I just broke up with my girlfriend of 6 months. When I started dating her I just found this site and about being ****y funny not showing jealousy and being unavailable. It worked like a charm and she would give me sex everytime I wanted so it was like everyday, but as I kept reading I started analyzing everything she was doing like her sh** tests and all anyway to keep this short I was going crazy trying to keep up this don juan thing it was just to hard pretending to be unavailable and not getting jealous cause she was starting to play the same game. I turned into the insecure afc and things went down hill from there. We had a lot of fights but last night was the last one. I wish I could give more details but right now I'm so depressed and I need some inspiring words can some one please help.
just broke up feeling really depressed
- Thread starter jacob
- Start date
This is something I still don't understand about this forum. It 'breeds' men to 'handle' women and help eliminate the possibility of 'heart break'. Ironically, even though men come here, learn the tricks and get a gf later, they are still in pain when sh!t happens (even though they have been bred to handle crap).
Jacob, the truth is not to delve too much into this don juan sh!t. seriously, its all about managing polarities, not concentrating on just one 'method'
Nevertheless, chin up. This is a lesson learnt and try and spend a lot of time reading on this website. Its got a wealth of knowledge, but you must be wise to pick the right stuff.
Not the end of the world, your depression will go away in a couple of days - what you'll be left with is pure knowledge and strength.
Chill out - life can only get better from here on.
BTW, are you indian by any chance? Kerala? If you are, then I may just be able to help you demystify the indian woman's mindset. I can't promise though - we are all learning
Jacob, the truth is not to delve too much into this don juan sh!t. seriously, its all about managing polarities, not concentrating on just one 'method'
Nevertheless, chin up. This is a lesson learnt and try and spend a lot of time reading on this website. Its got a wealth of knowledge, but you must be wise to pick the right stuff.
Not the end of the world, your depression will go away in a couple of days - what you'll be left with is pure knowledge and strength.
Chill out - life can only get better from here on.
BTW, are you indian by any chance? Kerala? If you are, then I may just be able to help you demystify the indian woman's mindset. I can't promise though - we are all learning
KontrollerX
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2005
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- 4,479
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- 182
Hey brother my condolences for your pain and if you need a lot of healing for this as I can imagine you do look up the poster feelingloved on here and read his gigantic thread about losing his ex and his trials and tribulations over that.
Also you should know you were doing the right thing with the DJ game as you can see it got you the success of having a pretty long relationship.
It only fell apart in my estimation because you stopped having fun with it and got tired out by the games.
Plus you hadn't totally killed that inner AFC which admittadly can be a damn hard thing to do.
I like Rollo's advice about defeating it though and that is "fake it till you make it" meaning you pretend to be a DJ, pretend to be a confident man who will be a slave to absolutely no woman and eventually before you know it you really are that man.
Thing with you was you let jealousy creep in and we've all been there but yeah a DJ doesn't get jealous and he doesn't chase em he replaces em.
Rollo also says the person with the most power in a relationship is the one who cares the least.
By letting on jealousy you lost your power and you can never do that with a woman.
Anyway most of us have come to agree that all women play games but there is a degree among them of games played.
Meaning some women are more games playing than others, some rarely play games and some are totally all about playing games as that gives them excitement and drama that makes them feel alive.
As a growing DJ I think you have to take gentle steps with this if you're goal is to get a real relationship out of a girl and that is find someone who rarely ever plays games and you've got yourself a good girl to use your newfound DJ skills on.
Its like in sports someone who is playing in the minor leagues suddenly isn't going to be able to compete succesfully in the major leagues it takes a lot of working to get yourself up to that level if you ever will be at that level and thats how it goes in the DJ game. You have to work your way up before you are ready for the incredible nonstop games player type of woman or even a woman that plays a lot of games but doesn't play them all the time.
Take some time bro, get your mind together, think of what you did wrong and don't repeat it for future relationships and since you are hurting so much right now be in a period where you don't jump into a new relationship right away as you could turn needy quickly and ruin that one too and it won't make you feel any better. You are in the healing mode and recovery process now brother.
Flings and one night stands for you only until you feel fully ready to take on the world and get a real relationship going again this time hopefully with a chick who doesn't play as many games as your ex.
Also you should know you were doing the right thing with the DJ game as you can see it got you the success of having a pretty long relationship.
It only fell apart in my estimation because you stopped having fun with it and got tired out by the games.
Plus you hadn't totally killed that inner AFC which admittadly can be a damn hard thing to do.
I like Rollo's advice about defeating it though and that is "fake it till you make it" meaning you pretend to be a DJ, pretend to be a confident man who will be a slave to absolutely no woman and eventually before you know it you really are that man.
Thing with you was you let jealousy creep in and we've all been there but yeah a DJ doesn't get jealous and he doesn't chase em he replaces em.
Rollo also says the person with the most power in a relationship is the one who cares the least.
By letting on jealousy you lost your power and you can never do that with a woman.
Anyway most of us have come to agree that all women play games but there is a degree among them of games played.
Meaning some women are more games playing than others, some rarely play games and some are totally all about playing games as that gives them excitement and drama that makes them feel alive.
As a growing DJ I think you have to take gentle steps with this if you're goal is to get a real relationship out of a girl and that is find someone who rarely ever plays games and you've got yourself a good girl to use your newfound DJ skills on.
Its like in sports someone who is playing in the minor leagues suddenly isn't going to be able to compete succesfully in the major leagues it takes a lot of working to get yourself up to that level if you ever will be at that level and thats how it goes in the DJ game. You have to work your way up before you are ready for the incredible nonstop games player type of woman or even a woman that plays a lot of games but doesn't play them all the time.
Take some time bro, get your mind together, think of what you did wrong and don't repeat it for future relationships and since you are hurting so much right now be in a period where you don't jump into a new relationship right away as you could turn needy quickly and ruin that one too and it won't make you feel any better. You are in the healing mode and recovery process now brother.
Flings and one night stands for you only until you feel fully ready to take on the world and get a real relationship going again this time hopefully with a chick who doesn't play as many games as your ex.
Looks like you were learning and using the techniques and realized that eventually it does not work. You were not able to capture the mentality of a DJ. Sounds like a cliché, but it starts from within. Being a DJ is a lifetime commitment. You might want to consider developing a stronger self, and not play games that eventually leads to more drama.
Learn and move on. Don't let this defeat you.
Learn and move on. Don't let this defeat you.
thanks for the support
thanks for the support my brothers I really need someone to listen and understand my pain. right now I need people to hang with for the new years celebration and I don't have much friends. I'm new to this site as far as posting or commenting but I seen a place where I can hook up with fellow Djs and go out together as wing men. need some info and advice on this. feeling lonely.
thanks for the support my brothers I really need someone to listen and understand my pain. right now I need people to hang with for the new years celebration and I don't have much friends. I'm new to this site as far as posting or commenting but I seen a place where I can hook up with fellow Djs and go out together as wing men. need some info and advice on this. feeling lonely.
Channel your excited feelings into positive thoughts and behaviors. You will attract women by being enthusiastic, radiating energy, and becoming someone who is fun to be around.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
I.A.F.Y.B.
Master Don Juan
Being a Don Juan is not for everybody. Some people get it while others still stuggle. Some people stay a Don Juan, others; go from DJ to AFC. As for you... You went from Don Juan to AFC. You have to BE a Don Juan 24/7 and you can't be pretending.
Remember, this is a lifestyle. It may be hard at first but, people who try and practice what they do all the time are better at it. It also takes experience and learning from your mistakes. What is your mistake? I'm not really sure but, you can look back and answer that yourself. Then, fix what you did or are doing wrong.
Now, you need to suck it up and start moving on with you life!
Remember, this is a lifestyle. It may be hard at first but, people who try and practice what they do all the time are better at it. It also takes experience and learning from your mistakes. What is your mistake? I'm not really sure but, you can look back and answer that yourself. Then, fix what you did or are doing wrong.
Now, you need to suck it up and start moving on with you life!
War Against Betaism
Master Don Juan
You need to adopt DJ mindsets, not DJ techniques.
Dongfu
Banned
- Joined
- May 22, 2007
- Messages
- 943
- Reaction score
- 5
The little games that must be played occasionally to reset the parameters of your relationship - where you stand - should be used sparingly. And, as it is women's nature to play games, they are often better at it. So, if you decide to go there, expect that she may retaliate in some way. In the end it is a battle of will, unless you can keep it as a lighthearted and friendly competition.