Before you can be all ups, you have to clean up first. Now with my previous state it was nothing but being close to a drone just going day-in and day-out. Now my motto is “If it improves, go for it.” My room actually was at a point last week and weeks before where occasionally I would step on a foreign object – it would either hurt my foot or it would be crushed underneath it… and it was usually something significant. My car was the same way with the passenger and the back seat covered in thrown away homework, junk mail, and McDonalds carry-out bags. That was all changed over a February weekend when it was warm enough to clean out my car and my apartment. This starts off the little lesson of cleaning yourself up and making yourself presentable if you want to be successful especially in DJ’ing. If you don’t feel good about yourself, it’s going to be hard to get your spirits up.
Now that you know one step is cleaning up your place, go for the next step. Clean up yourself. If you shower less than once a day, then pick up the pace. I’ve had an acne issue for years because I found taking a shower a chore in many aspects – the towel cleaning, the soppy wet feeling of my hair over my next and upper back. I started taking a shower after exercising and haven’t had problems yet. Yes – you got to exercise again too. I actually did exercise for a long while last year but have gotten a few rolls in the downtime so I am working on knocking that off.
Another way of improving yourself is the wardrobe. I actually had a rotation of four pants, and it became three when the fold of one of my pants got in the path of a pair of scissors I was using to open up a package on my lap. I actually got enough clothes to up my ensemble by two rotations.
There is actually a special section of shy non-socialites that sit at the computer all day and focus on World of Warcraft or Counter-Strike: Source. Most likely you’re also many pounds overweight or underweight… and you’re wasting your time with just taking in sodas and microwavable foods. If you’re computer literate enough to know what a CAT5 cable is (the Ethernet cable for your internet), print this article right now, unplug that cable, and shut off this machine before continuing.
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And now that I’ve gotten your attention, ask yourself this as harshly as possible –
How can you be the master of your own destiny when you can’t even be the master of your own behavior, diet, or basic hygiene? Your life sucks if you can’t wait to get home from work or school so you can level up on your gnome warrior. You have to slap yourself in the face sooner or later and do a complete overhaul of your behavior. Some things you can, of course, cannot change overnight like your physical shape. But you can twist your attitude and behavior over a weekend like I did and that will in turn help out in other ways.
Now how the hell is anyone supposed to change their behavior or their attitude instantly? You’ve been in an academic class before where there were facts that had to be continuously pounded in your head in order for you to remember them. The perfect example would be a foreign language class where you can’t remember the word to its English counterpart and you overcompensate by actively repeating it mentally. And now you can probably note what that same word is instantly. The same goes with this… you learn how to do it… you stick with it… and then you become it.
It’s that simple. I can tell you right now it’s working very well for me so far.
Now let me tell you a situation that’s a real good example of learning to ‘play it cool’ and doing it subconsciously… which coincidentally happened after I cleaned up my act. There’s this one chick in my English class that’s quite cute and we had a nice talk at the bus stop last week after another class. (talk of course meaning the standard turning the conversation constantly into queries) There’s another guy sitting right next to her in class and I would typically get either pissed or jealous deep down inside if I saw this girl being happy and whatnot with someone else. But for some reason, I didn’t… I decided that if this guy wanted to play with her he could go ahead. I’m not saying this out of spite either, but this is the kind of person you’d find plastered on
HotChicksWithDoucheBags.com. Hell, either you or I could become that, but I’m trying not to. Anyways, I assumed that this girl went to the bus stop after every English class – instead, she leads my ass to the next door library. And I asked why we stopped, she explained… and I basically said with good tact that she was wasting my time. She giggled. And I walked out to the stop with the intention of just passing her up in the future. What sealed that decision was when I got on the bus there was another cute girl that was sitting in front of me. She looked my way, and I followed the rules of “not being the first to break eye contact.” I smiled calmly, and she smiled sweetly right back. So what I was using as forced optimism actually wasn’t so forced by the end of that bus ride. This situation actually has to do with both learning to being a Don Juan and actually learning a behavior altogether. So the chick in my English class I won’t be bothering with, and she’ll probably be getting DJ’ed by the douchebag anyways… And to that I’ll naturally say, “… So?”
Back to cleaning up your act… my guess is if you’re socially devoid that you’re obviously to the point of stroking the salami. There’s a certain psychological effect when one masturbates. As far as I know when it happens and it reaches its climax that there’s a sudden feeling gained and another lost – neither effect being good. Of course, you’re no longer horny but you’re all of a sudden sluggish… maybe tired. I remember someone else mentioning holding it in or dropping the frequency heavily and you’d be more lively and active. What’s funny is masturbation is kind of like smoking in which you need it to feel better or else you start going nuts. This is where you have to kick that login thinking to suppress the chronic beating off. It’s silly, it’s dirty talk, but it works.
Now how do you score yourself on how well you’re doing? Well, typically you have a score in competition that’s either wins or losses. Throw out anything negative that happens… because it’s easier to focus on anything bad that happens which completely overrides anything that may have went right.
I assume that you’re doing all this self-improvement in order to be able to talk to women and actually appeal them, so we’re going to transition into that part. What you have to remember is your image can help (and definitely hurt) your message in saying “I’m God’s gift to women.” Posture will do that, too. But someone looks at you, that message isn’t clear that you’re confident of yourself. Hell, I’ve looked at people and have rarely gone “Hey, that’s a cool looking person.” On occasion, I see a football player and notice that they have a funny shaped head or haircut. So can you look at yourself and say that you’re appealing enough to not have to speak? No. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror and say I’m that appealing. If you could, then why are you reading this? The major step is
INITIATIVE. People are obligated to respond when someone smiles or greets them. You smile at a cute girl, you can get two responses – she’ll give you that awkward “get me security” look or the smile back. With the former comes a chance that you’ve got a negative physical image which is probably bad facial hair or an offensive tee. If they smile back, that’s one point for you, Jack. If you have time for small talk then take the next step and just say “Hi.” If they’re good enough to smile back, that means they’re most likely going to be good enough to talk to you. And you’ve heard about this following thing from nearly every article you’ve read on SoSuave. Women love to talk about themselves… so keep the conversation a query about them and if you can – pull up something that relates to them as long as it’s not awkward. It’s not the insta-sex you were hoping for but it helps in boosting that confidence, clearing the nervousness, and educating how you
should act.
My room is a mess though, my whole apartment is... If things go right in a given night, then go to her place... or a hotel.