I'm back! Oh yeah, and did I f**k up?

[TheTrimReaper]

Hey all. You might remember me from a few years ago. I was in an LTR with an HB, who I got utilizing my eroded-as-you-will-soon-see DJ skills, but it ended a few months ago. A correlation?

Now I'm trying to get my back on track. My skills are gone, believe me! So I'm gonna be seeking advice from you guys for a bit.

The new girl:
I met her at work. Sunday night we went out on an "action date"-our third date counting my first lunch invitation.
She informed me she would be back at the office on Monday and Tuesday. I think "not the best situation" for an out-of-practice Trim, but what could I do?

So on Monday, she invites me out to lunch. It's good. I tease her a bit. Sympathize a bit. It ended well enough. Kissed good bye.

Then on Tuesday, things seemed tougher. I felt strange seeing her a third day straight, so I tried to not be around. However, there was a work meeting, so I had to be there. She ended up being there, too.

Now my questions to you.
From what you've read, did I f**ck up? And what, if not everything, did I do wrong.

She hasn't called back. What is your take on it? She got the job and is busy? She is s**t testing me? Did I come across as disrespectful and turn her off? She initiated the last date and paid, so is she testing my interest to see if I call regardless of her words?

What should I do at this point? Call back? Wait (I'm guessing forever) for her call? Call back (and probably get the answering machine) bring up my comment and tell her how that totally came out wrong and seemed disrespectful and/or pining, then pine for another date on the machine?

Thanks ahead for your help and don't worry about being gentle (cause I know you won't!)

 

[dirtycm]

hey man, i feel ya and have been there in this type of situation. First of all, how long has it been. Time frames are helpful to get perspective.

Honestly, I would just go bout my bisness and meet some other girls in the process. If something comes up that you want to do and maybe you think she would enjoy too call her up out of the and invite her.

It seems like you are focused on calling to be in touch. Sounds needy to me which is no good. Why not reframe and focus on activiities you want to do and being with someone to enjoy them with. Get busy and the right person you will find will enjoy these same activities and will be chasing you to keep up...-dirtycm

 

[TheTrimReaper]

First of all, how long has it been. Time frames are helpful to get perspective.

How long have I not been DJing? Over three years.

How long have I been talking to this new lady? 4 weeks
1st week=one chat
2nd week= lunch and number close
3rd week= two dates
4th week= one date so far (she bought lunch)

 

[GirlCrazy]

How many women are you working on?

When you're only working on one, you get too wrapped up in her, giving her more attention than she deserves, and continually second-guessing yourself (which you're doing right now).

 

[TheTrimReaper]

How many women are you working on?

Thanks GirlCrazy. Good advice.

I'm only working on one, this one right now. It took me over a month to get over losing my fiance. And this lady showed some interest at work. I just haven't gotten out to look for others.

I do need to get out and get some girls in the pipeline. I know that would help. Let me tell you, just going out with this one helped me forget about the fiance almost overnight.

So what do I do about this one? Try to find more ladies and let her call if she wants?

 

[GirlCrazy]

So what do I do about this one? Try to find more ladies and let her call if she wants?

I would just work on getting those DJ instincts back, and look at this current chick (and the next couple dozen) as practice. It takes a lot of work to get back to the top of your game, and until that happens, accept that you're probably not going to make the best decisions, and don't put such high expectations on your game.

Whether you screwed up with this chick or not doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things - there's still about a billion more chicks to practice on. So call her if it suits you, or wait and see if she calls you - it shouldn't matter. Your own personal development matters much more at this point than any piece of tail.

 

[IronFar]

You've already "gone AFC" on this chick. NEXT her and move on.

 

[TheTrimReaper]

Hey Guys,
Thanks for all the help. I didn't call, but she called today. Date is planned for Monday. Maybe I'm making the right moves but I'm
not confident about what I'm doing anymore.

 

[Chrispy]

Hey, just relax and go with the flow. You sound like you're doing more than fine. I always advise people to have more than one option. I think it's male nature to get clingy and AFC when there's only 1 person we're dating and it is early on.