Is spinning plates all that necessary?

[AlphaNoob]

My dad had characteristics of a Don Juan. He was out there still in the game after her married my mom. This inflicted a lot of emotional pain on her and I was seen that through the years. This makes me feel a little guilty when I go after multiple girls or give them false hope. It always reminds me of how sad my mom was when we left my dad. I asked a girl out to prom for high school because all my other options didn't work and she was the backup. The prom went well, but I saw her growing attached so I withdrew contact. I didn't want to give her that false hope cause her a lot of emotional pain. But now that I see her, I see a little bit of that sadness in her eyes. Maybe I may have made her sad because I stopped contacting her. So the question is is it still alpha if I don't spin plates. Sure I might have to have more emotional stability if I am after only one girl at a time. But I don't want to like I'm a douchebag that plays with girl's emotions. What do you guys think?

 

[jurry]

You can spin plates in an honest way where you are being straight up with girls and not an a-hole stringing them along.

Its not necessary to spin plates of course but it serves the purpose of enjoying multiple women and keeping you from getting too attached or obsessed with a girl you do like prematurely.

Ideally you shouldnt need plates to be comfortable and unattached with women, but easier said than done..

 

[Bible_Belt]

I think the idea is to structure your life so that you have options. You don't necessarily have to date all of your options at the same time. Simply having them will help you not get the AFC scarcity mentality that destroys so many relationships, and I'm sure hurts a lot of female feelings, too.

 

[No.Danny]

It's not a mean of being a player. It's more of a crutch for the less experienced to realize his princess ain't that special.

 

[Rainman4707]

Yes, time is of they essence

 

[RangerMIke]

You can spin plates in an honest way where you are being straight up with girls and not an a-hole stringing them along.

THIS.... I am completely up front and honest with the women I date. I date other women and they are more than welcome to date other dudes. When I'm with them they have my full attention and I DO NOT talk about the other women I see, and they don't talk about other dudes.

They usually dump me because they are looking for something exclusive, which I'm not going to commit to, lost one last week to this and lost a girl a month ago because she wants to have kids.... I'm DONE with kids, so she's focusing on a guy that is willing. I'm glad for her.

Women come in and they drift out.... there are always others.

 

[Between_The_Lines]

Women come in and they drift out.... there are always others.

Exactly.

OP, it's not "necessary", no, but it's a great reminder to reinforce RangerMike's quote that I singled out above. If spinning plates is not really your thing, at the very least I'd advocate talking to and flirting with other girls to serve you as this very type of reminder (spinning plates lite, if you will). Don't weaken yourself because, for whatever reason(s), you feel compelled to commit to some antiquated relationship dynamic ("I would die without you, m'lady!"). You can be loyal and honest with a girl while also remaining conscious of the fact that she can be replaced.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

One of the reasons to spin plates is so YOU don't prematurely get attached to one woman who you may or may not have gotten attached to if you weren't seeing other women, and therefore had a CHOICE on who you wanted to see. *see Lesson 14 of 'Pook's 15 Lessons'.

However, like Jurry stated, you don't have to lie. Don't string them along by giving them false hope. Be up front, you'll be surprised.

"leave the woman better than when you found her" Add a little something to society.

Also, to help you sleep at night, as the adage goes: "a woman would rather share an Alpha than have a Beta all to herself"

She WANTS an Alpha, she DESPISES a Beta.

 

[BrainDamage92]

Ye its a prevention against a oneitis. But, I have this old coworker, I told him about the idea, he was like "Meh you spin plates but only until the next time some ho gets under your skin"