LOL We have problems approaching, they have problems approaching. Read on.....

[Kumar]

KillaPeteHog has me going, so I decided to check out the sappy site on over loveshack.org there I found this gem. It is kinda long but I did learn somestuff from this chick:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t89866/

Male co-worker

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Hi! I'm new to this site, and it seems very interesting

Well a have a question of my own, it's about a male co-worker. i'm almost 21 years old and I work in a grocery store, i've been there for about 4-5 months.

Anyway, i've been having some feelings for a particular co-worker, i don't know him at all btw, but i see him often (so i suppose it's purely physical at this point). However he seems to be quite a bit older then me (or so he appears)...he looks to be about late 30's early 40's. I realize this seems to be quite a difference, however i've usually been attracted to older men anyway...Now considering this age difference i'm not quite sure how to even begin to approach this man.

This may be a stupid question but can older men really be attracted to a much younger women? Or would they much prefer someone their own age? I'm not sure if i should even consider pursuing him for this reason. Before i even think of pursuing i'd really like to get to know him first, i just don't know how to approach him.

I feel so childish but he really makes me very nervous. I've had very little contact w/ him, all that has happened is this: i was at my desk (i'm a cashier btw, he is not though) and he was coming back from his break, and he seemingly went a round' about way through the aisles (seemed unusual + unneccessary) and came through my desk and managed to mumble out a "hi", though i was making no eye contact towards him, i was happy and surprised by this but no big deal.

Well, sometimes i catch him looking at me as i deal w/ customers and one time when i was free he just turned and stared at me square in the face until i turned away... i'm very shy so i barely even look at him. I don't even show that i'm interested whatsoever.

I realise this will get me knowhere though. Is it normal to be interested in someone and act that way (uninterested)?

Anyway, the only other thing that i can remember is that i was bending over to help a customer and when i got up i noticed he had been walking right there behind me, his face was turned and he was smiling. Again not that big a deal. So as you can see i don't know him. I'm just not sure how to go about talking to him. He seems nice enough.

My last relationship was not ended on a good note considering the guy i was dating was quite abusive, both physically and verbally. It's been quite some time since then so i'm a little skittish on the whole meeting men/dating thing.

So my question is what can i do about this older man? How can i approach him? Thanks for reading, i tend to pay attention to the details, sorry i know it can be painful/tetious to read. Thanks for any advice or suggestions, feel free to be perfectly honest!

I bolded the sections that jumped out right at me. Interesting don't you think.

K

 

[Tomatoes]

Think of this post everytime you are about to cold approach.....The girl WANTS you to approach her!

 

[Migel]

This may be a stupid question but can older men really be attracted to a much younger women?

OH MY GOD DDDD

 

[Stackthestyles]

LOL, this is cute... they let their fears run free over there, I wonder if any of them do anything about them

THis can also be classified under "women are people too" and "Don't put a woman on a pedestal"

 

[Kumar]

LOL, this is cute... they let their fears run free over there...

Can't help but picture us here at SS as hungry sharks and them over at the loveshack as the bait.

K

 

[d182]

thats gold! =D

 

[Kumar]

Man this is too much, check out this other's chick post.

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t90016/

Best Places to Meet People?

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I am not exactly a social butterfly, but I have been making soooooooo many attempts at "putting myself out there" and getting out more to meet people. I would like to make friends and even try and date guys while I am at it.

My results so far - failed. I don't get it.

I frequent coffeehouses, sometimes I attend this swing dance thing every Monday nights, I try and make small talk with customers at work, etc, etc. I don't have very many local friends, so I don't get to go out with them to other socialable places. The few friends I have are either busy, or I don't want to rely on them 100% of the time. I don't want to sound clingy or anything either. I mean, they have invited me to social outings, but I don't get a chance to mingle with other people nor do guys approach me.

Back to the coffeehouses - I try and smile towards guys I find attractive and want to approach, and I even sit in areas near people my age to try and socialize with them. No luck! They, usually the guys, are busy on their laptops, reading, or they are with friends or with girls or guys.

This is getting VERY frustrating for me, as you can imagine.

I don't get it. I just do NOT get it.... I am feeling like I am backed into a corner.

Sooooo my question - WHAT are some good places to meet people? I am mostly alone, so I am not much of a drinker and wouldn't even try going to bars alone. So that is out....

I work as a computer lab aide at my university, so I see a lot of people daily. There is one guy who is sweet and very nice and usually greets me, but I don't know about approaching him to get to know him. I haven't seen him in two weeks, so I don't know if he's still in that class. I have been thinking about attempting to get to know him more. But.... I don't want to just rely on him.

So, my main point is that I WANT to make friends AND also get to know some guys to date them. You know.... the whole conversation and socialization aspect.
I am usually a shy and especially quiet person, and I have always in the past been a homebody and non-socializer. I am finding this whole socialization thing to be a challenge, and it's bugging me.
So... ANY suggestions? Tips? Anything???

Thanks to anyone who can help!!!

Man, oh Man!! How did we miss this stuff??

 

[Blackdragon5095]

I got a idea. I can add that to the jounral tips but I need to type it up or have someone help me type it into a good article.

Oh yeah, good post. Showing how women think and about her fears. :rockon:

 

[FaithHealer]

You know I was thinking about this yesterday. We as men often think (especially when we were AFC's) that women have all the power. I realized yesterday that we can do what women can't--decide who we want! Almost all girls WAIT to be approached, so they are dependent on the guy's initial action. But we, as men, can talk to one girl after another. Even if you have no skills with women, maybe the odds are stacked in your favor??

Just musing,

FH

 

[Kumar]

Ok, you can't make up this stuff. Check it out:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t66105/

Meeting people in college was so much easier! Now I am 28, where do I meet people?

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It was so much easier to meet people when I was in college! If I work with all old people and nto really wanting to meet people in bars, where do 28+ people meet other single people?

Would it offend a guy to just walk up to them and talk to them in the gym, mall, restaurant? Isa that ok? A guy friend of mine said it would be flattering.

Any thoughts? I hear all of these people on here who do NC or break up and their exes are with people already???? They must be in their early 20's? Everyone my age does not seem to jump around so quickly? At least my friends.

When you are older, maybe your relationships mean more? Maybe you take them more seriuosly than you did at 19-20?

Just thinking outloud. Not saying people in younger relationships are not in love, just wondering if it is a different kind of love?

I've always had a problem with meeting people. The ones I would meet I didn't like.

So I tried the dating sites and that's how I met my two last BFs in the last two years. I liked it cuz I could see the things that interest me such as education, goals, writing skills, etc. At least I don't have to deal with married guys who want some fun or younger boys who think I should be happy to sleep with some young meat.

If a guy does not start up conversation w/ you, does that mean they are not interested? Or is it ok to start one w/ them?

I have tried online dating. I was unsure at first. I thought of it as my "little science experiment". Maybe you can think of it as your too. I meet the guy that I have been dating for a few months on there. I am in my mid-twenties as well. It is very hard to meet people. I wish you the best.

Everyone in my church is either married with 2.5 kids or old as can be!

I tried online dating last year and IT WAS HORRIBLE!!!!The guy picked me up(mistake) and took me bowling, got kicked out for betting(he did, not me) asked how I felt about him casue he was attracted to me...I was honest and said no. He started playing music about "jesus loves you no matter what" and CRIED!!! He text me all night how he would have treated me like a queen....I guess I could give it one more chance-the online dating, not him. I was just scared after that!

WOW! can you say AFC?

K

 

[Blackdragon5095]

LMAO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :crackup: