It's ending...and for the first time, I'm the one ending it...

[JCballin88]

Fellas I feel awful about this one, but I need reassurance.

Backstory: Met a girl at home (Western NY), we fell pretty hard and fast for each other...I got one-itis even though I had another plate...let that one fall to the wayside. In the midst of all this, I got an offer for a very exclusive internship down in FL...and internship that could lead to a pretty cool job with a pro sports team. I was having a little spat with this chick when I got the offer, so I took it without even hesitating. Anyways, made up with the girl, and we kept hanging out all the way until I left.

Despite the fact that I told her I didn't really want a full-blown LDR, it pretty much evolved into one with her. We missed each other a lot...so we started this pattern of texting during all our free time and then Skyping for like 2 hours a night. Finally I broke down and admitted to her that it was too tough for me...I couldn't spend all my very limited free time giving her the play-by-play of my life from 1300 miles away...it didn't make sense.

I was hoping she'd see the light and it would be a mutual thing - the hardest part is that she is actually planning on moving down here in May for college and to be near some family she has about an hour from where I'm located in FL. We both thought we could make it until then...but I just started having doubts...

So yeah...we've been going back-and-forth all week...of course the one day I told her I really think I gotta stop...she said she sent me a Valentine's Day care package which included a scrap-book of our best memories...said she spent hours on it but that "I should just throw it out now cuz it's meaningless." So that's due to arrive...probably tomorrow and I'm just feeling devastated. She is beyond devastated...but my gut is telling me I have to let her go...

There's more than one reason this doesn't make a ton of sense...but I just am feeling really horrible about hurting her...she keeps coming back saying "I think this could be amazing...you were always worth it to me..." It's like I'm giving her every reason to cut and run, and she's staying there. I'm so torn...

Help!

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Fellas I feel awful about this one, but I need reassurance.

Backstory: Met a girl at home (Western NY), we fell pretty hard and fast for each other...I got one-itis even though I had another plate...let that one fall to the wayside. In the midst of all this, I got an offer for a very exclusive internship down in FL...and internship that could lead to a pretty cool job with a pro sports team. I was having a little spat with this chick when I got the offer, so I took it without even hesitating. Anyways, made up with the girl, and we kept hanging out all the way until I left.

Despite the fact that I told her I didn't really want a full-blown LDR, it pretty much evolved into one with her. We missed each other a lot...so we started this pattern of texting during all our free time and then Skyping for like 2 hours a night. Finally I broke down and admitted to her that it was too tough for me...I couldn't spend all my very limited free time giving her the play-by-play of my life from 1300 miles away...it didn't make sense.

I was hoping she'd see the light and it would be a mutual thing - the hardest part is that she is actually planning on moving down here in May for college and to be near some family she has about an hour from where I'm located in FL. We both thought we could make it until then...but I just started having doubts...

So yeah...we've been going back-and-forth all week...of course the one day I told her I really think I gotta stop...she said she sent me a Valentine's Day care package which included a scrap-book of our best memories...said she spent hours on it but that "I should just throw it out now cuz it's meaningless." So that's due to arrive...probably tomorrow and I'm just feeling devastated. She is beyond devastated...but my gut is telling me I have to let her go...

There's more than one reason this doesn't make a ton of sense...but I just am feeling really horrible about hurting her...she keeps coming back saying "I think this could be amazing...you were always worth it to me..." It's like I'm giving her every reason to cut and run, and she's staying there. I'm so torn...

Help!

What in God's name are you afraid of? Perhaps having to resist the 'perks' that would come with working with a pro sports team?

Possible 'grass may be greener' opportunity with new women?

Let her move down for college but NOT in with you and take it from there.

You= doing your job.

Her=going to college

If it doesn't work she finishes college and goes back home. Simple.

 

[Johnnyventana]

I don't know. Unless you have 40 other chicks in line to nail you at this moment, wait it out. In other words, what's the rush? If before May, you meet your next dream girl, then bye bye to this one, otherwise see how it goes and don't blow your job opportunity.

Also do remember, or think about, that maybe this desire is based on the fact that you two can't have each other right now. Just keep that in the back of your mind. That too may be f'n with you.

 

[marmel75]

What exactly do you have to talk about every day for that long? I mean seriously, you are burning yourself out for really no reason...there just isn't that much stuff to talk about on a daily basis and why are you so available to her? You are feeling smothered because you are basically doing nothing but talking to her in your free time. Why? Do you have nothing else to do other than talk to her? Then why do it? Talk to her for 15 or 20 minutes and let her know you have to go. Maybe *gasp* skip a day without talking to her...

This is bordering on ridiculous, Imho.

Why doesn't she cut and run? She has you wrapped around her finger to the point you do nothing but talk to her...she can only dream of how she can control you once you are married