Is Instagram required at this point?

Sinn

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For context today was my third cold approach where I got hit with the Instagram request.

Walked in the grocery store to pick some stuff up and saw the cashier girl giving clear ioi's . Went through her lane and chatted for a few minutes before I asked for her number. She hits me with "Do you have Instagram?" I say no I don't have it and she proceeds to show me her iphone that has 58 unread messages. She tried spinning it like she didn't want to miss out on getting my text but at that point I'd had enough. If she was as interested as she appeared she would have still made the effort to take my number so I just cut my losses again.

Is this where we're at? Social media has become a requirement? Just a few years ago not having Instagram worked well for me and women were intrigued by it, now all the women I'm interested in dating basically can't live without it.

To me its on principle to not use it, more often that not you'll end up as just another "DM" in a girls sea of followers but it seriously seems like you're handicapping yourself hard by not using it at all.

Rollo and F&F have talked about this with genuine desire and relationships. If a woman desires you she'll delete her Instagram because we know exactly what shes using it for. So I have to jump through hoops and use it only for my end goal as part of good LTR is for her to get rid of it? Seems like a pain in the ass.

I get its a numbers game but having to make an account on a cancerous app is something that really makes me question my own methods.

Your thoughts?
 

behimo

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some call it game, some call it frame. what you're experiencing seems to be about that.
if you don't have an instagram, I wouldn't get one just to appease or supplicate to them and also enter their frame.

yeah, social media is a requirement for most women since it's a instant form of validation without much risk nor judgement.

keep your frame, it's a numbers game, find the one that works with you. Otherwise you'll always be enslaved to their whims.
 

Bigpapa

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For context today was my third cold approach where I got hit with the Instagram request.

Walked in the grocery store to pick some stuff up and saw the cashier girl giving clear ioi's . Went through her lane and chatted for a few minutes before I asked for her number. She hits me with "Do you have Instagram?" I say no I don't have it and she proceeds to show me her iphone that has 58 unread messages. She tried spinning it like she didn't want to miss out on getting my text but at that point I'd had enough. If she was as interested as she appeared she would have still made the effort to take my number so I just cut my losses again.

Is this where we're at? Social media has become a requirement? Just a few years ago not having Instagram worked well for me and women were intrigued by it, now all the women I'm interested in dating basically can't live without it.

To me its on principle to not use it, more often that not you'll end up as just another "DM" in a girls sea of followers but it seriously seems like you're handicapping yourself hard by not using it at all.

Rollo and F&F have talked about this with genuine desire and relationships. If a woman desires you she'll delete her Instagram because we know exactly what shes using it for. So I have to jump through hoops and use it only for my end goal as part of good LTR is for her to get rid of it? Seems like a pain in the ass.

I get its a numbers game but having to make an account on a cancerous app is something that really makes me question my own methods.

Your thoughts?
yeah, it is not only important to have instagram but it is also as important to have a nice profile too

women just want to see what you are all about and insta is the easiest way to make an impression fast

makes no sense to be buthurt about it, things are how they are and going against the wind will hurt you

a woman if she is active on insta ( like the vast majority are ) will never accept to delete their profile for a guy

the only time when they would consider this is when they will become ugly as they will not want to expose themselves anymore

almost any decent woman is at least mildly active on insta :)
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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I use IG so as not to give out my telephone number. My phone number is private, my IG is public. Only VIPs can call/message me on my phone, but every woman who wants my contact info gets my IG.

I have the type of IG account that doesn't require a woman to follow me in order to message me on IG, so it's discreet and I can check often check out their photos to see who I'm dealing with, so it's a good filter. And IG is on my phone as well, so I can easily chat with women on IG like I chat with my friends and lovers on Whatsapp or Telegram.

As for having an interesting IG profile, that is only for people who are looking to impress women online, like through dating apps, et cetera. My IG is photos taken of me and my cat (mostly by other people) and typewritten poetry. So for people browsing IG for lovers I'm not interesting, which is fine by me. I don't feel the need to impress with my social media footprint, so I don't care about getting followers. Most people who actually have stuff to do in their life don't spend that much time on IG.
 

