try to pit them against each other by flirting with the second girl. Good luck.

 

[MoMoney96]

Yes I'm in college right now. I am following all of the lifestyle tips right now. Working out 3x a week. Planning on being chiseled. I'm also doing a wardrobe makeover. Dumping anything that screams homo right now. Trying to have a fashionable image with bad boy look.

As for school, she is only here for summer school. In the regular school year, she goes to a different university.

Yes, I realize I massively ****ed up by telling her she is cute at the coffee shop. It only dawned on me afterwards. I mean, you can read all the dj **** you want, but when your out in the field, you start to forget stuff and gosh...it's hitting me like a brick.

Anyways, I appreciate the harsh truth since it's what's needed. No need to sugarcoat anything.

It is summer right now, but yes, I'm planning to get more girls, but as I mentioned in my post, it's hard to find one with good personality, good looks and basically a good girl.

I'm learning DJ because I want to be a better man and to stop being stomped on by this ****. I realize I've been this loser nice guy beta crapola for all my life and it has basically gotten me pigs and worst. The worst **** is that I know for a fact I'm not bad looking. So yes, it's definitely my fault for being this ****ty when I see ugly ass guys with good looking girls.

 

[Infern0]

Hi guys. Been a lurker for years, but I've decided to kill the AFC in me. It's been a tough challenge since I'm making a lot of mistakes in learning from Pook. I'm just an amateur now, but I'm working on it. On to my problem:

Ok so I met this cute girl in class who is my type physically. She's also smart and has similar interests as me. I occasionally teased her and we have studied together at the library and I also took her out for some coffee. It was at the coffee session that we talked a bit to learn about each other (rapport and comofort), but unfortunately, I still suck at kino. There was literally none. However, I did make good on the deep connection. So this is what I learned about her:

She has some issues with her family. Quite a rebel and moved from new york to san fran for school. Has issues with her parents. Also has issues with ppl judging her (looks). But she is good looking.

I tried to steer the conversation away from dark topics best I could without being her psychologist or tampon, but something felt off. We then started talking about her past relationships and she mentions she went out with her best friend and it felt weird. So I guess this is where I screwed up. I heard that and thought, "Well I better tell her now before I get ljbf" and told her you know your cute inside and out since she is pretty down to earth. She says she doesn't have time for a relationship right now and can't commit. I was not looking to get married or anything, so I told her let's just go out and see how it goes. No commitments. No big deal. She says she still wants to be friends and i'm like damn. I tell her, if we go out, know that I'll be hitting on you and rather than be a friend, I would prefer to be ambiguous. We end it at that and go home.

Zoom to next week and I can feel things sort of slipping away. I usually wait for her so we can walk out of class and either head home or library. Sometimes she will head home and I will split to library. One day at the library when she was leaving, I hugged her. She gave a really weak hug one handed. Thinking back, I should have took control and said that's weak and make her give me a real hug. After that, it just keeps going downhill.

Anyways, I thought something is off so to prevent anymore stupid mistakes I've initiated no contact for now until I can figure out what to do. I don't text her or call her so that isn't an issue. It's usually in class. Maybe I'm still being AFCish by waiting on her to walk home or to the library even after all that. So what I did today was just leave earlier and didn't even say bye or anything to the library.

Guys, I was wondering what I should do? I'm going to work on more girls for sure, but at the same time, finding a quality girl is hard. There's tons of girls, but very few good ones. It's frustrating to continue working on the skills only to get clipped in the face.

Also, a weird thing happens to me. All the cute girls I ever want, I have a super difficult time getting. However, fml, I'm always attracting the ****ing pigs and bottom of the barrel ugly without any effort. In fact, yesterday night one of them texted me who wanted to "hang out today".

You messed up from the off by friendzoning yourself (big mistake, i've done it in the past)

Obviously then you pull out the left-field "i like you" which it's always bad to say this, you show it through your actions.

You also have classic scarcity mindset, and your self talk suck, the reason you attract the pigs is the same as pretty much every guy, because you don't pedestalize them so they don't lose attraction for you. Before I knew what I was doing, cute girls 7/10s would still show initial attraction to me, based purely on my looks, they'd be texting me, asking me to hang out etc but my game sucked so bad and my self talk was so bad I blew these oppotunities or didn't even realise the girl was into me, so they'd lose attraction and it ended up going nowhere. Looking back it's frustrating, 7s are easy work if you know the basics.

As for this main girl, well you made your feelings clear, not in the best way but she knows you like her so you should never approach her again, she will come to you if there is any reason whatsoever. Don't wait for her, don't be hugging her etc.

Basically you have no fundamentals which is your problem here, you need to learn, read corey wayne 3% man, and book of pook and immerse yourself in podcasts, videos etc, assimilate all and any information you can.

