Its easy to just do small talk with girls..but..

[Deciever]

Hi, I've just registered today but I've been reading this site for awhile...I have a question.

I find that going up to a girl and saying hi, then try to start a conversation with them is really the easy part, but my problem is I just can't think of anything INTERESTING to ask her about, I mean who can't go to a girl and talk about any random stuff for a few minuties...its easy, but the type of the things you ask and talk about is the big problem..

For example, I'm in college, Today I was sitting and a hot girl came and sit next to me, I though that I should try to talk to her, I paused for a minute thinking about a good opener..but I just couldn't..then I found myself doing small talk asking about random/lame stuff regarding the class etc to try to pave the way for a good conversation...but after a couple of minuties I relized hw awkward is it and that I'm going nowhere with this lame bull**** so I stopped.

what I mean is...I really can't possibly raise the interest of a girl with doing a lame ass small talk conversation about random stuff about the situation...I mean...I always ask myself how exactly can a conversation using Ideas mentioned Here work with a girl...whenever I do this I just feel extremely lame and dorky and eventually quit the conversation...this just doesn' work with girls. you guys understand what I'm trying to say


And no, I'm not asking for a script, I'm just asking if there is a good way to become more "fast witted" when it comes to striking up conversation with random girls, and how to actually raise her interest..

any advices?

 

[becker]

This is difficult, only because if you're doing a cold approach, you're talking about just shooting arrows in the dark and hoping they hit the target. If you open with something that the girl just doesn't like, then it will fall faster than a hot air balloon without the hot air. However, I guess it's a good filtering tool as well, since you will at least find out right away whether you guys will be compatible in any way. The cold approach immediately tells the girl that you're interested as well, which sort of leaves the power in her hands. It's mostly physical as well to begin with.

I still think that despite this, it's maintaining the interest of the girl that seems to be harder. Girls can be demanding, and if you aren't on top of things all the time, they'll move on, especially the hot ones. I think that's why most guys will settle for a gal who's not so in demand just so they don't have to deal with that crap. To me, it's worth it if you don't like playing the game. Hot girls always have to deal with guys trying to mack on them, so they test you to weed out guys who are not worthy so they don't have to juggle too many at once.

 

[Deciever]

bump.

 

[bootlegger]

you just get them to talk about themselves.
Thats what people love to do.

When you allow people to talk about themselves, then they leave the conversation thinking what a great communicator you are.


Talk about her clothes, car, classes, major, food, work out, blah blah blah...

If you give the topic, she'll do the conversing.

 

[Miroku]

Bootlegger is totally correct; I do and think exactly as his post specifies. I'd like to add that when you ask questions, take care to make them open ended (i.e. who, what, when, where, and why) as it'll force anyone to respond with more than a 'yes' or 'no'. The more you get out of them, the more questions you can ask, until you're comfortable enough to basically lead them in conversation (typically about themselves, which you might find to be boring as hell). It also helps to tilt your head at a slight angle to the left or right, as that implies that you're connected with them (or in other words, that you care about what they're saying).

 

[MindOverMatter]

What people said, get her to talk about herself. Most guys will just keep the conversation focused on themselves until they run out of things to say and then there will be awkward silence. This is where you stand out, you ask her about her. It shows that you are qualifying her, that you're not self-centered, that you are interested, and that you have game. Plus you get to find out her interests along the way, which makes it all the easier to get to where you want to be.

Oh, and here is a personal MindOverMattertip. If you run out of questions, ask her who she thinks would win in a fight between mickey mouse and donald duck. No joke, did this a few days ago during one of my bus stop approaches, had a 5-10 min convo about this, had the girl laughing the other time and asking me if I was always this crazy. Easiest # close I ever did.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Your overall look and presentation/body-language should have a bit more emphasis then what you actually say(no Pimp-tite/Metro sh1t).


Make more comments instead of just asking questions and when you get a way "in" take hold of the convo.

Try to connect your subjects to one-another.Something I do is peak her interest with an observation on something personal to her and then slam the breaks on the convo so you can flip the tables on her.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

P.S. Keep the sexual comments and innuendo's to yourself.