Bigpapa

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I use IG so as not to give out my telephone number. My phone number is private, my IG is public. Only VIPs can call/message me on my phone, but every woman who wants my contact info gets my IG.

I have the type of IG account that doesn't require a woman to follow me in order to message me on IG, so it's discreet and I can check often check out their photos to see who I'm dealing with, so it's a good filter. And IG is on my phone as well, so I can easily chat with women on IG like I chat with my friends and lovers on Whatsapp or Telegram.

As for having an interesting IG profile, that is only for people who are looking to impress women online, like through dating apps, et cetera. My IG is photos taken of me and my cat (mostly by other people) and typewritten poetry. So for people browsing IG for lovers I'm not interesting, which is fine by me. I don't feel the need to impress with my social media footprint, so I don't care about getting followers. Most people who actually have stuff to do in their life don't spend that much time on IG.
no one really cares what you do

you are many steps ahead of us by just having the ability to invoke naked women directly into your bed. All of us are just jealous :)
 

savi0r

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For context today was my third cold approach where I got hit with the Instagram request.

Walked in the grocery store to pick some stuff up and saw the cashier girl giving clear ioi's . Went through her lane and chatted for a few minutes before I asked for her number. She hits me with "Do you have Instagram?" I say no I don't have it and she proceeds to show me her iphone that has 58 unread messages. She tried spinning it like she didn't want to miss out on getting my text but at that point I'd had enough. If she was as interested as she appeared she would have still made the effort to take my number so I just cut my losses again.

Is this where we're at? Social media has become a requirement? Just a few years ago not having Instagram worked well for me and women were intrigued by it, now all the women I'm interested in dating basically can't live without it.

To me its on principle to not use it, more often that not you'll end up as just another "DM" in a girls sea of followers but it seriously seems like you're handicapping yourself hard by not using it at all.

Rollo and F&F have talked about this with genuine desire and relationships. If a woman desires you she'll delete her Instagram because we know exactly what shes using it for. So I have to jump through hoops and use it only for my end goal as part of good LTR is for her to get rid of it? Seems like a pain in the ass.

I get its a numbers game but having to make an account on a cancerous app is something that really makes me question my own methods.

Your thoughts?
I'm in the same boat. I hate social media and all that is doing to the society. Even when i had it, i didn't post or make stories or stuff like that. I proud myself for not being a social media addict, but it seems i'll have to use at least instagram to not give the "creepy" vibe to girls i meet. Everyone is using it, girls talk about it, maybe the right question is how can we turn it into an advantage. I honestly think if you are a cool guy and ask for some help when making your profile, you can benefit from it.
 

mikedee

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I use IG so as not to give out my telephone number. My phone number is private, my IG is public. Only VIPs can call/message me on my phone, but every woman who wants my contact info gets my IG.

I have the type of IG account that doesn't require a woman to follow me in order to message me on IG, so it's discreet and I can check often check out their photos to see who I'm dealing with, so it's a good filter. And IG is on my phone as well, so I can easily chat with women on IG like I chat with my friends and lovers on Whatsapp or Telegram.

As for having an interesting IG profile, that is only for people who are looking to impress women online, like through dating apps, et cetera. My IG is photos taken of me and my cat (mostly by other people) and typewritten poetry. So for people browsing IG for lovers I'm not interesting, which is fine by me. I don't feel the need to impress with my social media footprint, so I don't care about getting followers. Most people who actually have stuff to do in their life don't spend that much time on IG.
but you feel the need to impress everybody here with your BS.
 

logicallefty

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but you feel the need to impress everybody here with your BS.
If you think what he posted is BS, you are entitled to your opinion. But you publicly calling it "BS" does not contribute to the topic in a productive manor.
 

Tilex

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Her: "Do you have instagram? "

Translation: "Do you have an app where I have total power & control over you?"

You can't win this game if you say yes.
It's a major sh!t test.
You gotta say something ballsy at this point because she's trying to suck you into her frame.

"How about we quit wasting each other's time and give me your fvcking phone number."
 

SW15

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Her: "Do you have instagram? "

Translation: "Do you have an app where I have total power & control over you?"

You can't win this game if you say yes.
It's a major sh!t test.