Just so you know, I had a situation almost identical to you, 8.5-9/10 girl, super cute, but I ended up friendzoned I walked away from it, then I half assed my studies on PUA skills etc, well about a month later she reached out to me and her IL had raised into the high 60% range, I had enough basics to raise it into the 70% range she was sending me nudes and saying she wanted to **** me and how I turned her on etc

So she's on the phone telling me how turned on she was and she's playing with herself but my game was so whack I just fluffed it and let the moment slide when I should have got her to come over and sealed it

I could have sealed the deal with her but because I still had massive knowledge gaps I messed it up and she went back down to below 50% and vanished.

So I had her nudes on my phone and texts saying she wanted to **** etc and I blew it and those pictures were there, tormenting my failure.

You don't want to be in that situation where a month or two later you suddenly see every mistake you made, every subtle hint you missed, and realise that she was there for the taking and you blew it.

Do the work

 

[Obsidian]

Overall, you gotta keep things lighter and more playful. You don't tell a girl that you want to date her. You just date her. You're already basically out with her anyway, no need to be scheduling another date right then. Live in the moment, not in the clouds.

Yes, I realize I massively ****ed up by telling her she is cute at the coffee shop. It only dawned on me afterwards. I mean, you can read all the dj **** you want, but when your out in the field, you start to forget stuff and gosh...it's hitting me like a brick.

Seriously, re-read the chapters on W0manese. You messed up on that. You don't tell her that she's cute; you just touch her.

Also, you didn't seem to take the hint when she said, "I'm not looking for a relationship." That statement is also covered in the chapter on W0manese.

Once she said that, you had two options: 1) Bail on her, or 2) Say something to the effect of, "Who said anything about wanting a relationship?" She's already assuming that you're ready to propose to her when all you want to do is hang out. Don't let her make things so serious, either.

Talking about other guys is also covered in the W0manese chapters, but your description of the conversation wasn't really clear enough to tell you what it means.

 

[MoMoney96]

Actually, I secretly recorded the conversation so that I could learn from it. I don't think I typed everything on here and maybe missing stuff. Perhaps its tunnel vision and I can't see it. Would anyone be interested in analyzing my f up if I upload it? I'd be really glad for a 3rd person perspective.

 

[Obsidian]

That's really intense -- which I think is exactly the wrong attitude. You need to lighten up and have fun with your life. Re-read the whole Book of Pook because you don't seem to understand it. And I already told you what you did wrong, anyway. You weren't sexual, you were slightly boring, and you acted too serious by jumping to the compliments for no reason, telling her that you weren't going to be around her unless she gave you permission to hit on her, allowing her to frame the issue as whether you should get into a "relationship," etc.

Ignore her for a little bit, get a life, and start again.

 

[Obsidian]

Also: You said that you sucked at kino. Easiest forms of kino are 1) Touching a girl on the shoulder (or hand) when you talk to her, 2) hugging her if she expresses sadness of any kind, 3) Invading her personal space if you get any kind of decent excuse (e.g., if she is looking up something on her phone) without necessarily touching her but just getting close, and 4) Cuddling during movies.

There are two main rules of thumb for kino:

1) Don't kino a girl to make her like you. Instead, kino her because you like her, and because you desire to touch her.

2) Don't desire to touch her excessively simply out of desperation.

 

[MoMoney96]

So a little update. But before I go on, let me just say damn you guys are spot on!

So today in class we were doing introduction on a subject and she introduces her boyfriend. I don't if it was true or not, but I'm gonna just assume it's true. She was dressed up today too with lipstick and all.

She never mentioned she had a bf so go figure. But anyways, I just played it off and didn't even care nor did I look at her much. I only did it using my peripherals and saw her doing the same lol.

But I was wondering, is there anything else I can do besides being nonchalant and non reactive. I know I was tempted to talk to her today and say she look good all dolled up, but resisted the dumb afc that wanted to break the no contact. Damn, I don't know how you guys manage to do no contact with a good looking girl as it's a struggle....for real!

Anyways, I'm still moving on to improve myself reading the guides by pook more in depth to more fully understand the fundamentals. Thanks for the advice guys!

 

[Rival]

So a little update. But before I go on, let me just say damn you guys are spot on!

So today in class we were doing introduction on a subject and she introduces her boyfriend. I don't if it was true or not, but I'm gonna just assume it's true. She was dressed up today too with lipstick and all.

She never mentioned she had a bf so go figure. But anyways, I just played it off and didn't even care nor did I look at her much. I only did it using my peripherals and saw her doing the same lol.

But I was wondering, is there anything else I can do besides being nonchalant and non reactive. I know I was tempted to talk to her today and say she look good all dolled up, but resisted the dumb afc that wanted to break the no contact. Damn, I don't know how you guys manage to do no contact with a good looking girl as it's a struggle....for real!

