IHAB/single mothers

anonymous12345

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I trawl several different kinds of places — night clubs, dance places, bars — and all I find is IHAB and single mothers.

Some have the principle of “no single mothers, no exceptions” and that includes me so far. But I’m considering skipping that. I won’t get dragged down: won’t meet the kid(s) or take responsibility, all that. I would consider such a situation better than none. It do require some discipline, to not get drawn into it all over time.

Thoughts?
 

Gamisch

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There is a reason why men say NSMNE. It's a lose lose situation for a single man. Been there couple of times.

- she'll most likely wants you to go fully beta right away; you gotta be down to be a stepfather.
- the real father Alpha widowed her; there is a reason why she is single( she'll tell you due to his mistakes, and I have NEVER met a single mother who said it was all her fault,NEVER). Because she secretly still loves this man,all he needs to do is fix whatever he did wrong . And you know how we men are, a new bf might be that final motivation he needed. He might also start blaming YOU for their failing relationship. Be ready to fight.
-you will always have to adjust your schedule to her kid; dont be fooled into believing you won't notice the kid.
-extra uncontrollable factor; if the kid doesnt like you , you're out.
- no matter how big you investment, you'll always be #3 . Kid, Babydaddy, then you(and only if you go for option 1, play stepfather.)


I would rather go for the IHAB types. Before the interaction stops you might say the magic sentence " That's cool ,if you change your mind and wanna hang out this is my number"(or downplay to SM). Bf nowadays is mostly a 6 months project, where after 3 months she'll actively starts her venting process for new meat. Especially if you meet her while going out, and she shows you IOI.

If you wanna go for single mothers, it's gotta be 100 % on your terms. She gotta know EXACTLY what her place is.
 
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BillyPilgrim

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There is a reason why men say NSMNE. It's a lose lose situation for a single man. Been there couple of times.

- she'll most likely wants you to go fully beta right away; you gotta be down to be a stepfather.
- the real father Alpha widowed her; there is a reason why she is single( she'll tell you due to his mistakes, and I have NEVER met a single mother who said it was all her fault,NEVER). Because she secretly still loves this man,all he needs to do is fix whatever he did wrong . And you know how we men are, a new bf might be that final motivation he needed. He might also start blaming YOU for their failing relationship. Be ready to fight.
-you will always have to adjust your schedule to her kid; dont be fooled into believing you won't notice the kid.
-extra uncontrollable factor; if the kid doesnt like you , you're out.
- no matter how big you investment, you'll always be #3 . Kid, Babydaddy, then you(and only if you go for option 1, play stepfather.)


I would rather go for the IHAB types. Before the interaction stops you might say the magic sentence " That's cool ,if you change your mind and wanna hang out this is my number"(or downplay to SM). Bf nowadays is mostly a 6 months project, where after 3 months she'll actively starts her venting process for new meat. Especially if you meet her while going out, and she shows you IOI.

If you wanna go for single mothers, it's gotta be 100 % on your terms. She gotta know EXACTLY what her place is.
This might be true for younger mothers, but if the woman is older (say 35 or so) you're better off with her being a mother. Otherwise there will likely be greater mental health issues if not baby rabies.

For the majority of users on this forum: IHAB means "I have a baby". You're welcome lolz.
 

Gamisch

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This might be true for younger mothers, but if the woman is older (say 35 or so) you're better off with her being a mother. Otherwise there will likely be greater mental health issues if not baby rabies.

For the majority of users on this forum: IHAB means "I have a baby". You're welcome lolz.
I agree. It's only natural a woman 35 + has kids. It seems surprisingly hard to find a woman after that age without a whole bag red flags.
 
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