You gotta say something ballsy at this point because she's trying to suck you into her frame.

"How bout we quit wasting each other's time and give me you fvcking phone number."
Great answer! Instagram is bullshiit. Iron Rule of Tomassi #1 is control the frame.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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Translation: "Do you have an app where I have total power & control over you?"
How do you mean? Control over what exactly? What's the difference between Whatsapp and IG messaging? Except that IG doesn't require giving out your phone number?
 

sangheilios

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@Sinn I think a lot of women use this line without it meaning much. It's like they can give you a way where you two can "connect" but without her giving you her phone number and a means to actually reach her lol. A lot of women don't really know how to reject men and instead utilize these indirect lines. She also may just be looking for attention, more followers, etc.

I steer away from IG girls & women too addicted to social media and have not regretted it one bit.

Yeah, I've found this to be a massive red flag with people in general, not just with women I may be interested in. With women, I'd also be wary of the fact that they are very likely attention *****s that are regularly leading on tons of men. Chances are, she is doing the same exact **** to you lol. A lot of guys would delude themselves into thinking they are somehow "special" or "unique", when in reality she is just playing them for attention.
 

MatureDJ

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For context today was my third cold approach where I got hit with the Instagram request.

Walked in the grocery store to pick some stuff up and saw the cashier girl giving clear ioi's . Went through her lane and chatted for a few minutes before I asked for her number. She hits me with "Do you have Instagram?" I say no I don't have it and she proceeds to show me her iphone that has 58 unread messages. She tried spinning it like she didn't want to miss out on getting my text but at that point I'd had enough. If she was as interested as she appeared she would have still made the effort to take my number so I just cut my losses again.

Is this where we're at? Social media has become a requirement? Just a few years ago not having Instagram worked well for me and women were intrigued by it, now all the women I'm interested in dating basically can't live without it.

To me its on principle to not use it, more often that not you'll end up as just another "DM" in a girls sea of followers but it seriously seems like you're handicapping yourself hard by not using it at all.

Rollo and F&F have talked about this with genuine desire and relationships. If a woman desires you she'll delete her Instagram because we know exactly what shes using it for. So I have to jump through hoops and use it only for my end goal as part of good LTR is for her to get rid of it? Seems like a pain in the ass.

I get its a numbers game but having to make an account on a cancerous app is something that really makes me question my own methods.

Your thoughts?
It's OVER for NoInstagramCels.
 

Bigpapa

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@Sinn I think a lot of women use this line without it meaning much. It's like they can give you a way where you two can "connect" but without her giving you her phone number and a means to actually reach her lol. A lot of women don't really know how to reject men and instead utilize these indirect lines. She also may just be looking for attention, more followers, etc.




Yeah, I've found this to be a massive red flag with people in general, not just with women I may be interested in. With women, I'd also be wary of the fact that they are very likely attention *****s that are regularly leading on tons of men. Chances are, she is doing the same exact **** to you lol. A lot of guys would delude themselves into thinking they are somehow "special" or "unique", when in reality she is just playing them for attention.
I do not think that getting her phone number instead of her instagram makes any difference

worst case scenario she was not interested from the get go in you so you will either gain another follower yourself or she will never follow you back and know right there that she is not interested in you at all

sure an interested girl will have no problem giving you her phone number, but at the same time an interested girl will not become uninterested because you asked her insta instead of her phone number

I think that instagram, if you are at least mildly socially active can boost your shot especially with the so so girls, as she will see that actually you are an interesting guy and might reconsider you
 

AmsterdamAssassin

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I think that instagram, if you are at least mildly socially active can boost your shot especially with the so so girls, as she will see that actually you are an interesting guy and might reconsider you
Whereas your phone number will be just one of the many crowding her phone for attention. At least you don't have to remind her who you are if she has your IG.
 

Sinn

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She showed you 58 unread messages? From different people? So she gives her number around but not to you specifically, interesting.
No she showed me the home screen with 56 over the text icon on iphone. I've seen people I know personally with that if they subscribe to a bunch of **** they get texts.

Either way I knew what was up, If a girl does not immediately say yes I'm out.
 
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