If I don't call, will she think I don't care?

T Money

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So this girl and I had like 2 months of crazy adventures together. Non-stop hanging out. We weren't "together" though. Then the other day she breaks down with "I just need to be alone right now." She's got a lot of sh!t on her plate and DOES need to figure sh!t out, but should I wait for her to call? I do really care about this girl a lot. I want her to call me, and i'm pondering calling her, but I don't think it would be a good idea. I don't want her to move on though, and start dating some other dude.
 

DJ HOSSIX

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Ya werd, dont be her emotional tampon!!

Throughout my readings on this site it seems that the only time a guy should call a girl is to schedual a date?

can someone ellaborate on that...

If one wants to get a girl, they shouldnt talk on the phone a lot or at all?

thanxx
 

TheJoe

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hanging out for two months but not being together.. that screams friendzone.

not being funny, but if she wanted to be with you she wouldnt have played the 'alot of things on my plate' card.
 

NSUballer

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If she really wanted to be with you she would make room on her "plate" for you.
 

T Money

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She wants to be with me, but she has a lot of growing up to do, and needs to figure out what she wants. She's going through a transitional period in her life right now.

I'm thinking I just have to wait.
 

DJ HOSSIX

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T Money said:
She wants to be with me, but she has a lot of growing up to do, and needs to figure out what she wants. She's going through a transitional period in her life right now.

I'm thinking I just have to wait.
I read a post my pook who wrote something about this.

It was about when your date flakes on you and how the guy would always make an excuse up...like he would say "well she did say she was busy, maybe her car didnt start up, if she didnt want to go out on a date then she wouldve just told me no...and etc"

I hope your not one of those guys that makes up excuses for himself just so he can have hope.

Be rational
 

jigga23

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dude b1tches say all that sh1t all the time about being alone and needing to figure things out. Its just an excuse. you probably did something wrong along the line. I have some examples. they have all the same moral.

I was in the same situation with my ex actually it happened three times. the first time i argued with her calling her selfish etc. i eventually said all this fvcked up sh!t to her. we didnt talk for a couple of days. i tried to call her maybe 2 or 3 days in a row only once per day she wouldnt return my calls. i saw her out. Went up to her and said hey im sorry about saying that stuff. take it for what u want. but if you dont want to work it out then thats your choice and then i just walked away. She called me later that night. we eventually got back together.

The second time she said all the bs and i didnt say anything fvcked up to her. we still talked everyday but not hang out, then i saw her out went up to her tried to talk then she was acting like a little fvcking kid. this happened 2 nights in a row. the second night i just said hey lets talk she wouldnt so i said fvck it left. didnt call her or anything like we would usually do (meet up after the bars and stuff). she called the next day in the evening cause she was probably wondering why i didnt really come after and i just walked away. we got back together and lived together.

the third time same fvcking excuses. this time i tried a little bit to talk it out but i just said fvck it and packed all my sh!t and just moved out one night. she was very needy after i left it was obvious and dumb a$$ me was there for her after, whole different story though.

The morals are a girl says this sh!t if she wants out. the other moral is if you want a chance with her walk away right now no calls or anything. isolate her by herself. she will feel lost and need someone unless she has someone already. but dude walk away rihgt now no phone calls to her whatsoever. if she calls just dont bring up hanging out with her at first see if she does then go from there.
 

milrenkb

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T-Money man, my queston is why are you seeing her every day? Next time around you have to try to limit yourself to like 2-3 times a week. Why would you deny her the gift of missing you? When you do this she hypnotizes herself into thinking that your all these wonderful things, and 99% of the time, when shes recreating you inside her mind, your portrayed as this wonderful man that can do no wrong. As a result she gets to prolong that rush of initial feelings and in the end form a closer bond with you. I know this sounds like manipulation, but if you ever overhear a group of girls talk, and realy pay attention its something that 9 times out of 10 she wants (10% of the time shes a real butch type of gal).

This is why playing the field until one of the girls you really like wants to be exclusive, is possibly the best strategy (for lack of a better word) you can adopt. When you do this you become much more non-chalant and laid back knowing that if things with one girl go sour than you have another one waiting in the wings. In todays society this is more than acceptable and you should take advantage. On a side note whenever I start seeing one girl I still refuse to see her everyday, and its something I tell her upfront. I mention that even though I'm glad that we're taking things to the next level, I still want my own life, doing this keeps me grounded as well as gives me some space.

Now before I go, one more thing. I know that we didn't come to a conclusion that everyone could agree with in your "Is it ok to be emotional" thread you started. However one thing that I believe everyone agreed on was not snap at any girl your seeing. Saying things like "i eventually said all this fvcked up sh!t to her" will only work against you and I'd like to remind you to remember that.

With that said I wish you the best.
 

flexion_

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Looks like she is spinning too many plates and she dropped one - you.
 

milrenkb

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Espi said:
I follow no set phone rules...


because the more scarce you appear, the more likely she's intrigued:


Always keep things brief...always be on the way to something...always be late for an appt. You be the one to end the conversations, set date times, etc. End the date in an hour...she'll respect you because you have a l;ife...you're busy, but she's lucky enough you schedule her in.

The phone is a tool...
T-Money these are things you should commit to memory.
 

T Money

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good advice fellas, good advice. Next time around, i'm defenitely doing a once a week or two times a week thing.
 
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