Anyways, I'm still moving on to improve myself reading the guides by pook more in depth to more fully understand the fundamentals. Thanks for the advice guys!

First, welcome to SS. Keep learning and reading as we all are growing and learning new things everyday. Ask questions if you are confused too, most men on this forum will help ya.

From what I read, she doesn't seem to have high interest level in you. I know that stinks but trust me, it's great knowing that so you don't waste your time/efforts/emotions on her. She is leaving anyway after the summer so you can't really have a real/long relationship with her and that seems to be what you want.

It can be hard going no contact, you always think, well this next text will get them back bla bla bla. I've been there. The truth is, if a girl likes you she will make it easy for you to talk to her. Good job on not complimenting her.

Start talking to other girls in the library and around campus , keep your head up, we all get turned down and rejected, it's part of the learning progress

 

[G_Govan]

If you're forced to interact with her like passing her in a hallway or walking into her in class just be friendly and cordial. You don't want to give her the impression that you're doing any of this on purpose.

Keep things light. Just smile, say hello and keep it moving. Maintain no contact outside of situations you can't avoid.

 

[Infern0]

So a little update. But before I go on, let me just say damn you guys are spot on!

So today in class we were doing introduction on a subject and she introduces her boyfriend. I don't if it was true or not, but I'm gonna just assume it's true. She was dressed up today too with lipstick and all.

She never mentioned she had a bf so go figure. But anyways, I just played it off and didn't even care nor did I look at her much. I only did it using my peripherals and saw her doing the same lol.

But I was wondering, is there anything else I can do besides being nonchalant and non reactive. I know I was tempted to talk to her today and say she look good all dolled up, but resisted the dumb afc that wanted to break the no contact. Damn, I don't know how you guys manage to do no contact with a good looking girl as it's a struggle....for real!

Anyways, I'm still moving on to improve myself reading the guides by pook more in depth to more fully understand the fundamentals. Thanks for the advice guys!

Illusion of action.

No, there's nothing you can do except move on and explore other options, she just introduced her boyfriend, forget about it.

It's not going to happen, at least not now, you need to just move on, trust me

 

[gravityeyelids]

Just keep trying man. You'll start to pick up on what works and what doesn't. Good part

Post-Game evaluation: Your main mistake was being too open and friendly and opening up too much to her. You didn't leave anything for her to try to figure out about you and didn't leave any mystery to keep her interested.

It's fine to have frank discussions about relationships and sex with girls (and i would encourage it) with a few rules:
1) Never talk about anything that would suggest you're trying to have sex or a relationship or sex with her.
2) You'd be SHOCKED at how open a girl will be about her sexuality, even within the first hour of meeting her, however you NEED to be laid back about it and just discuss what you like, let her discuss what she likes.
3) Even though you tried to not be a tampon, you ended up letting the convo steer into both dark/depressing territory and letting her vent too much about her love life. YOU DONT CARE. You are there to entertain yourself and bring her into your reality. If she starts talking about weepy family issues either ignore her or change the subject. YOU are supposed to be the fun, flirty guy that makes her happy and makes her feel emotions, NOT the
4) As a rule: DON'T COMPLIMENT GIRLS you're trying to get with, especially not on anything physical. At least until you pick up on the rare occasions it can help you.
5) WHY oh why are you discussing the possibility of a relationship with her soon after meeting her when you havent so much as kissed or touched her? She should be the one wondering how you feel about her and hoping you like her and pushing YOU into a relationship.

You fvcked this one up. Which is FINE. It's a VERY good thing for a few reasons: 1) you weeded out a girl that's more trouble than she's worth, 2) You got rejected, which needs to happen many times for you to improve, 3) You TRIED and make some mistakes and you're starting to become more aware of your mistakes and why you've made them.

Now move on, there's plenty of great girls out there and it's only uphill from here.

 

[MoMoney96]

Thank you for all the encouragement all. Once I'm done studying the guides, I'm gonna sarge hard next week on campus. Tired of being the afc who is always wondering about that one good looking girl only to get rejected. Plan to have field reports next time.

I'm moving on for sure. It's just that in the back of my mind I was hoping there was stuff I could do to turn it around. Maybe I watched Hitch too much as it was a movie. Oh well.

 

[MoMoney96]

Ok, so for the sake of not making a zillion threads, I'm just gonna continue with questions and my journey in this thread.

So here's the scenario: next week I'm about to have an exchange meeting with a bunch of international students and I plan to be sociable and take over as it's been something I've been working on. They are going to be here for the summer so I wanted to work on being a sociable person and to be the go to guy for fun. I'm gonna be taking them out to all sorts of events all over the city.

