Is it me or are most people boring/anti-social?

[PeterNorthisawesome]

I dunno about most people, but I like to socialize and talk about anything. (Sports, Music, Movies, News, War, Religion, Sex, Dead babies... etc) I always loved when strangers would teach me something new or have an interesting story. Recently though I noticed that the people I talk to 16-25 year olds are boring as hell. It always turns out to be like an interview... me asking them questions hoping they would say something interesting that I can work with and advance the conversation. What surprises me is that 95% of them don't even return any feed back. Example... What did you think of the Pats game today? Oh it was awesome.... (Isn't it common sense to ask the other person's opinion?) Maybe people just don't give a f*ck about what others think and are selfish as hell. I would look around on trains and buses and see NO ONE talking to a stranger, everyone is doing their own thing being isolated and looking depressed. Anyone else experience this? Maybe I just don't know how to socialize. Oh well if that's the case I'm going to focus on my dreams and hobbies.

 

[seanchai]

Anyone else experience this? Maybe I just don't know how to socialize. Oh well if that's the case I'm going to focus on my dreams and hobbies.

Haha, I love this attitude. In my experience people just don't have much to say. Maybe stop asking questions and speaking open-endedly, and they'll ask you questions?

 

[Obsidian]

Well, we all know that girls are less interesting than guys. But common sense also tells you that most people will be fairly dissimilar from you; you will have difficulty relating to these people in a way that both of you find interesting.

But yeah, most people definitely don't give a f*ck what others think. In the dating game, you should use this to your advantage to AVOID talking about yourself in serious depth. It makes you more mysterious and also helps you qualify the other person better.

If you've read How to Make Friends and Influence People, then you already know that most people's favorite topic of conversation is themselves. (I consider myself an exception, as I don't like talking about my own life all that much.) So let other girls/guys talk about themselves if you want to carry on a convo. Even then, it doesn't always work, but it's your best chance.

 

[Yapper]

I bet you'll find most of these "boring" people are a totally different personality interacting with their friends and stuff. They don't give a f*ck about you and/or you are engaging them in a way they don't relate to.

I guess it does come down to social skills. Somehow you have to appeal to their self-interest.

 

[ChrizZ]

9:00 - Get up
9:15 - Make Coffee
9:20 - Shower & Get Ready
10:00 - Goto work/school
12:00 - Eat Lunch
5:00 - Finish work/school
6:00 - Watch TV
7:00 - Chat on phone about TV personalities
8:00 - Drink a beer
8:30 - Possibly fit in sex
9:00 - Goto bed

Repeat for 40 years.

Thats about the extent of most people's lives.

Sad. Sad, but true...

 

[Ace of Flames]

Of all the truths of the world, I hate this one quite a lot.

I have a class at college called Interpersonal Communications. That basically means 'talking with other people', for those that don't know. Now, check this out:

NO ONE FVCKING TALKS IN THAT CLASS!!!!

How ironic is that?! Really, only 3 people ever say anything in that class, including myself. Otherwise, people only speak up when the teacher asks them a direct question. I haven't even heard the voice of over half the people in there. And I've tried to get something outta these people, but nothing. I'll ask something out loud like "So what did everyone do over the holiday weekend?", but it just floats away with no response. I'm starting to go a little crazy in there.

 

[speakeasy]

I don't think there are many truly boring people. Most people that seem boring probably just aren't being fully revealing about themselves because they aren't on that comfort level with you. I don't think there's a person alive that doesn't have interesting stories to tell, some knowledge or insight you've never heard, overcome tragedy, travelled somewhere you may have never heard of, fought a war, have bizarre sexual fantasies, cheated on a spouse, fell from glory, etc etc. You just don't know what story people have to tell unless they are comfortable enough with you to open up. I think just about everyone is interesting in some way, the thing is, I'm not always interested in talking to them long enough to find out if I don't connect right away.

Here's the thing though...take any two humans on earth, put them on a desert island together for a month and they'll have all kinds of interesting stories and conversations when they have nothing else better to do than to talk.

 

[comic_relief]

You've never dated a university girl have you... The extent of their life is what types of coffee they've tried at star bucks and whats new on the top 20.

I find almost 90% of NORTH AMERICAN people have nothing interesting to say because they haven't lived much past school/work and the occasional family road trip. Alot of people also have 0 interpersonal skills, they walk around with an ipod stuffed in their ears and a coffee cup in their left hand.... so some of what you're saying could be right speakeasy.

I HATE when people walk around with their headphones on listening to their music when they could be conversing with new people and adding depth to their life. Of course, most people live in their little dome life that has no dangers.

I swear most people don't take any risks at all.

The average university conversation centers around getting drunk, school work, or how OTHER people are doing. It has nothing to do with stories of their own life. That is why DJ's have it so much easier because DJ's should be doing fun and/or exciting. People just frighten me to death because of how damn boring they are

It confuses the hell out of me. How damn boring.

