Lamest approach ever (IMO)....

[Chewy Bagel]

A little hotty came into the office today...I exchange a couple words with her and noticed that she giving me no signals.

I went on with my business and let her do her thing.

After she left, I told the person who she came in to see that I thought she was hot.

So what did he do?

He fvcking asked her if she wanted to meet me & that I was interested - without discussing it with me first! (BTW I'd never ask another guy to do that for me). She was all, "ummm sure, why not." Which is hot chick talk for "Yea, I want to do business with you again, so I won't turn your down."

Later today, she comes back in the office looking very uncomfortable and non-interested. She comes by my office and says, "we should "all" meet for drinks sometime." I just said, 'sure'.

Look, I know when a girl is interested. She wasn't.

Anyway, maybe this approach has worked for some guys, but it doesn't fly with me.

I think the girl automatically labels the guy a pvssy for not asking her out directly and it put us both in an awkward situation.

If you get anything out of this post, it's consult with someone first before you do something stupid on their behalf.

 

[Dictatorsaurus]

I have been in a similar situation many times. People always seem to talk on my behalf and make me look like a loser. By the time I'm aware of what has been said, it is too late to say or do anything to mend the situation.

 

[ShortTimer]

The guy probably knew exactly what he was doing: he wanted her for himself and used this "I'll ask her out for you becasue I'm such a great guy" tactic as a ****block to get you out of the picture.

 

[true|hockey]

Originally posted by ShortTimer
The guy probably knew exactly what he was doing: he wanted her for himself and used this "I'll ask her out for you becasue I'm such a great guy" tactic as a ****block to get you out of the picture.

I agree, gotta watch the competition sometimes. **blocking can be very subtile, and in this case, clever.

 

[Chewy Bagel]

I doubt it was a cokblock as the guy is married.

He just thought he was doing me a favor *rolls eyes*.

He apologize to me and said that he had been out of the loop on dating for a while and didn't know.

 

[Porky]

No guys...some people really are as clueless and stupid as the guy in this story. I've had friends walk in on me while I was with women (well, just one dumb guy several times, actually). He could have figured out what was going on if he'd put his mind to it.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

What he did wasn't too devastating - if she liked you do you think she would have a problem being set up?? NO!!

You would have never seen this girl again and it was the only way to meet. Just explain to her that you made a comment about her but your friend took it out of proportion and became a matchmaker.

If you have drinks together, don't ask for her number unless she brings it up first!

 

[Genghis Juan]

People are stupid

Most people are F'ing clueless, especially married folks. Its like once they get married their Dating IQ's go in the ****ter.

Don't tell people, girls or guys, whether you like someone or not. They will just screw things up. Just keep the interaction between you and her.

Example of stupidity:

My cousin got setup with a girl who is on and off again with her ex. They told my cousin to hang in there because she is a good girl. What are they morons? The girl, who is a selfish attention ***** is hanging on to two guys now. My cousin is AFC so there is no way he is walking away.

This girl may have been somewhat interested in you, but perhaps when she heard that you went through someone to talk to her, she might have seen that as weak.

 

[Craig Reeves]

That sucks.

 

[dietzcoi]

It could be worse, I was on a "pub crawl" bike ride with a bunch of male coworkers years ago, and the conversation got to our female coworkers. I made the mistake of telling the group that I thought my secretary was hot (as compared to the other women they were discussing). One of the AFCs then made a bee-line to her husband and started all kinds of difficulties for me.

Lesson learned: Keep your mouth shut, you cannot trust AFCs and they will use whatever you say to destroy you if they can.

Dietzcoi

 

[princelydeeds]

I don't think it was such a bad thing. If she had any interest whats so ever he might have put you in the game. If you don't know the chick and will never see her again what could his inquiry have hurt. You may not be the next superstar in her life but at least he gave you a chance to play.

In similar situations, I focus on the positives, no apologies, no embarassment. In a similar situation, I had the chick come up to me and say "Tom said you were interested in me," with a half bothered look on her face. I looked at her square in the eyes and said "yeah so what I think your cute, but you look like your stuck up." Snuck a little C&F in there, she said " Oh my goodness why would you say that,. everyones says that blah blah blah." I replied, "see we've been speaking for all of 5 minutes and we've already spent all that time talking about you and you say your not stuck on yourself?" From there it took me about a two days to bang the broad.

Focus on the positives look at it as an opportunity.

 

[Hypoxia II]

I was in a similar situation once.

I told a friend of mine i thought someone looked godd and blah blah blah. anyway he told her and now i was looking, and feeling, like a loser.

heres what i did. next time i saw her, we were both very uncomforatable, i pulled her aside and explained to her what i said and asked her what my friend said. i also acted annoyed as she told me what he had said. to my surprise a good convo started from this and an exchange of numbers. we saw each other a couple of times but things werent going to work out. but what matters is i let her know what was said and for some reason it worked to my advantage.

 

[Omega]

"Hi, I'm not exactly sure what my collegue mentioned to you the other day, I heard it had something to do with us. The truth is, I don't want anything getting between ourselves, because this is strictly business. From what he's mentioned, he was very misinformed, and he's been corrected and knows how to handle situations such as this in the future. Have a good day"

Then just walk away. That's what I'd do, make it look like I don't know exactly what he said, but still make it look like you kind-of know what's going on.