However, the girl that I like will also be participating in this program, but I'm also in a nc with her. What should I do? I'm planning to steal her exchange partner as well to be the social guy.

Question: Should I also invite her to the party on saturday? She will know about it because I'm planning to let them all know and perhaps dhv myself because I'm gonna be taking them all.

 

[RangerMIke]

Okay... I'm just going to say it... you are focused on this one girl. NEVER EVER focus on just one girl.

Infern0 is correct there is NOTHING you can do other than to just try and get other girls.

 

[ucde]

I'm also confused about relationships. I will try to clarify your thinking from my own point of view.

Hi guys. Been a lurker for years, but I've decided to kill the AFC in me.

Please stop right there. Don't kill any part of yourself. You will need your entire self in order to become the person you're meant to be. Do not begin an internal war with yourself, as that can not lead anywhere useful.

Ok so I met this cute girl in class who is my type physically. She's also smart and has similar interests as me. I occasionally teased her and we have studied together at the library and I also took her out for some coffee. It was at the coffee session that we talked a bit to learn about each other (rapport and comofort), but unfortunately, I still suck at kino.

Forget kino, its a useless concept. The idea that you're going to feel up a person on a coffee date is PUA nonsense. Get the woman comfortable enough that touching her makes sense (in terms of how you both feel!) - then escalate. That should usually take more than 2 dates, if you're like me.

However, I did make good on the deep connection. So this is what I learned about her:

She has some issues with her family. Quite a rebel and moved from new york to san fran for school. Has issues with her parents. Also has issues with ppl judging her (looks). But she is good looking.

Don't worry about her personality or the facts of her life. You like her, that is enough. Don't analyze these facts, follow your feelings and instincts.

I tried to steer the conversation away from dark topics best I could without being her psychologist or tampon, but something felt off. We then started talking about her past relationships and she mentions she went out with her best friend and it felt weird. So I guess this is where I screwed up. I heard that and thought, "Well I better tell her now before I get ljbf" and told her you know your cute inside and out since she is pretty down to earth. She says she doesn't have time for a relationship right now and can't commit. I was not looking to get married or anything, so I told her let's just go out and see how it goes. No commitments. No big deal. She says she still wants to be friends and i'm like damn. I tell her, if we go out, know that I'll be hitting on you and rather than be a friend, I would prefer to be ambiguous. We end it at that and go home.

Do not be hyper alert about being 'friendzoned', thats PUA insecurity talking. If she agrees to meet with you, there is some potential there. For women, you being a 'friend' gives her room to maneuver, to check you out, to try you out without committing. Being a 'friend' is a very, very good first step. Don't let people tell you otherwise.

Zoom to next week and I can feel things sort of slipping away. I usually wait for her so we can walk out of class and either head home or library. Sometimes she will head home and I will split to library. One day at the library when she was leaving, I hugged her. She gave a really weak hug one handed. Thinking back, I should have took control and said that's weak and make her give me a real hug. After that, it just keeps going downhill.

That feeling you have, of things slipping away? Its a very useful tool. What you are feeling is what is actually happening in the relationship between you, generally speaking.

There is no way to 'take control' and make her give you a better hug. You cannot reach into her heart and plant desire in there. It has to blossom of its own accord or not. It sounds like you are looking to learn that Desire is King -- if a woman doesn't honestly, open-heartedly desire you, there is no Game, there is no nothing. If you have to ask for a better hug, no dice.

Anyways, I thought something is off so to prevent anymore stupid mistakes I've initiated no contact for now until I can figure out what to do. I don't text her or call her so that isn't an issue. It's usually in class. Maybe I'm still being AFCish by waiting on her to walk home or to the library even after all that. So what I did today was just leave earlier and didn't even say bye or anything to the library.

No contact is a two-edged sword, because its good for you to learn about relationships with women even if you don't immediately score with them. In other words, there are things you can learn from being 'friendzoned' by this person you find attractive. And no contact doesn't make women who aren't interested, more interested, generally. No contact, generally no workee.

Also, a weird thing happens to me. All the cute girls I ever want, I have a super difficult time getting. However, fml, I'm always attracting the ****ing pigs and bottom of the barrel ugly without any effort. In fact, yesterday night one of them texted me who wanted to "hang out today".

I can't really advise you here, because there are all sorts of interesting lessons you might be learning about human interaction and relationships, and it would be foolish on my part to want to steer you towards some path as if it were better than another path. There is no quick and easy way out of the place you are in, but with each woman, whether you kiss her, bang her or just get rejected -- each one teaches you something. As you grow older you will gain experience and its pretty much a given that this won't happen fast enough for your own liking, but it will happen, and one day you will be in a happy relationship with a decently hot chick, and look back on these days like "man, what a fun and crazy, difficult time". Good luck.