My roommate is awesome. He is from Philly, poor, and always has funny stories about his life. He goes and hangs out with people that not many other people would associate with.

On the other hand, my other friend is from Cape May, New Jersey with rich parents, and had his life handed to him. He has no stories of any kind and has very few friends.

The big difference between them is that my roommate has had a hard life, while my other friend had it so friggen easy. Adversity is what breeds funny stories.

My roommate and I can go for hours telling each other stories of the dumb sh!t that we had to go through and his worse story is that "I lost my one friend for a summer, but then we got back together and were friends again."

I believe that the reason that people and general bore me is because they have complacent lives. No real victories or defeats. No highs or lows. You need them. I just wish that people would just take a damn chance. Thats what makes life worth living.

rant done

comic_relief

 

[Obsidian]

I bet you'll find most of these "boring" people are a totally different personality interacting with their friends and stuff.

Some of them, maybe, but "most" of them? No, most of them really are boring.

 

[foxhound87]

What I have noticed since Iv'e been in North America is that people are far more anti social than they are so in Australia. It's dog eat dog here, every guy think's he's a gangster and most of the blokes here have not got a clue how to talk to girls. (Just makes it 10 times easier for me...) Lots of people also have a look on their face as if they have just eaten a **** sandwhich or something. Also most of the girls, are over weight and over confident. This is just my 2 cents, you guys might have a different opinion. (BTW I am in Canada, I imagine that the states is worse?)

 

[speakeasy]

Yeah, probably is worse in the states. My general of impression of Aussies is that they really like to have fun, usually talkative and sociable, down to earth. I've met Aussies from the U.S. to Italy to Thailand and I can say I never met an Aussie I didn't like.

 

[Obsidian]

I somewhat agree with your assessment, foxhound, but I also hear that there are more hors in Australia

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Recently though I noticed that the people I talk to 16-25 year olds are boring as hell. It always turns out to be like an interview... me asking them questions hoping they would say something interesting that I can work with and advance the conversation.....,Maybe people just don't give a f*ck about what others think and are selfish as hell.

No, it's because this demographic has been so insulated from face to face contact, they freeze like a deer in headlights when someone initiates a conversation without the buffer of MySpace, Facebook or an IM program to comfort them. They have little need to develop any interpersonal skills.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19876812/site/newsweek/

 

[comic_relief]

No, it's because this demographic has been so insulated from face to face contact, they freeze like a deer in headlights when someone initiates a conversation without the buffer of MySpace, Facebook or an IM program to comfort them. They have little need to develop any interpersonal skills.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19876812/site/newsweek/

why is it youth of the american and world culture keep getting worse and worse. I like the fact that I barely play video games anymore (30 minutes or less a day). Usually this is just a relax period while my friends are at class or somewhere, when I don't have anyone to chill with at that moment or I am caught up on school work.

thank god for sosuave. I would have been a boring normal person without it.

comic_relief

 

[Mad Manic]

My opinions:

- A lot of 16-25 year old North Americans/UKers are quite generic and boring. Just a bit of chit chat about alcohol, talking about others (hypocritically) and general stuff. However, they have the potential to be opened up and not so boring AND from experience, they can be more interesting than usual if you know how to trigger buttons. But they don't have the skills to do that to others!

- This age range in America/UK are quite anti-social. IPods, coffees, internet, binge drinking, hostility, bullying and all sorts. They are also more arrogant than other age ranges, they subconsciously believe their time is more valuable than other age ranges. e.g.) Is an attractive 21 year old female as willing to talk to you, on average, compared to an 80 year old male?

- Most people, live very boring and generic lives. Very routine like, very predictable, as outlined above. Even the attractive girls who have stupidly high social value thanks to media, social conditioning and the male mind still live quite generic lifes, albeit a bit better than most.

- Try and not to become a socially conditioned robot like so many are. Talk to people, approach women, be an interesting conversationalist, be confident, look good, have hobbies and interests, see the bigger picture, etc. Sosuave should help, but apply more than read is your best bet.

MM

 

[comic_relief]

- Try and not to become a socially conditioned robot like so many are. Talk to people, approach women, be an interesting conversationalist, be confident, look good, have hobbies and interests, see the bigger picture, etc. Sosuave should help, but apply more than read is your best bet.

MM

beautiful post. I love it! (unfortuanately)

comic_relief

 

[Luthor Rex]

No, it's because this demographic has been so insulated from face to face contact, they freeze like a deer in headlights when someone initiates a conversation without the buffer of MySpace, Facebook or an IM program to comfort them. They have little need to develop any interpersonal skills.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19876812/site/newsweek/

http://www.getafirstlife.com/

 

[DrMetallica]

I bet you'll find most of these "boring" people are a totally different personality interacting with their friends and stuff. They don't give a f*ck about you and/or you are engaging them in a way they don't relate to.

Oy! This be true... Im not gonna just talk to any old wanker on the street...