Lonely and just going through the motions?

[bobbob]

Hi, I posted a thread a while back on the general discussion, but felt the answers were pretty lame and unhelpful ... I probably should have posted it here.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=63899

Anyways, I went and asked her out for a 2nd date and got brushed off, so I gave up on her. But it's been a week and its still bugging me ... I can't figure out what happened.

My question is, during the date I kissed her and she didn't pull back, in fact I think I ended it after a while. Then when I dropped her off at the end of the date, she kissed me. Then the next time I see her, she's friendly, and hugs me goodbye. I'm wondering if she was just lonely and was just going through the motions, and was never really interested in the first place.

I'm trying to learn what went wrong, what lessons I can take from this, etc. Thanks

 

[cave dweller]

water.......

Bob,

Wake up....you are turning into a 'stalker'.
Forget her.
She has no interest in you........
'NEXT'

cave dweller

 

[bobbob]

Man ... all I asked is what happened, so that I can not make the same mistakes if I'm ever in the same situation. I have no plans on pursuing. Sorry if that wasn't clear from reading the words and stuff.

 

[Golden Arms]

Stop trying to analyze it and figure it out. The only way you learn is from more experience with different girls. Time to let this one go

 

[RiceHapa888]

hmm

dude its time to pack up on this man. women are messed up and if you read into each action you'll find something that'll get you down or in this case throw you for a loop. Look at the big picture and the big picture is that its over. Next time you need to line up 2 girls maybe 3 or if you are the **** 4-10.. You'll be in a better position and the next girls will pick up on that.

 

[flexion_]

Men and women think differently. That is why men can never understand women and the best way to deal with them is NOT to try and analyze what they say but rather what they do.

Looking at what they do is the only way to really figure out what is happening. Trying to analyze their words will just make you pull your hair out.

 

[bobbob]

Ya, you guys are right, I need to just stop thinking about her period ...

"Looking at what they do is the only way to really figure out what is happening. Trying to analyze their words will just make you pull your hair out."

That's what I'm saying, read the post right. I couldn't figure out her actions (kiss, hug, etc.)

 

[TheMainMan]

Same thing happened to me recently. Dated this girl, seemed very keen & got a good kiss.

She never got back to me afterwards but **** her. Life's too short to analyse the way women work.

Just move on to the next.

 

[NewMan]

It sounds like you passed the physical test - date 1 - but then fvcked up somewhere along the way.....

Look - that has happened to me, where I've gone out on a date with someone made out with them - but then decided I just didn't want to persue her because she didn't pass my requirements.

There are way to many variables involved for you to pin point the "why" of it.

Just realize that this one got away.

 

[Big Pappy]

What you did wrong:

...called the next day and she didn't pick up. I went to see her at her work place a couple days later,...

She said she'd call
she never called.

Here's my take on it. You came on too strong, too fast for her comfort. That's not to say you were wrong, just not right for her.

Her behaviour would suggest that she thinks you're a decent fellow, but you just don't float her boat. Perhaps she's one of those girls who hate to say no because they don't want anyone to feel bad. It happens all the time.

Promise everyone here that unless you are picking up the lady in question after work by her invitation that you will never visit any lady at work. That can get really creepy for a girl.

 

[parisaga]

Originally posted by Big Pappy
Promise everyone here that unless you are picking up the lady in question after work by her invitation that you will never visit any lady at work. That can get really creepy for a girl.

In fact...

Never EVER "surprise a girl" anywhere unless you're well into an LTR (6+ mos)... very invasive and potentially insulting of trust

It's like buying flowers... seems like a sweet idea until you actually do it and realize it SUCKS

 

[SIXPAKGQ]

Originally posted by flexion_
Men and women think differently. That is why men can never understand women and the best way to deal with them is NOT to try and analyze what they say but rather what they do.

Looking at what they do is the only way to really figure out what is happening. Trying to analyze their words will just make you pull your hair out.

even then she might be playing you