Incoming friendzone..how to avoid

Leporello

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This is a follow up to this post:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=132902

Basically, contacted a girl online, we traded e-mails, seemed to get along, until she mentioned that she 'was just looking for friendship, not a date'. She has not mentioned having a bf.

In my personal experience, 'looking' for either of those things is counterproductive since they can't be forced (Then why did you go on a dating site? Shut up, that's why). And anyway, you can't pre-decide not to be attracted to someone before you meet them.

SO, I convinced her to come to a concert with me on Sunday (she said she had a paper to write, but it didn't take much persuading). I need some tips on how I can make her forget what she said earlier and open up to the idea of a sexual relationship with me WITHOUT trying to go too far too soon.
 

Leporello

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C'mon, gimme your best shot.
 
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"LJBF" doesn't mean anything from my experience. A girl told me that last week and I took her out and sexed her all night. She is still telling me "LJBF".
 

Maxtro

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Uh, I guess flirt with her, play with her and use kino? Thats all I can come up with. Make out with her than call her your best friend.
 

dav22

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Tell her you wanna be friends too, that'll piss her off.

Then carry on your game.
 

EFFORT

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Yeah just run standard game. Also stop listening to what women say. She should be reacting to you instead. Don't be needed, be indifferent when you see her(the way you'd acted if you had a harem of 10 playmates at home waiting for you) . Have a fun time when your out, offer value, let her see what your about.
 

marinetti

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tell her you find her sexy. vamp up the conversation. if you talk about platonic things all night then you'll be a friend forever.

i'd say that, by agreeing to go to a concert, you've convinced her to give you a chance. Don't blow it by being a "friend." This is your moment to show her how fun you are, to connect with her, and to prove that you're a better man than her boyfriend.
 

Leporello

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marinetti said:
tell her you find her sexy. vamp up the conversation. if you talk about platonic things all night then you'll be a friend forever.

i'd say that, by agreeing to go to a concert, you've convinced her to give you a chance. Don't blow it by being a "friend." This is your moment to show her how fun you are, to connect with her, and to prove that you're a better man than her boyfriend.
Hmm, might be a little too much to just come out and call her sexy, though it IS a classical concert and she'll probably be a little dressed up.

Oh, and to date she hasn't mentioned having a boyfriend. You'd think if she did (or if she didn't, but just didn't want me to hit on her) she'd have mentioned him by now.
 

marinetti

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call her sexy when she portrays her personality, not when she dresses up.

are you the fan of classical music? is she? let's do a quick breakdown:

If you ARE but she's NOT, explain how some of the music makes you feel. Ask her how it makes her feel. Tell her you think it's sexy that she's open to new experiences.

If you AREN'T and she IS, then make some statement ("Wow, that song was so fast and upbeat, I feel like I want to go run a marathon now. What do you think?") You're aiming for an answer that shows effort on her part, something where she truly is trying to let you know what she thinks. Then tell her you think it's sexy how passionate she is about music.

It's her personality you want to find sexy, not her body. Every guy in the world finds her body sexy. But one man in a million will find her personality sexy.

Oh, and when you tell her she's sexy, don't wait for a reply. Immediately change the subject. Just ask what the next song is, or where a good place to hang out in the area is. Have an idea yourself in case she doesn't. Lead, don't follow.
 

Leporello

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We're both into classical music.
 

marinetti

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talk about what musicians and pieces you're most passionate about. ask the same from her. ask her to explain how she feels about whatever piece. tell her you think it's sexy how well she can relate her feelings to you.

take her home. play your favorite piece. xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
 

Axcell

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Wow, it sounds like you may have already ruined your opportunity to get her. When she mentioned that she is not interested in a relationship, what did you say? Because it seems to me like she is already the "prize" in the friendship you guys have established between each other, which is NOT a good thing.

Be a man, start to become the prize. The next time you make a slight move and she reminds you that she does not want a relationship you make sure you tell her that you do NOT want one either. Women want what they can't have. The moment they realize you want them, they will not want you anymore. It's as simple as that.

Just use ****y humor on her and when you talk with her, make it seem like she is always coming onto you.

Hope that helps. ;)
 

marinetti

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i dunno if it's a lost cause or not. i think it's still possible.

no harm in trying after all, and besides, we all need calibration practice.

be a charming sexual guy, and if she won't dump her boyfriend, be sure you're the guy she calls when she breaks up with him in the future!
 

Leporello

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marinetti said:
be a charming sexual guy, and if she won't dump her boyfriend, be sure you're the guy she calls when she breaks up with him in the future!
Am i missing something? Why do you keep mentioning the boyfriend she never claims to have?
 

marinetti

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maybe i'm missing something. somehow i thought she was in a relationship.

although odds are that, if she's only looking for friendship, she IS in a relationship, or at least getting something on the side. virtually all women of quality are in the process of getting together or breaking up with someone at all times.

none of that matters to you. be seductive, and she will take care of all the extras on the side so that the two of you can get together.
 
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