Just starting giving the cold shoulder

eatme

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I've got a bit of a situation a girl who's been a friend of mine for around 3 months. We mainly chat in person, and lately I upped the kino and hugs, and started making more sexual innuendos, etc. etc. She seems pretty responsive. I gave her a decent amount of attention yesterday, but today I completely cut it off. I didn't initiate one conversation with her, no kino, etc. I blew her off (nicely) a few times today. So she IM's me tonight, whining about how hard studying for final exams is. I tell her to take it somewhere else, and she signs off. Her male friend messages me, telling me that "She says she can't tell you anything without you getting offended."

I wasn't cruel or whiney, I just she should find a different person to whine to. Is her reaction par-normal in this situation? Was I too harsh?

Thanks DJ's
 

aftershock

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Why give her the cold shoulder rather than ask her out?
 

eatme

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We're just friends at the moment. I'm testing the waters
 

aftershock

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A better way to test the waters is to ask her out.

Your a DJ, not a jerk.
 

Giovanni Casanova

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Let's look at two ways of handling your situation and you tell me which one is the best. Okay?

SCENARIO #1:
After a long day of ignoring his female friend, eatme gets on his computer and finds her online.
CHICK: Hey there eatme!
EATME: Whatever.
CHICK: I'm studying for my final exam.
EATME: Who gives a flying f*ck?
CHICK: It's really hard.
EATME: Get bent.
CHICK: I'll probably be up all night cramming for it.
EATME: Do I look like someone who gives one single sh*t about you or your problems? Do I have a sign around my neck that says 'Come bug me with your sh*t'?
CHICK: Pr*ck.
EATME: B*tch.

Now, I realize that this is a major exaggeration of what likely took place, but I guarantee that this is how she saw the conversation. Now for something completely different.

SCENARIO 2:
After a long day flirting with his female "friend", eatme gets on his computer and finds her online.
CHICK: Hey there eatme!
EATME: Just can't stay away, can you? What are you up to?
CHICK: Ha ha... I'm studying for my final exams.
EATME: How's that going for you?
CHICK: It's really hard.
EATME: That makes two of us.
CHICK: I'll probably be up all night cramming for it.
EATME: You're so coming on to me right now.
CHICK: I must have your body.


Your choice, man. Continue to be a d*ck to her... it might work. Or you might lose a prospect AND a friend. In my opinion, there are more productive ways to go about things.
 

eatme

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Haha! Thanks man, that made me laugh a bit. Scenario 1, though exaggerated, looks much more preferable to Scenario 2. I was a total AFC a few months ago, and I don't really want her to continue thinking of me as an emotional Maxi-Pad. I'll tone the rudeness down, and flirt with her a little bit tommorow. No apologies though, she was being pretty *****y earlier today, and kind of deserved it. Gotta put her in her place.
 

Giovanni Casanova

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Originally posted by eatme
Haha! Thanks man, that made me laugh a bit. Scenario 1, though exaggerated, looks much more preferable to Scenario 2.
Really? Are you sure that you like this girl?

Here's a secret for you: You kind of get what you give in life. So if you're kind of an assh*le to this girl, then she's probably going to be b*tchy in response. Then if you take the assh*le meter up a couple notches, she'll dial up her b*tchiness, and that's a vicious cycle to be in.

You can let a girl talk to you without being an emotional tampon... the key is to steer the conversation in such a way that it's not all about you listening to her problems and being her personal Dr. Phil. But I will say this also... just because you don't want to be an emotional tampon does not mean that you can't listen to and care about her problems from time to time. That's part of caring about somebody.
 

aftershock

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Eatme, I do not mean to offend you. But you are f**ked in the head. You've been gaming her for THREE MONTHS! Gods sake you should have shagged her senseless by now.

HE WHO HESITATES, MASTURBATES.

There is MODERATION between being a tampon and being a jerk. This ellusive territory is where the DJ is. Find that territory.

****y, yes. ****, no.

I'm really at a loss here.

Giovanni, great post. Shame that your posting to an idiot, really!
 

VIVAlasVEGASBaby

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Originally posted by aftershock
You've been gaming her for THREE MONTHS! Gods sake you should have shagged her senseless by now.
He's 15; i think you're taking his post WAY too seriously. Besides he already said she was acting like a b*tch, BUT instead of treating her like shyt, you should try flat out ignoring her when she's being b*tchy. While i don't agree with treating women like shyt, i can imagine your overexaggerating the situation. If you think you're going to attract her by being an azzhole, you're mistaken...

Although hell this is high school, i've seen crazier shyt happen
 

aftershock

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Oh right, sorry I overlooked that he was only 15. Still, he should have at least made a move after three months. I assumed he was a bit older, especially since he mentioned final exams.

"you should try flat out ignoring her when she's being b*tchy"

:up:

Just make sure that you make a move later on in the week.
 

eatme

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Rudeness worked. I'm pretty sure that she was testing me, and I passed. Today she was really apologetic for acting up, and sat in my lap (She's got a great ass). Remember, I was a total AFC 3 months ago and didn't have any balls to do ANYTHING. People look at me differently now. I'm asking her out once exams are done, she'll say yes. Thanks DJ's.

Aftershock- Thanks for the tips man, but no need to get so vicious. I am still learning after all.
 

aftershock

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Originally posted by eatme
Rudeness worked. I'm pretty sure that she was testing me, and I passed. Today she was really apologetic for acting up, and sat in my lap (She's got a great ass). Remember, I was a total AFC 3 months ago and didn't have any balls to do ANYTHING. People look at me differently now. I'm asking her out once exams are done, she'll say yes. Thanks DJ's.

Aftershock- Thanks for the tips man, but no need to get so vicious. I am still learning after all.
Ah yea no probs mate. It's difficult going from AFC to DJ in highschool, much less in 3 months.

It still seems like your putting it off though - ask her out now, for when the exams are done is another idea that you may want to try. After all, this is high school. People are vicious - some guy might have the same idea as you, and she might say yes.

Good luck.
 

speakerbox

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My friend has been trying to switch from an AFC to a PIMP in what, well he still isnt there yet. Its been o i think around.....3 years. Beacause he doesnt apply himself.

Knowledge is useless, unless you use it.
 
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